how do you avoid CIO when all baby does is cry??

[jellybelly8]

This is probably a rant more than anything but I hate reading all the negative stuff around CIO when I feel like all my baby does is cry!

She is 5 months old and does have reflux which is a bit better managed and so slightly less crying but otherwise she is still such a distressed baby. If you are not supposed to leave them to CIO, what do you do when your friends and family are in a village 50mins away and baby cries the whole 50min journey without fail. Not even a grumpy protest but full on distressed, ear shattering screaming. What baby doesn't sleep in the car!!

Same goes for trying to shower/wee/leave the house/cook.... Everybody's told me to get a sling but she does the same in a sling and I've tried lots of different types. My only options are pram, boob or bouncer and I am exhausted. She feeds all through the night, this can be every hour just for a reassuring nibble (if I don't allow this then we have melt down which results in less sleep or all). Never ever fallen asleep by herself or in a cot. Never managed to transfer her without waking (eg from arms to cot). DP can't get her to sleep so it's always down to me. She refuses bottle, thumb, dummy, comforter... she seems to have absolutely no way of comforting herself even when she seems to so desperately want to sleep/wind down/switch off.

I feel like background screaming is a way of life for me without actually opting for it as a method of sleep training, I hate hearing her cry but I can only minimise it up to a point. Most people have CIO as a last resort method when all else fails, I feel like my baby was born crying it out :-( I have never known a baby to be so wired!

Anyone else relate to this?

Our first was like this and it was truly awful. I thought I would never manage through the next 24 hours and felt like everyone else loved every minute of being on maternity leave. We tried everything and what really made a difference was time. He got older, his stomach muscle got stronger and he got happier/slept longer. No one knows what that is like for months on end unless they've had a baby like this. Big hugs and a huge amount of sympathy. You'll get through it because we have to. You're doing amazing. It's the hardest thing I've done and we have two now! It took three years to contemplate another one like that but (touch wood) DS2 doesn't have the same sick/crying/reflux issues. Good luck OP. Do whatever you need to to get througj each day. Its survival at the moment! x

Please speak to doctor about having Neocate (special formular for reflux). Please please try this as my little one had reflux and was so distressed all day even with meds and this changed our world! Also ours refused dummy but when he had Neocate he accepted it and it really gave him comfort so persevere with trying to get him to have a dummy. I know it's tough, we had a year of issues and no sleep etc but things will get better.

Oh man, my first was a lot like yours. I didn't know anything about kids do I thought it was totally normal. He cried all the time. He would be happy after his feeds, for 5 mins, and then start crying again. He fed every hour through the night for a year. We tried EVERYTHING to get him to sleep at night. I couldn't take him out much because after getting to a place he would cry and scream until I had to leave. I honestly found him very difficult. I somehow was very brave and had another child 2 years later. Complete opposite. I was shocked and amazed that babies can be easy going.

My oldest is still a handful and difficult. I think he will be the one I worry about the most. He still cries and whines about everything. He is almost 5 now lol. Oh goodness, I don't know what to say. We did find though, that he got easier at 3.5 in terms of tantrums decreasing.

Good luck, you will learn to deal with him in your own unique way.