Feeling down about 2.10yo DS not being toilet trained yet and going to give it a real push this weekend - please give me some positive encouragement!

[BotBotticelli]

Ds1 is 2.10 yo and we have failed to potty train him yet.

We just haven't put any really time into trying to get it sorted - i had an EMCS 7 weeks ago with ds2 and have been very ill since with an infection in my uterus. Just feeling better now 7 weeks later. But obviously now have a newborn to contend with as well!

Prior to giving birth I went 15 days overdue so was essentially 10 months pregnant, the size of a house and totally exhausted/fed up whatever.

Anyway all these factors have combined to mean that ds1 is now approaching his 3rd birthday and we have not really tried potty training.

Feel really down about it :-(

He is a very big boy: looks like a 4yo and has a very big vocabulary. He doesn't fit on changing tables any more and I am starting to feel embarrassed changing him when we are out and about.

He is in nursery 3 days per week so I have decided to do a hardcore 3 days in the house potty training marathon this weekend to try and get it done.

Has anyone else been in this situation and managed to get training done?

Anyone else felt down and depressed about this?? Please reassure me that he won't be in nappies until he is 10??

I really think you are over thinking this and getting worked up about nothing!

Boys are often 'later' than girls with toilet training. Are you sure he is even ready? Can he tell you when he needs to go/has been to the toilet in his nappy?

My older two ds's were around 3.4 yrs when the trained, I made sure they were absolutely ready and they cracked it in a couple of days with only one or two accidents.
Much easier and less stressful for all involved.

My youngest ds is 3 in November and sits on the potty or toilet when the mood takes him but we haven't actively started 'training' yet and probably won't until after Christmas.

He won't, don't worry. DS1 had two failed attempts at potty training at 2.10 and 3.2 (both leading to infections because he was holding it in to avoid going on the potty or toilet). I then just gave up on it until he asked me and at 3.5 he was trained within about 2 days. I am now firmly in the camp of not rushing things. Children get to it when they are ready and trying to rush it before leads to much more hassle for everyone. DS2 is almost 3 and has shown no interest in potty training at all so we haven't bothered yet. When I asked the HV about DS1 at the time she said that so long as he was trained by the time he went t school there was no issue at all. I get the embarrassment as I felt that a bit too, but there really is no need as it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. With regard to the act of changing, DS2 won't go on any of those tables anyway as he hates being high up and worries about falling off, so I just carry around a mat and change on the floor. Pull ups also mean that a wet change can be very quick and hassle-free.

Forget about toilet training for a couple of months until DS1 is 3, then re visit it.

I always waited until they almost ask - I honestly dont see what the rush is

I think you are overthinking it. However, at 2.10 he is probably ready (I don't really go with the trend of just leaving it until much later) if you want to give it a try. I trained DD1 when DD2 was two months and actually it made life easier - only one in nappies, less stuff to carry, etc.

Day one - at home. No trousers or pants. Just t shirt and bare bum. Potty neary. Frequent trips to the loo/potty. Massive praise for any successes.

Repeat as necessary. As you get more successes, add pants and then trousers and start venturing further afield.

Good luck. It's not fun, but it's fine

DD2 is 3 in November and she still isn't trained. She knows when she is going in her nappy, and we have had one pee in the potty and one on the floor. Then we gave up because she was so distressed about the whole thing. That was in August. I don't know when to try again.

It is actually the one thing that I really dread with DCs. I dreaded it with DD1 too, and can't actually remember anything about her doing it, except all the accidents on the floor. She was dry long before she was 3.

My DS wanted to wear pants at age 2, but took forever to stop having accidents. DD just had no interest in toilet training at all, and was about 3 when I decided it had to be done. She trained in a day because I used a star chart for going to the loo. You really can't say how long it will take, or that it will be difficult or easy. But your child does need to be ready for it.

I'm another believer in waiting until they are begging to potty train - honestly, still being in nappies at not yet 3 really is fine.

If you do decide to go ahead now, I'd recommend 2 books: Potty training in one week for you to read (a kindle version also exists) and Pirate Pete for your son (start reading it with him a few days before you plan to start). If you can get him interested and keen to do it, you've won the biggest battle.

my ds will be 3 in November and I too need to potty train we should get a nursery place in January so needs to be done. We have 6mo twins and I wonder if it's a lack of time thing on my part rather than him not being ready :(