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Original poster

OMG - now I have BOTH ds at home for holidays I just can't cope!

34 replies

Legacy · 22/12/2006 16:44

Sounds pathetic I know, but DS2 just started school this year, and prior to this was in nursery, so this is the first time we've really had them both (7 & 4) at home on school holidays for any length of time.

They are driving me mad!!!

How on earth do you cope? The dynamic is just so different with both of them...

Weekends aren't the same as we normally have stuff scheduled. But the last few days I've been trying to get stuff done for Christmas and they've literally been bouncing off the walls and furniture... both constantly annoying each other... neither will do anything separately in their rooms... whenever they are in the same room it ends up in a wrestle within minutes... constant requests to do stuff which requires my input (games, complex construction etc)... constant asking 'what can I do?'... even when we've been out to the park etc they're back to the 'indoor niggling at each other' within minutes!

I can't be out with them ALL the time, but they really are doing my head in! How on earth do you cope???

We try to stick to limited amounts of time for TV/ computer games etc, so I don't want that to be the solution.

Advice please....is there a secret to managing this??

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iota · 22/12/2006 16:50

oooo I had that pleasure for the first time this summer - it wasa long 6 weeks esp as dh was away for 3 of them

Original poster
Legacy · 22/12/2006 16:54

Iota - I am truly shocked by how much of a nightmare it seems. I'm already wondering about Kids Clubs for Easter

Serously though, what does everyone do? Do you 'agree' with your kids that it's 2 hours of chores/ 30 minutes of games with them/ 30 minutes in the garden for them??

Do people 'direct' their children towards activities every day e.g. now you're doing drawing/ collage etc?

OP posts:
DumbledoresFairy · 22/12/2006 16:58

This first struck me the summer holiday before my eldest started school. I thought we should take advantage of the last opportunity to take a holiday during term time so we went away in June/July. When nursery finished, I then had to get through 8 weeks of summer holiday with a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a 5 month old baby. It was the longest 8 weeks of my life! Shortly after it finished, I admitted I couldn't cope with the unremitting strains of motherhood and a childminding friend of mine took the baby one morning a week while ds1 was at school and ds2 was at playgroup so that I had one morning a week to myself. It was my lifeline for 3 years!

As to how you cope, I don't know the answer. Just remind yourslef that this is the worst time as they are so excited about Christmas and the weather is so horrid they can't run off much energy outside. Not all the holidays are this bad. Also remind yourself, it is normal to feel this way from time to time. Why do you think some mothers have the date their children return to school highlighted on the calendar?!

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Pinotmum · 22/12/2006 16:58

A word of advice - don't let them play hide and seek in your bedroom if you don't want them to find the xmas pressies Alas I never take my own advice.

DumbledoresFairy · 22/12/2006 17:00

One of my ploys this holiday (mine have been off a week now) is to let them have some spare blankets etc and suggest they make a den with them. It seems to fill an hour or two and the mess usually isn't too hard to clear up once you have picked up and folded the blankets.

iota · 22/12/2006 17:02

IME boys need daily exercise ( a bit like dogs) - trips to the playground, walks in the woods, swimming etc. dh took them to town this afternoon

we call it "taking energy out of them"

seems to work for a few hr after, until they refuel

futurity · 22/12/2006 17:15

My two boys are 5 and 2 so I have the same age gap and the joy that you are going through to look forward to! DS1 has just finished his first term at school so has been busy busy for weeks and now no school he is needing to be occupied or worn out! DS2 helps with the tiring out bit as they too fight/run around like mad things laughing/hitting etc etc. Thankfully DS2 has a nap but then DS1 wants un-divided attention which is understandable but I feel drained and it is only day 3!! I started thinking about summer holidays but figure at least it won't be cold and foggy then (will it!!?)

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 22/12/2006 17:18

Mine are 5, 4 and 2 adn I'd love the know the answer. They are driving me nuts.

Spoke to my friend earlier and she's finding the same with hers (5 and 2) - she reckons it's just Christmas - the over excitement of it. THey are wound up to the max from school etc and they need to explode.

Doesn't help you of course, but there you go. I was ready to cry earlier and ran upstairs and out of the way the minute dh came in, so I know how you feel.

LadyTophamHatt · 22/12/2006 17:35

Is it worth me posting??

I'll only be repeating what you've all said....plus I'm 38 weeks PG.

Fucking great fun!

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 22/12/2006 17:43

Nah, just copy and paste mine LTH, with a bit extra for the bump (you nutter!!)

charliecat · 22/12/2006 17:45

Let them make mince meat of the argos catologue with scissors

ediemcreedie · 22/12/2006 17:48

I am sorry but you do sound totally pathetic.
There are only TWO of them and they are toilet trained, can follow instructions and don't need a pram.

DumbledoresFairy · 22/12/2006 17:49

Crikey edie, that was helpful as always!

Haven't you ever had a day when your kids drove you bonkers?

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 22/12/2006 17:49

Did you put your 4 old in nursery through the holidays when the older one was off school then? Just realised you said thsi was the first time you've had them both in the holidays!!!

LadyTophamHatt · 22/12/2006 17:52

I'm actually quite un-stressed(I'm sure thats not a real word) ATM, believe it or not.

3 ds's, 38 weeks Pg and Dh at work until 10pm....and I'm not stressed.

I deserve a medal

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 22/12/2006 17:56

You do!! Pregnancy with a 3 yr old and 9-18month old was bad enough! Can't belieeeeeeve you are doing it again!!

LadyTophamHatt · 22/12/2006 17:56

neither can I!!

RubberDuckWithCranberrySauce · 22/12/2006 17:59

[hands out medals]

It's been a little calmer here in the DuckPond. Yesterday was hell.

I've made it quite clear that in the holidays I'm not their entertainer, that they're responsible for their own fun, they have plenty of toys and each other to play with. On the other hand, I will make sure there's at least a couple of (low key - there's hype enough at christmas) fun activities to do each day and regular breaks through the day like snack times, chill out with tv etc, to look forward to.

The "I'm bored, Mummy"s have dramatically decreased today, so I'm staying firm and getting on with feeling ill and attempting poorly to get housework done.

I do strongly believe that my job description is Mother not Entertainments Officer. Not quite sure I've convinced the kids of that yet though

Pass me the Baileys...

SueW · 22/12/2006 18:00

I agree with iota - and I only have one girl! But seriously some wrap up warm and get out of the house time is crucial, even if it's a peasouper out there. A couple of hours in the morning should help. Some lunch; 'movie time' in the afternoon, perhaps with some fresh-popped corn might give you a couple of hours to yourself.

Troutpout · 22/12/2006 18:18

Going out and using up energy is really important
Also...they need to learn to be bored i think sometimes...so that they go off and find something to do or potter by themselves. Sometimes they just get too used to being 'entertained'...perhaps your 2 boys need a bit of practice at being bored Legacy (a definite lifeskill imo)
Ds(9) is still a bit bouncy for the first few days of the holiday (imagine boinging puppy) ...but by day 3 he has usually got into the swing of it and chills a lot.
dd (3) is much harder work...but ds takes the flack a bit (poor boy)

Original poster
Legacy · 22/12/2006 18:26

GlitterFarTooLongNameToType...

We didn't keep the younger one in nursery full-time during the hols, but he did go part-time, as we'd paid for it anyway, and it relieved the pressure, and allowed us to so some more advanced things (museums/swimming etc) with DS1. I was working full time at the time anyway, so DS1 spent some holiday time in KidsKlub/ with Daddy/ friends etc - it wasn't the same as now.

I know it sounds pathetic, but genuinely it has taken me by surprise how difficult it is. I have been shouting at them all day today and that was after being out for 2 hours this a.m.

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Original poster
Legacy · 22/12/2006 18:28

Edie - do you have 2 boys? If not, then I'm afraid you really won't understand... Boys are soooo different to girls. I have friends with girls who happily spend all day doing craft things. If I am not supervising my 2 dring craft stuff the kitchen will look like a nuclear explosion.

I DO take them out every day, but I can't spend EVERY minute outside the house (although they'd like to..)

OP posts:
iota · 22/12/2006 18:32

mine are running up and down the living room shouting "score" for some reason

RubberDuckWithCranberrySauce · 22/12/2006 18:33

Legacy - a lot of it is the Christmas hype Plus it's harder to be outside because it's so cold (unlike spring and summer holidays). I try and kick them both out into the (enclosed) garden for half an hour after lunch, but ds2 is a glove refuser so always comes in doing an icicle impression.

It was a long term this one just finished too, so I've found ds1's behaviour in particular has deteriorated as he got more and more tired towards the end. Another reason for me to try and keep activities fairly low key around here

RubberDuckWithCranberrySauce · 22/12/2006 18:34

LOL iota - this morning's activity of choice for them was taking turns to wear a christmas hat, saying "ho ho ho!" then the other one running away screaming... Still, they weren't fighting

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