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Original poster

Stubborn 30 month old won't go in the potty

11 replies

elisent · 16/05/2004 16:39

My daughter absolutely refuses to be potty trained. She will sit on the potty but never does anything in it. It doesn't matter how long I have her sit there. I've tried reward charts and treats and she still won't go. Of course as soon as I put a diaper (nappy) on her she goes right away. If I don't put a diaper on her she has no problem with just going on the floor! Should I give up?

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LIZS · 16/05/2004 17:03

Going through same myself with dd who is 32 months. I have taken the pressure off after a couple of weeks of effort and her refusing to go until she was wet. She seems to at last be taking herself to potty for wees (no puddles so far today!) although poo sometimes still an issue. I think it depends how much time you are prepared to invest in it. If you working or are out a lot and cannot be done with the mishaps give it a break. It could be that your dd just hasn't yet learnt the art of voluntarily letting go at the appropriate time. Our dd has only really acquired that skill in the last 2 months or so.

coddycodcod · 16/05/2004 17:04

Put her on the loo then!

karen99 · 17/05/2004 10:24

would the 'let her choose' apply here too, ie. let her choose which potty she wants in the shop or put stickers on her existing one so it's somewhere she wants to be? What about dolly in a nappy and now dolly's on the loo? (I'm not even near the potty training phase but thought I'd throw those in!)

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Siviwe · 19/05/2004 20:29

'Elisent' I feel you...you are in the exact same situation as I am. My daughter is 29 months and prefers to think of her 'potty' as somewhere she 'rests' and refuses to do anything except when in a nappy...I am in dispair. I ve heard that putting them in ordinary underwear makes them eventually ask to use the potty as the discomfort of a wet panty?

Dec · 19/05/2004 20:52

DS1 went through exactly this - had a real 'phobia' for going anywhere but in a nappy. Unfortunately(?) working full time I had to leave a lot of the worry to the nursery he attended at the time. We all tried every way around him, including taking him to the loo with his friends to see how it was done (bit of peer pressure perhaps?) Eventually, at 3 years old I took umbridge at constantly buying nappies and just sent him to nursery in pants and with six pairs of spare trousers! By the time Friday came around he was completely toilet trained and within a couple of weeks was dry at night too. I suppose being uncomfortable may have had something to do with it...? All I can suggest is that you persevere without scaring the child too much and wish you the best of luck!

indamb · 30/05/2004 16:30

elisent my dd 30 months exactly same. she will not part with it, quite happy to sit on potty/toliet but wont do a thing. she is happy to wear knickers but will hold it for hours. any extra advice

Weatherwax · 30/05/2004 17:00

My dd1 wasn't ready until she was 3, then she hardly had an accident.

My dd2 was 1 month short of 3 when she started using the potty regularly but if we are not careful she will still have an accident every day. We have to keep reminding her, the discomfort of wet trosers doesn't seem to work. We have a fimbles "potty" alarm clock!

However I took dd2 round to a friends house with her potty in the early days. The friend is 3 months younger than her. Friend had even refused to sit on potty for any length of time before then. They both sat on thier potties before we left and friend was well on the way to being fully dry within the month. So peer pressure does help with some of them!

Weatherwax · 30/05/2004 17:02

Oh I forgot to say dd2 has her own potty, wouldn't be seen dead on one of her sisters! She'd rather sit on the loo, and her loo seat which is much like her potty.

Leah4 · 30/05/2004 18:43

Elisent and Indamb, my daughter is almost 29 months and also refusing to use the potty. We started this week and she was doing quite well. She managed to use the potty and toilet for a couple of days, but she was holding on until the very last moment! She wants to go for a wee about every 2.5hrs, and is dry when she awakes from her nap.

She has not used the potty at all since Friday, and continues to just do it all in her knickers. I am thinking of giving her a break for a couple of week, as I am getting a bit frustrated and I don?t want her to be so upset when asked to use the potty or toilet. Is this a good idea? She has a reward chart and has chosen her potty, and I have even bribed with ice-lollies! Nothing has yet worked.

We have been out a few times with just knickers and she has done fine ? although she had used the floor as a toilet before leaving the house. Any useful ideas would be very helpful.

chrissey14 · 07/06/2004 15:00

hi all

mine DD IS 25 mths old just got her back into sitting on the potty going slowly

sponge · 07/06/2004 15:24

My dd never used a potty. She just didn't like it, so we got her one of those portable kiddy loo seats and she went on the big loo like mummy and daddy. A lot of it was to do with wanting to be like us for her. Once we'd figured that out the transition was pretty easy although she did still have accidents, and actually still does occasionally - at 4 - when she gets too absorbed in what she's doing and forgets to go in time!
Try not to worry about it, don't push her if she's not ready, and try never to make her feel bad if she doesn't manage it or has an accident.

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