nearly 3 and nowhere near ready - am i alone?

[xenabelly]

Hi

I know this question has been asked before BUT please can I ask it again...my daughter will be 3 at end of Jan and she is nowhere near ready for knickers.

She is showing some signs, telling us that she has done a wee and a poo and taking her own nappy off after she does even one wee and asking for a new one. She can go for hours without a wee aswell.

We've tried having her naked and putting potty next to her and saying 'what do you need to do if you want a wee' - she looks at your sweetly and says 'i have to go in my potty, not on the floor' and then 5mins later wees on the floor next to the potty.

My MIL is driving me nuts saying I 'should try harder' and 'she's got to learn' and 'she's never known a child so late in nappies' etc etc but as I have a few 'toilet' issues I'm trying desperately to be relaxed as possible about the whole thing and just let her do it in her own time.

Am starting to doubt myself now though and getting a bit embarassed at play school and with friends children who are potty trained and are much younger.

(I should add that she was an early walker and fab talker at an early age, keep reminding MIL of this and saying she can't be 'first' at everything)

HELP! Just need some reasurrance!

thanks

I didn't toilet train DS1, found it all too stressful. When he had turned 3 and was still in nappies I started to send him to the toilet with DH to watch what he did. Then one day he took himself off to the toilet and hey presto, except for the usual accidents that you would expect, he was toilet trained in no time. I'm going to do the same with DS2 who is 2 1/4 at the moment. Let him take the lead with timing.

Not sure if this helps or not but my thoughts are that they will only do what they want when they are ready, from walking, talking toilet etc.........I found it would have been easy to give into pressure and force him to toilet train and the pair of us end up wrecks or wait for cues from him. My experience was quite painless, except of course the comments and watchful eyes of others!! I used to just say 'well he walked at 10 months and was an early talker, we can't be at the front of the queue for everything'

No you are not alone at all. Mine were all over their 3rd birthday before they were toilet trained.

I didnt push any of them, I am a big fan of nappies its all in one place and no rushing around at every pulled face etc.

Your DC will be toilet trained and happy when she is ready. Try not to worry

Ignore your MIL.

I know someone whose MIL proclaimed that "You're not doing it properly. You have to sit them on it while they eat, and smack their bre legs if they do it on the floor. All mine were trained by 18 months!"

Evidently she was both insane and lying.

This was ds last year. He is now, well a year older, and it's all fine. It's amazing what a difference a couple of months or so makes.

I waited till after DS1 3rd birthday. He wouldn't even tell me if he had done a wee or poo up to that point, but having 2 in nappies was just costing too much so had to just do it.
I will be honest, the first 2 day were like hell, but then it just seemed to click, and he had maybe one accident a week for a couple of months, and then all was fine.

I'm so glad I've found this thread. DS2 is 2 years 10 months and I've just begun to think about toliet training. He doesn't seem ready at all. When we ask if he has done a poo - he sometimes says no (even if we can smeill it!).

I guess we have to start soon. We have introduced a potty in the bathroom but forget to sit him on it on a regular basis (to get used to it). I've been reading him the wonderful "I want my potty" - but not every day. Also, don't have lots of cheap pants (any suggestions where we can get them from?).

DS1 was dry even at night by his age. He was Pt'd in under 2 weeks. I think we picked the perfect time with him.

My very experienced childminder said not to think about it until after Christmas. I think he'll go full time when we start!

Hi

DS is now 3.1 and will have almost nothing to do with potty training.

Getting a bit at end of tether as is getting infections etc in groin area - have been at doctor once and has sores again on willy today. This is as he poos a lot, wont tell us , tells us hes clean when hes not. Has only started to do dribbles on toilet when absolutely told to sit on toilet and given chocolate for doing something. Will not poo on toilet at all.

Maybe shouldnt have done this but have now banned TV until he does a poo on toilet. He really wants TV back but still wont poo.2 days without TV - no result.

Any suggestions. Worried as I assume hes maybe frightened of pooing on loo.

What do we do? Must say there was little pressure on him till recently but really need him to train due to worry over infection and also poos so much sometimes that have had dreadful leaks round house etc!

i was lucky as ds1 was tiolet trainined by 2.5 we put the potty in the living room and let him run around bottomless. managed in a week. i wasnt going to fight with him and was quite prepared to wait longer if ned be. my mother was at me about toilet training as well. if we haddnt be sucessful we would have waited. ds1 is now 3.5. boys are often bad about pooing and often hold on to it.my advice is just take a break from it for a while. we now have great famiy conference in the bathroom when ds1 is having a poo. it is at his request that we come and talk to him!