When did your DC 'click'?

[Piazzapiola]

Just noticed there are a couple of threads about dealing with squabbling siblings so will try to be brief.

DS1 is 3.1yo and DS2 10mo.

DS1 torments DS2 all the time. Can't pass him with out a 'pat' on the head, squeezing his thigh, a quick pinch here, a little push there, a 'hug' that leaves DS2 screaming and gasping for air. It's constant. Doesn't help that DS2 appears to have a low tolerance and sometimes just cries when DS1 gets too close.

I try to just remove one of them, ignore and distract but for the more serious (e.g a kick) I'll remove a toy from DS1 or turn TV off if it's on. I try to do an immediate consequence so he gets why I've done it etc.

It's not working though and I know that siblings will always squabble etc but DS2 is still so little. On some days I wonder if they'll ever get along?

Was there an age when your kids just clicked and it got easier? Is it a case of waiting for the younger to get bigger and start giving as good as they get? How much do you ignore?

DD is now 2.6 and DS 5.3 and they now do play together sometimes... I know that's not what you wanted to hear. I got a book on siblings and it emphasised making them a team, even 'against' you if necessary - "what tricks are you two naughty chaps planning together for mummy?!" and rather than any competitions "who can get shoes on first?" (when a bit older, obv) try and go for " can the team-kid beat mummy and daddy to put shoes on?"
Also sharing (if I have to say that word once more in my life my head will explode) BUT allowing exceptions: when something new comes into the house then it is special exclusive property of the owner until the new wears off then it goes into gen. pop.
The old stuff with DS1 helping you with 2 but more with nice things " do you think you can help me tickle DS2s toes and make him giggle?" etc. I'l ltry and find the book when I can peel myself off the sofa...
Reading back I wish I'd actually been arsed to put more of these in place - they sound quite good!!

DS2 appears to have a low tolerance and sometimes just cries when DS1 gets too close.

No wonder if he is being hurt all the time! Reading your post it sounds like you need to step up a bit in terms of preventing the baby being hurt.

^^ yes thanks, that's sort of the point of the post. How do others do this and deal with it and what they've found works.

Make sure you are between them while they are playing so you can intervene before the baby gets hurt, and if you have to leave the room either bring the baby with you or have a safe place like a play pen to put him in.