my DH was bullied because of his bizarre surname - should we do something about this for DS?

[sunnysideup]

Ok, I'd love your wise thoughts on this....DH (and thus me and DS) has a bizarre surname. He's always told me about how he was bullied at school and i've kind of gone "yes, dear oh you poor thing etc etc" but now ds is at school I asked DH was he specifically bullied about his name, and he says yes.

I then suggested we use mine or double-barrel our names and DH said it wasn't worth it as people will always find something to bully about!!! Wtf? My view is, lets not give them anything to start with at least!

The thing with ds is that he isn't an obvious target for bullying - he's pretty assertive, no physical differences for people to pick on, he doesn't appear to be top or bottom of the class; so it's just his name I worry about.

Obviously if we double-barrel our surnames the bizarre one is still there but I feel is a bit diluted.

I wish now i'd stuck to my feminist principles and refused to take the name in the first place! What do you think, what would you do?

[ProfYaffle]

My dh has an awful gynaecological surname but surprisingly enough says he wasn't bullied at school about it. I have kept my maiden name but then i always planned to do that when I married even before I met dh. Dd also has my surname. Yes the PIL were highly p*ssed off (FIL actually said about my surname "my views on this don't matter then?" errrm, no they don't) but they're used to it now.

I wonder if dh's surname would have been worse for a girl, not sure. tbh I think school bullies target a particular type of person and will find a reason to bully an easy target (I speak from experience having been bullied at school) dh was good looking, clever and sporty at school which is probably why he wasn't bullied. Surnames are probably a secondary factor imho.

[Pruni]

Message withdrawn

[Pruni]

Message withdrawn

[ProfYaffle]

LOL, not that bad thankfully!

[Missybaby]

LOL pruni.

and yes, gynaecological surname.... hmmm.... i'm stumped!

go on, more clues please!

[ProfYaffle]

Not a chance I'm afraid! It's really very unusual and I don't want the family's rl name outed. Sorry to be paranoid!

[Missybaby]

no probs - don't blame you

[SecondhandRose]

Someone phoned me yesterday with an unusual surname it was rather like something in Dr Who and I wondered how they got on with it as I expect everyone must say "exterminate" to them.

I used to know some Thickpennys who became Pennys.

[YeahBut]

A poor girl with the surname Cockhead (not a word of a lie) attended the same school as me. She was really bright too so used to have her name called out to go up on stage in assembly for various awards and things ALL the time. Every single time, there would be this stifled snorting laughter from half the school. She looked absolutely mortified. Still cringe for her even now thinking about it. She changed her surname to her mum's maiden name in the fourth year.
I'd wait and see. If it becomes a problem, your ds can always change his name to yours later.

[Rainbow]

I grew up with two girls whose surname was Pardon and Hamburger (yes for real!). We took the mickey but then they gave as good as she got. It didn't last long and your DS sounds as though he can "handle himself" pretty well.

[SecondhandRose]

I used to know a girl with the surname Fuchs, apparently it is german for Fox.

[Twiglett]

you should do something though

you should make up some fabulous family history (or embellish something) to give him so much pride in his name that IF people dare take the piss he can retaliate beautifully and adequately .. something like foreign royalty? or knights on a quest or similar

[CantWaitForTheSnow]

I used to know a 'Littleboy'.

(and he was quite small as well)

[DizzyBint]

i had a biology teacher called mr hymen.

[RubberDick]

We had a french teacher called Miss Hymen, and a biology teacher called Miss Whitehead. Oh, how we laughed....

[amynnixmum]

Well its the opposite in my case - my maiden name is unusual but my married name is quite common. Children did make up silly versions of my name at school but tbh most of the time it didn't bother me. I think if your ds is confident in himself he'll probably be fine.

[amynnixmum]

Good idea Twiglett
I now know some fairly scandalous family history that i didn't know when i was at school. It would have made a great comeback if I had

[CantSleepWontSleep]

Oh no - don't double barrel it - that in itself would be cause for teasing in some circles!

[katelyle]

My dc have both dp's last name and mine. His name is a very old and historic Irish one, but which needs only one letter changed to make a rude word -very irritating. My ds was teased briefly about it in year 5, but as the main teaser was a boy whose name was Piles, the teasing was short-lived!

[NotSoupyOhNoNoNoShesOnABreak]

I was teased a lot throughout school because my name rhymed and that shaped the person I became because I was always too shy to say what my name was and I believe that made me shy in all situations. It's made me doubly careful that none of my childrens' names are easily teasable.

[NotAnOtter]

is it blowcock?

[morningpaper]

I DO think that diluting embarassing surnames works actually

I know a few double-barelled names which have one embarassing half, and you really don't notice it so much

We had a chap with the surname Gay at school but by college he had changed it to Gray.

[23balloons]

in my sons class there is a girl with the surname 'Pretty' - lovely for a girl but she has a brother - not so great for a boy!

[tiredemma]

I booked a Mr & Mrs Cockrott on holiday the other day.

[EllieK]

sorry to hijack but i'm after Profyaffle - come back to the Suffolk Meet Up please!!!!! x