At what point in the day do you lose the will to carry on?

[SouthWestmom]

I have four dc, two have additional needs and one is concerning me with general hyperness and lack of sleep/shut down. Dh works away a lot, I work, we are stretched financially so it's all quite busy.
I get in at 6, do pudding and supper, do pkd lunches for next day, do bedtime, and tbh it's awful. Ds is currently awake, crying, in and out of my room, stressing about school, shouting, and up to now he and middle ds have been bickering then mates etc. Oldest ds (needs) has spent large parts of the evening shouting at me ('are you thick?') which will be related to some thing I don't understand yet.
I don't get an evening, they won't be quiet, they hate sleep, it's just arghhh! Sometimes they are great. Just not now, when it's after 10.30pm

I have absolutely no advice but sounds tough. My two are still small and that's hard enough. Didn't want to run. When hubby is home could you do something for you? Even just head to a friend's for takeaway and a movie?

Sometimes I lose the will to live by 9am after no sleep and a tantrum about changing a shitty nappy

I've no advice at all as I've only got 1 (who will probably remain as 1!) but I wanted to say it sounds like you are doing an amazing job

I've lost it this morning already and I have way less in my plate than you.

All the usual things people suggest about self care just seam like adding more to your load.

I hope your finding at least some joy in your life

9am😀 I remember those days. Thanks zilla. Rosenwyn, it's not a bad idea, it's just finding the time. And jump, sometimes they are brilliant fun, it's not relentless. I think I've just realised I can't go from 7am to 10.30 pm with either work or children and I need an evening to eat/ watch tv/ read.

No you eould have to be super human to day that day in day out

I guess. I feel like if I was better though they wouldn't have issues. Oldest has mental health difficulties and external input, it's all a bit exhausting (selfishly!) by bedtime.

What I need is to just have them all upstairs at some point, not the little ones with all the bedtime fuss then the older ones coming down when it's finally quiet - like yoyos!