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Parenting

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Original poster

Help me please, 8 year old and piano lessons

6 replies

DarkBlueEyes · 03/03/2016 19:37

Help me mumsnetters, I am at the end of my tether and out of ideas. DD2 has been learning piano for a few years and is very musical and can play stuff by ear. We recently moved house and as she'd been moaning about piano for a while I asked her several times if she wanted to do piano again, yes she did, was she sure? Yes she was. Fast forward... found a new teacher who is elderly but just lovely. DD2 no longer wishes to do piano, constantly moaning, rolling her eyes and generally behaving in an appalling way. Borderline RUDE to teacher (I apologise after each lesson) though does her practice, under sufferance, when prompted. My dilemma is this: if I stop (have to give a term's notice) then I am worried that she will think her appalling behaviour will have got her what she wants. If I continue with lessons I may kill myself. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place, I don't want to reward the bad behaviour by allowing her to give up, especially since I explained she wouldn't be able to do just decide she didn't want to do it any more. WWYD? Any wise words? I am out of ideas.

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knittingbee · 03/03/2016 19:56

Personally, I'd chat to your DD about why she's changed her mind. Maybe she's not happy with the teacher? Then explain that talking about her issues are the best way to resolve them, rather than moaning/eye rolling, and work out a solution with her. She's old enough to understand.

Thistly · 03/03/2016 21:35

It tough, but it sounds like you might need to recognise that the teacher/ pupil relationship is not working. So as above, discuss with both parties. Also does she like the music she is doing? If she doesnt, it's gonna make her feel the teacher is boring.

starry0ne · 03/03/2016 21:40

Are you there for lessons..Are they his words ... what does your DD say?

I would be tempted to have a conversation with her not around lesson time and consider swapping teachers as it doesn't seem to be working

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SunnySomer · 03/03/2016 21:41

Just because you think the teacher is lovely doesn't automatically mean your DD does. As a PP said, you need to talk to her, ask her what she thinks. Tell her it is embarrassing that she is so rude and ask her why she's behaving like that.

We've just moved house and so changed piano teacher and my DS's behaviour has transformed completely. (It wasn't bad before, but now he skips happily out of lessons, chooses to practise daily, is constantly polite and cooperative.... Definitely a response to the individual).

Jenijena · 03/03/2016 21:43

I had several teachers as a child, and played to a proficient standard. But there was one who did all the right things but I did not enjoy. Talk to your DD.

Muskey · 03/03/2016 21:56

I had the same with my dd at the same age. We spent the best part of the next two years being embarrased by her behaviour towards her piano teacher. We kept asking her if she wanted to stop lessons and she kept saying no. I finally couldn't take it anymore and stopped the lessons.DD then found my flute and wanted lessons. We gave it a go and we have never looked back. When we talked later about it dd said she was bored with piano because her piano teacher wouldn't let her sit any exams because she wouldn't practice. She is now on grade 3 flute.

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