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Parenting

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Original poster

sleepover worry

12 replies

poppycomeshome · 05/10/2015 20:56

My dd who is just about to be 10 has had a very long friendship with bf, both are now really desperate for a sleepover. The only problem is the mother and their ds are lovely but the father is really creepy, seriously creepy. I am SO worried about her going there, I have no idea why exactly as I am sure she would be fine, it is just instinct nothing more. As other dc have been on sleepovers it is not that, it is just well, him. Am I just being stupid? What would you do? Everyone is putting a lot of pressure on me to agree at half term.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Floppy5885 · 05/10/2015 20:58

Follow your gut. 90% of the time you will be right

AnyFucker · 05/10/2015 20:58

Listen to your instincts

Floppy5885 · 05/10/2015 20:59

Will she keep your confidence if you tell her the honest reason why you aren't keen?

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Floppy5885 · 05/10/2015 21:01

You can always say you will play it be ear but then find some excuse.

AnyFucker · 05/10/2015 21:01

have the girl at your place, unless you think that will increade the pressure for a reciprocal visit

Original poster

poppycomeshome · 05/10/2015 21:01

No, I am not sure I can tell her the real reason as she will probably freak out and refuse to go even for tea! I just really dont like him, and I never really come across this before. I do like most parents. I feel really bad about it, he is probably really lovely!!

OP posts:

Snossidge · 05/10/2015 21:03

Host the sleepover at yours? I'd listen to your instinct.

Original poster

poppycomeshome · 05/10/2015 21:03

I do think I run the risk if we invite bf here of HAVING to agree to their invite. I have already used quite a lot of excuses just to stall to now. I am running out of ideas, and dont really want to stop dd going on sleepovers elsewhere, so cant really say we dont do them...

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Original poster

poppycomeshome · 05/10/2015 21:04

Thank you so much for all of your replies btw x

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AnyFucker · 05/10/2015 21:04

Bottom line, you do not have to do anything you are not comfortable with

Has anyone else in your friendship circle commented on this bloke ?

Snossidge · 05/10/2015 21:11

Don't feel pushed into putting your DD in a position that you feel could be unsafe just for the sake of being polite or avoiding awkwardness.

I think you just have to say you're not comfortable with her staying over there. Yes, it might be difficult if the mum really pushes but you don't have to agree to an invite.

Original poster

poppycomeshome · 06/10/2015 10:27

Thank you very much for your posts and replies. I have read them all, and feel much stronger now to simply say no to the whole thing. I would not sleep a wink worrying about her, and we could potentially have years of sleepovers with them, and not just the one.

No one has really said anything about the Dad, he is nice enough, it is something I am picking up on, couldn't even put a name to it. We have all met people like that, it is just very unfortunate he happens to be the father of my dd's bf! There is something I don't trust about him, I feel uncomfortable with him.I would sit elsewhere if we were on a tube put it that way!

No sleepovers unless we are comfortable is a good way forward, thanks everyone!

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