Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

Original poster

Church!

19 replies

linzimummy · 28/08/2015 13:12

Hi
I've been wanting to go back to church for a while put I have put it off since having kids as I can't imagine how you get little ones to sit through a service. They're now ages 4 and 2. I spoke to the vicar who was lovely and told me to definitely bring them. My partner usually works on a Sunday so it'd just be me. Any suggestions? What do others do? I have gone to weekday services in the past to avoid this but that doesn't fit in with work now. I would like to get them christened but would only do that if we were all regular church goers. How do others take their kids to Sunday services? Our local service is an hour long.

Any advice much appreciated x

OP posts:

maymow · 28/08/2015 14:16

Does your church have a creche and/or Sunday school that you can put the kids in during the service? An hour service is going to be quite long to keep them quiet/entertained unless it's the kind of church where they don't mind kids running around the aisles... Mine is v relaxed and there's always a surplus of old ladies queuing up to give DD a cuddle which helps! If not then I guess colouring books or other quiet activities will help keep them occupied.

Littlef00t · 28/08/2015 15:17

I've never known a church that doesn't have a provision for young children, whether a crèche, separate room that you can hear the service from, or a relaxed approach to noise.

Worth finding out.

BertrandRussell · 28/08/2015 15:20

Just remember that some school admission processes have rules about when children are christened- sometimes it has to be before 6 months.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting Philosophy & religion

Original poster

linzimummy · 28/08/2015 19:26

Thank you for your replies.

They don't have a separate place or Sunday school but the vicar showed me the books, toys etc they have at the back of the hall so they can play. I'm just nervous because there are no other children there. The youngest members are probably in their 50s (maybe 60s). The vicar said they're most welcome and they'd love to have children there but I know my kids will want to leave after about 10minutes!!!

OP posts:

KaraokeQueenOfTheNorth · 28/08/2015 19:30

I think all you can do is give it a try. Personally I think that children should be welcomed into churches and be a part of it, if that means making a little noise at the back with the toys then so be it. Jesus said let the little children come unto me for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.

My church has a kids group so I don't really have to worry, the kids sit with the kids group them go out after about 20minutes to do other activities.

Go along, try it. You may be surprised! X

SomedayMyPrinceWillCome · 28/08/2015 19:34

I have a "church bag", a small bag filled with toys & colouring stuff from the pound shop that is only taken to church (not on other outings). Therefore the toys maintain their novelty.
I used to take DS's shoes off, so when if he was running around at least it was quiet
I also take snacks, lots & lots of snacks

Hero1callylost · 28/08/2015 19:37

I've been wondering exactly the same thing, I used to go regularly but can't imagine my 2 year old sitting still for more than 2 minutes. I can just imagine my whole time being spent chasing after him and worrying about him not sitting still, so I won't get a chance to listen and there'll be no point!

Are there any other churches nearby who already have young children attending?

I see supermums on Pinterest who make 'busy bags' to occupy their children - e.g. they have a colouring book, 'quiet book', things like jigsaws, but mine is just not interested in sitting quietly activities apart from reading stories together.

I think loads church goers are up for being friendly to children though and will watch out for them - maybe it's just a matter of building up a bit of trust/confidence by going.

Hero1callylost · 28/08/2015 19:38

Oh and I think hymns will probably give you a bit of breathing space, as will be an attention-grabber for the children and will give you a bit of respite from worrying about them being noisy!

GasLIghtShining · 28/08/2015 22:45

You need to try taking them and also to persevere. Don't forget that it will take a few visits for them to understand that it's not a playground. As other posters have said have things to keep them occupied (not their favourite car which can be banged against the pews for the whole hour).

I was known to take food but not biscuits and such which leave a load of crumbs - some poor sod will have to clean up behind you and these people are volunteers.

My two were normally the only children at the service I went to. My DD was brilliant but my DS not so. I still took him. The priest was brilliant and most of the Parishioners were. He spent a number of times climbing under the pews into the rows in front!

I would sit near the back so if you need to do a runner you are not walking past everyone.

ffffffedup · 28/08/2015 22:49

When I was little we had Sunday school so the beginning of the service we were in church then we were all taken out after a while to do some sort of activity whilst parents attended the full service. Does your church offer anything like this?

Original poster

linzimummy · 29/08/2015 09:35

Thank you everyone. I think I'll just have to go once and even if the kids need to leave after 5 minutes - it's a start! I'll try to persevere like you say. I'm very anxious about it but I'll be brave!!

OP posts:

ffffffedup · 29/08/2015 10:09

I'm sure your church won't mind your little ones being a little bit noisy, I know the vicar in our church says not to bother if little ones are going up and down the aisle or on the alter whilst the service is on, they are just glad to have them there. Churches should welcome the young ones if they don't that's how worship numbers fall as when the older ones pass away there isn't younger ones still filling the seats. If your church isn't like this then I'd opt to go to a more family friendly church

PotteringAlong · 29/08/2015 11:05

Last week the vicar asked at the children at our church who came on a donkey and saved people. My 3 year old stood up very excitedly and shouted "mike the knight! He rides and saves people". I was very embarrassed, no one else cared.

ShelaghTurner · 29/08/2015 11:08

Don't come to our church. They did away with the children's liturgy group and have banned toys, books, water and snacks (only breadsticks, not a full buffet). Children must just sit and pay attention to the mass. And they get told off for making a noise. And because of school admissions they insist that children are present and sign in at mass from 2.5 years.

We would go to mass anyway but I wouldn't bring my 3yo given the chance. It's a nightmare and extremely unpopular with parents who are over a barrel. Choose your church carefully.

Original poster

linzimummy · 30/08/2015 12:04

Just thought I'd update this to let you know that I took both my little ones to church this morning and they loved it! They played with the old ladies and everyone was so welcoming and loved that we had gone. I'll definitely go again next week. My kids didn't want to leave. They were given toys to play with and chocolate biscuits!

Thank you for all the posts encouraging me to go x

OP posts:

BlueCowWonders · 30/08/2015 12:09

Happy outcome
Make it part of your normal weekend routine and it'll get easier each time

PotteringAlong · 30/08/2015 13:22

good stuff

LittleNel · 31/08/2015 18:03

Church is great, it's a place for calm. I like going along. Good news.
It's great if you have time for reading too or helping out. I helped out recently it was good to receive a bursary for hard work.

GasLIghtShining · 01/09/2015 10:43

That's good.

I tend to find the more I worry about something the chances of it being for no reason increases!

Flip