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Parenting

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Original poster

dont feed them, shove the dummy back in their mouth

24 replies

inmyopinion · 27/11/2006 07:27

hi had to post as am in shock.someone i work with who is twice my age i am 21, she is 40 has had a baby....approx 3 weeks before i had mine.i saw her for the first time in ages the other day and i said "oh so how you getting on getting up in the night?" and she replied "oooh fook that when he wakes up the dummy goes straight in the mouth!"

now am i being stupid or is that just plain cruel....surely little babies wake in the night for a reason.to be fed because their little tummies cant go all night without food.she then went on to say that she was told to maybe start using baby orange juice in the night so the baby thinks theres no point in waking if hes just going to get orange.i was shocked.i mentioned it to someone else i worked with who said they used to do that but with water...but her kid was 1 and stil not sleeping through so i guess that is not as bad.This other lady has 4 kids and this is my first and i wouldnt dream of doing that, i get up no matter what time it is.is it just me or is this cruel?

i do apologise if this is the "norm" but i cant see it myself!

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sandcastles · 27/11/2006 07:29

how old is the baby?

Flossam · 27/11/2006 07:29

but how old?

Original poster

inmyopinion · 27/11/2006 07:30

oh and her baby is approx 4 months now but has been doing it since birth apparently

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lulumama · 27/11/2006 07:30

you do what you know is right for your baby ! feed him! and absolutely not juice.....i your baby is taking a proper milk feed in the night..he needs it ! little babies need milk. not juice and not water in the night,,,,

getting up a dozen times in the night to give a dummy to settle a hungry baby seems a bit counter productive , no? feed, then the baby goes back to sleep surely!?

and orange juice, at night..that;s really great idea..like a baby won't get used to getting juice in the night ! just give milk!

how old is your baby?

Flossam · 27/11/2006 07:31

mean then. But unfortunately we can only do our best by our own babies. Poor child though.

HowTheFillyjonkStoleChristmas · 27/11/2006 07:31

you are brave and fabulous for posting this

I agree

I have also put my hard hat on.

Original poster

inmyopinion · 27/11/2006 07:32

my babs is 3 months and she gets up usually just the once now, sometimes twice but she always gets fed and changed etc!!

OP posts:

lulumama · 27/11/2006 07:32

since birth!!! , well, sometimes, bigger heavier babies dont; ned as many feeds in the night,,but not all night without milk surely?

so yor baby is coming up for 5 months? milk feed in the night is wholly appropriate

sandcastles · 27/11/2006 07:33

too early, imo.

The orange juice thing is a no no too. My friends dd is 2 and still waking in the night. She started to give her water & she stopped waking.

OJ at night is bad, wrong, terrible YUK! They baby will wake for OJ too! So she will not be halping the situ at all! Water all the way!

lulumama · 27/11/2006 07:33

x post...sorry ! 3 months...not sure where i got 5 months!

then yes, definitely milk feed in the night !

lulumama · 27/11/2006 07:34

wannaBe1974 · 27/11/2006 07:34

hmmm, personally I think it depends. How old is the baby for instance? and also does he go back to sleep if he's given a dummy in the night? When my ds was 9 weeks old he learned to suck his thumb, and slept through the night ever since. If he'd cried then of course I would have got up to him, but he didn't, he would stir, find his thumb, and settle back to sleep. Sometimes babies do just need something to suck to help them back to sleep, and generally if they're hungry, then they won't settle.

I also know of parenting manuals that advocate giving water instead of milk at a certain age, never personally tried it though.

sandcastles · 27/11/2006 07:37

awww, the baby is fine. Running around like a loon already! Dd is fasinated!

Sorry you can only manage a smug but tired dance!

wannaBe1974 · 27/11/2006 07:37

no certainly wouldn't have done since birth and ds never had a dummy, so very much followed his lead - he found his own thumb, he settled himself, and I made up bottles for the night for probably six weeks after he first slept through just in case.

And would never have given OJ to such a young baby - but then my ds didn't drink anything apart from water/milk until he was three.

ghosty · 27/11/2006 07:38

I kind of agree with Wannabe ... By the time DD was about 3 months old I would try the dummy ... if she didn't settle I would feed her but really, most of the time she went back to sleep.

However, Orange Juice

And I agree with Filly ... you are fab for posting

lockets · 27/11/2006 07:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

xmasmummy · 27/11/2006 16:25

i have only just started giving my lo juice and she is now 8 months old. she was breast fed at birth but didnt like sleeping so bottle fed at night. she has slept through night since 7 weeks but if she woke now i would still give her a milk bottle as juice got too much sugar to be left in mouth all night (she has 3 teeth)and i would be too tempted to wake her and brush her teeth.

juuule · 27/11/2006 16:37

I would have thought that if the baby was hungry then giving a dummy just wouldn't wash at all. If I had offered a dummy to any of mine when they were hungry they would have spit it out and protested very loudly. I can only think that if the baby is satisfied with a dummy it can't be hungry and is looking for something to suck on. I would think it's unusual for a baby that's hungry to be fobbed off with anything else.
Orange juice isn't necessary at all.
To discourage waking for milk, then orange is unlikely to do the job, water would be better. And I wouldn't try this before 12m anyway.

Original poster

inmyopinion · 27/11/2006 17:53

thanks filly and ghosty!! dont know why im fab though lol just a bit shocked! i see your point juuule about the dummy not working if the baby was truely hungry but surely a baby wouldnt sleep through from day 1? i may be wrong?

OP posts:

juuule · 27/11/2006 18:32

Baby sleeping through from birth and not appearing to need a night feed I think I would take some of what this lady says with a pinch of salt.

xmasmummy · 27/11/2006 21:43

dunno about that ladies. my ds2 now five slept through the night from 11pm to 5 30 am from the day after he was born. (born in middle of night) he was bf and the best baby i could have ever wished for (apart from dd2) who is just as good. and you know the funny thing- ds2 and dd2 were both small born- ds1 was 7lb 2oz, ds2 was 6lb 15oz, dd1 was 7lb 1oz and dd2 was 6lb. the bigger two were not as good at night, ds1 didnt sleep through till 11 months and dd1 slept through at 3 months. ds2 was 1 day and slept through and dd2 was 7 weeks

xmasmummy · 27/11/2006 21:44

also ds2 sleeping through from birth- he has never had a dummy in his life

juuule · 27/11/2006 21:50

Well there you go then. Proof that a newborn - 4m can sleep without a feed for 6.5 hours at a stretch. Perhaps the baby in the op was just waking feeling sucky and not hungry.

madrose · 27/11/2006 21:52

you have to do what suits you and the baby. Mine didn't have a dummy, if she woke I took her into bed and fed her, somenights she would sleep through, other nights not. Just played it by ear. at six months whe was in her own room, used to send DH in to settle her if she woke, sometimes it worked, if not he would bring her in for a feed.

Mind you I love suggling up to her

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