Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

just curious, so ....

46 replies

WeWishUAMerryXmasNANappyNewYr · 21/12/2006 19:09

what would you think if you knew someone used "little bitch" as a nickname for their child?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
WeWishUAMerryXmasNANappyNewYr · 23/12/2006 03:49

well you haven't offended me! mmm well person who i am talking about does have her msn name as my little bitch is 9 months old today ... so make of that what you will - don't think she always calls her little bitch but more often than if she had just not slept/cried all day iyswim

OP posts:
munz · 23/12/2006 08:21

but I don't see the need to call a child that even when they are naughty, that's the only time I say J is being a little horror is when he's been real tiresome all day. I honestly don't think it there's any need.

munz · 23/12/2006 08:22

(didn't offend me either, it's good to have balance)

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

velouria · 23/12/2006 23:06

Hiya, I do call my little girl a buggerlugs to her face lol which where I'm from isn't considered swearing more a term of endearment (could sound perjorative to someone from another background).

I used to have a friend who called her dd everything under the sun including the c word in front of her. She now wonders why her 6 year old has the attitude of a 16 year old.

hunkermunker · 23/12/2006 23:10

I have an incredibly relaxed attitude towards swearing, but I loathe children being spoken of and to in this way. I rarely swear around the children and I certainly never say anything like this about them.

Quite apart from anything else, a 9mo is incapable of being a bitch!

VPL · 23/12/2006 23:45

I think your mate sounds thick WeWishUAMerryXmasNANappyNewYr.

Hunker - I loathe any kind of aggression or malice directed at children. I do think it depends on how the listener interpretes the language though. I've heard loads of parents say 'oh, I could kill you' or similar, but I don't think they actually mean it and I'm pretty sure the kids don't worry that they are about to be murdered by their mum. It's not something I say btw.

It's all about context and interpretation isn't it?

hunkermunker · 23/12/2006 23:49

Yes, I guess it's about interpretation - it does sound ugly to me though. I really, really don't like anyone putting more adult characteristics onto babies though - I know that it's a term of endearment in some places, but I heard someone calling his 5mo DD "sexy baby" a while back and I was

wickedwinterwitch · 23/12/2006 23:50

I keep opening this thread and closing it again. I can't think how anyone could think it was anything other than vile and disgusting to talk abut a child in this way or to use the word bitch to describe a child. But last time I suggested this on mumsnet, well, it didn't end well.

I can't see there's anything to be discussed tbh.

wickedwinterwitch · 23/12/2006 23:51

And no, I don't think it is all about 'context and interpretation' - I think it's about poverty of language and vocabulary and poor parenting and laziness and it's just horrible.

hunkermunker · 23/12/2006 23:52

Good point. It's never bright people speaking of their children like this, is it?!

wickedwinterwitch · 23/12/2006 23:54

Well, I don't know a single person irl who would refer to a child this way.

VPL · 24/12/2006 00:03

Ok, so I have poor language and vocabulary skills. I agree WWW.

I do object to the 'vile and disgusting' and 'poor parenting and laziness' comments though.

Not too keen on bein called 'not bright' either Hunker.

WeWishUAMerryXmasNANappyNewYr · 24/12/2006 00:38

i disagree about the sexy comment and the buggerlugs one. buggerlugs sounds quite chute if you ask me (although i'm afraid to say i am being a bit dumb in that i don't know what it means) and my cousin often calls ds sexy man and that doesn't offend me. it just means she thinks he's really cute!
VPL i thought you said its not something you would say? people weren't directing those comments at you - more at this girl who just for the record is not a mate just someone i know.

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 24/12/2006 00:43

I was talking about the woman who called her DD a "Little bitch" - not you, VPL!

VPL · 24/12/2006 00:56

I might be wrong but I think WWW was directing her comments at me because she quoted me in one of her posts, and I had said earlier on that I had called DS a 'little bastard' whilst chatting to a friend.

I wouldn't call a little girl a bitch, but maybe I would if I had a little girl. I don't know, but I'm not going to assume anything about anyone based on the language they use and that is what has pissed me off about some of the comments on this thread.

I'm sorry HM. I really did think you were directing that at me - paranoia alert needed! I have said similar things about my DS but I've said them to people that have grown up around me, know me, know how much I love DS and know that it means a completely different thing to when I call his father a bastard. I'm not bothered about having a limited vocabulary. I'd look like a right dick where I live if I could express myself with dignity - nobody would understand me and they certainly wouldn't want to talk to me.

I think I might go to bed now cos I'm waffling and getting all het up about things that don't even matter much.

wethreebobkings · 24/12/2006 09:04

I always thought is was "bug-a-lug" so just a cute little rhyming thing. Bugger isn't a swear word here - it's in adverts on the telly and everything.

munz · 24/12/2006 09:28

I don't like little girls being called 'sexy' either - I prefer to call a little girl beautiful, or pretty, and handsome for a little boy. sexy to me is giving a child an andults label and trying to make them grow up too quickly - prob not but it's just my thoughts.

(sorry if that offends btw)

wickedwinterwitch · 24/12/2006 09:39

VPL, I wasn't directing my comments at YOU. What I said, exactly, was

"I keep opening this thread and closing it again. I can't think how anyone could think it was anything other than vile and disgusting to talk abut a child in this way or to use the word bitch to describe a child. But last time I suggested this on mumsnet, well, it didn't end well.

I can't see there's anything to be discussed tbh."

I stand by that post, completely, it is, imo, vile and disgusting to call a child a bitch or bastard.

And then

"And no, I don't think it is all about 'context and interpretation' - I think it's about poverty of language and vocabulary and poor parenting and laziness and it's just horrible."

I stand by that post too. If you want me to clarify, I will. I do think it's poor parenting to call your child a bitch or a bastard. I don't refer to my children this way. I do think there are plenty of other words in the Engluish language to describe being angry, upset, sad, desperate, disappointed, at the end of your tether, bitter, hurt, crushed etc etc. I don't think using 'bitch' or 'bastard' shows great language skills, no. So I would argue that we're talking about poverty of language and vocabulary and...laziness - of vocabulary. So what I meant was, I consider it lazy if someone can't be bothered to find another word that conveys what they might be feeling and resorts to insulting adult language to describe a child.

Like I said, I've had this discussion before here and it didn't end well but hey, this is a parenting board, some of us are bound to have strong views about parenting and what constitutes good and bad parenting, that's fair enough!

wickedwinterwitch · 24/12/2006 09:39

Agree re bug a lugs, it's not bugger lugs, it's rhyming, nothing offensive about it at all imo!

munz · 24/12/2006 09:55

WWW - agree with the vocab comment - hence why I use the term 'horror'. I don't even call other children any swear words - even if they are, and after an occassion when I said 'bloody' at tots i'm now v careful not to swear around any children as it's not something I would like J to associate his first words with tbh.

as I say my cousin uses the term - 'little shit' which to my mind is really bad - I mean how can a baby no older than mine be a 'little shit' or a 'little bastard' most of the time all of it i'd say it's not their faults there's something wrong - teeth or what ever so there's no reason really I can see what those words should be used. or 'pickle' what's wrong with that word if the child's been particually hard work and you're running after them all day.

VPL · 26/12/2006 05:01

WWW - stong opinions on parenting are fine by me, but this isn't a parenting issue. Well, not unless you're making assumptions about someone because they'd use a word that you don't like or a word that was interpreted in a way that you can't accept or understand.

Poverty of language/lazy vocabulary - so what??? I'm not sure if your last paragraph was a clarification or if you were inviting me to ask for one. Please clarify further if you can because I still don't understand your point.

I'm not articulate. I wish I was but it's not a failing is it? Besides, this is mumsnet and I know there are lots of posters that can swear like sailors on one thread and express themselves perfectly without swearing on another. Whether swearing is lazy vocab or not is another issue.

It's not bad parenting to call your DS a little bastard out of his ear shot to a person who knows the meaning behind the words. How could that possibly affect my DS? Actually it was good parenting because I was chatting to a good mate who loves my DS and laughed his head off when I told him what he'd done to make me so angry. I laughed as well and then went to bed feeling happy because I'd made someone else laugh, laughed myself and got something off my chest that was hurting me. No children were harmed in that process.

Is that really vile and disguting? I hate thinking that anyone feels my parenting skills are poor or that I'm a bad person. I don't want anyone to think I'm a good parent or even that the mother referred to in the OP is a good parent. It just bothers me when people won't look at things from an alternative point of view and make extreme judgements based on relatively small things.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread