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Parenting

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Original poster

Do you think that parents who have horrible children know it?

20 replies

Twiglett · 12/12/2006 21:07

c'mon face it .. pick your jaw up off the floor ... some kids are just not appealing .. some kids you don't want your children to play with because they're just not nice

do you think their parents realise it though?

(stirry stirry thread)

OP posts:

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southeastastra · 12/12/2006 21:07

Tortington · 12/12/2006 21:08

i have a son who is nothing but one of those giddy lads that annoys in only a way boys do. i didn't like boys like him when i was 13 -now i have one as my son.

i do think i am an anomally though.

some kids are very precious and their parents have no idea.

iota · 12/12/2006 21:08

some do

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marymillington · 12/12/2006 21:09

i think they do. but they could never ever admit it, even to themselves.

but most children, i guess, like most people in general, have some redeeming features.

FluffyMummy123 · 12/12/2006 21:09

Message withdrawn

Original poster

Twiglett · 12/12/2006 21:15

oh yes, without question

but back to horrid kids

OP posts:

wanderingstar · 13/12/2006 10:06

I think most don't unfortunately. Just think about all the spoilt fussy picky destructive(or other negative adjective of choice) children you know, then think of all the indulgent smiles you see their parents giving them...

marialuisa · 13/12/2006 11:14

DD is not every adult's cup of tea but she is not unkind, nasty or brattish. Other kids like her, it's just adults that seem to have a love or loathe reaction to her.

Some of the most vile kids I know, including the supermadam in DD's class, have lovely parents.

MerryMellowmas · 13/12/2006 11:20

My dS1 - 6 and is a complete PITA. I feel sorry for his teachers. It took him a year to realise shouting out "Big Boobies" in class was not good.

DS2 - 2.7 is completely dectructive and screams and shouts most of the time. He ran into the school playground yesterday, jumped into a huge puddle and splashed a lady standing next to it, you should have seen the look she gave him!

I know mine are a bit undesirable but am hoping they grow out of it.

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 13/12/2006 11:25

i think some dont relaise, but some do.

neice is a wimpy whiney crying child, my sister doesnt like it.

jabberwocky · 13/12/2006 11:29

I think the vast majority don't realize it or simply refuse to see it.

HumphreyCushiONtheFirstNoel · 13/12/2006 11:30

One person's 'bright, questioning and determined' is another person's 'complete brat'!
I have to admit that I liked all children, until I had children of my own. Now there are some that I have to try very hard with, in order to search out any redeeming features!
I only know of one family where the children are rude, aggressive and unpleasant, and the parents really cannot see it. I feel very uncomfortable and embarrassed on the few occasions we see them socially, as the parents genuinely don't notice the negative reactions of other people to their children.

HoHoHorsewoman · 13/12/2006 11:46

Some people do , but most don't. My sister's eldest is a handful, and she readily admits it and sees all his faults. She can see his positive side too, but is well aware of how others perceive him. He is a little sod, actually, but very popular with other children, just not adults, particularly. Whereas my two angels

wrappingpaperBOwZZAndribbons · 13/12/2006 11:56

What do you mean by "horrible"?

There is a boy in DS's class who causes a lot of trouble, he swears (so is teaching all the others) and uses sexual type words, he is also very rough with the other children and have heard several parents have to talk to the children about him. I don't know what his parents think. Was amused that he was cast as an angel in the play though.

Loshad · 13/12/2006 12:27

Don't think they always do - the most unpleasant boy in one of my boys's classses - rude, violent towards other children, hurt me badly (an accident) didn't apologise, appalling table mammers, a nightmare in class apparently, doesn't share, takes other childrens toys (he's 6 btw) - his mother thinks he's just a free spirit

Jimjams2 · 13/12/2006 12:34

People blow very hot or cold with ds1. They either aboslutely adore him (get a lot of comments about how amazing he is) or they are so mortified and embarrased by him that they can't even mention his name to me.

I think ds3 is a nightmare- but his childminders have said very sweet things about him. Nursery see him the same way as I do, but find him funny and say nice things about him (often jokey).

busybusymum · 13/12/2006 12:40

I know a couple of lads who are PITA's. they have been threatened with being banned from all groups they attend, they are rude and just plain horrible to everyone. They swear and bully others. Yet mum things they are and treats them as if they are Royal princes!

according to her they are angels and if anyone says otherwise she blames everyone else!!

ladymuck · 13/12/2006 12:44

I think parents are aware of other people's perceptions, but it may not always tally with their own. I have 2 ds's, and in terms of behaviour, affection etc at home they're much of a muchness. Ds1 is a grumpier, moodier character, ds2 is cheekier and more mischievous. But in terms of getting on with things, their manners etc much of a muchness. However the reaction from other adults is markedly different between the 2 of them: people almost go over the top in the praise of ds2 - every week at preschool I'm told how delightful, lovely, charming, bright etc he is. OTOH with ds1 the best I can get is "He's had a ds1 day today".

I don't think that we parent them particularly differently, but they do have quite different personailities.

We had a couple of familes from school round for lunch, and was discussing ds2's Christmas wishlist (Barbie accessories at the top!) I was treated to another parents analysis as being "Well ds1 is so hyperactive that ds2 is feeling neglected and hence is turning to wanting girls toys to attract your attention". It did make me wonder at what other judgements parents come up with?

SueBaroo · 13/12/2006 15:31

My eldest niece is right pain in the hindparts, and I'm always astounded at what she gets away in front of her mother. I honestly think SIL is just unaware. She's a teacher, so she's probably used to dealing with a room full of challenging behaviour, so I'm guessing she just employs the same tactics.
I always try to keep one eye on what's going on and intercept any situations that might escalate, but SIL only seems to pay attention if something is shoved in her face. In fact, my niece will shove a cup in her mothers face and say "I want Juice". She's 5.

Kaz33 · 13/12/2006 15:36

Mine are challenging and can be a complete pain in the a*. Personally, I blame the parents.

Infact, I find other people defending my kids and my parenting when I get depressed at what a s**t parent I am. My eldest son has issues which impede his ability to interact with other kids.

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