how can I keep my patience?

[shouldbedoinghousework]

any tips on staying calm while dealing with whinging children? Mine have both been at it all day today and I feel as though I've spent the most of the weekend moaning/shouting back at them. They've just gone to Granny's for tea, dd left declaring that she loved me SO much and gave me the biggest hug and I'm now in tears felling rubbish for not being able to handle them better

not really felling rubbish of course! FEELING it!

Felling rubbish sounds good for frustration though...

Depends on why they're moaning I guess, if it's boredom perhaps then that's one thing. My DS does use this dreadful whingy voice though when he doesn't get his own way which does drive me mad, though I usually just end up telling him to stop using that baby voice and talk like a big boy or else I won't listen at all, or some other damaging emotional blackmail like that...

I've convinced myself they're just moaning b/c they like the sound of me moaning back! It's been a good weekend in many ways, we've done lots together so I don't think it's boredom, it really does seem to be complaining for the sake of complaining! I've ignored them, seperated them, and counted to ten more times than I can remember. How can such small people make me feel so awful sometimes?!

How old r ur little ones?
Have you got a dh that helps out?

they're 5 and 3. Dh is usually v helpful but has been working almost all weekend and has been working very hard in general recently. Dd (5) is overly tired after a busy week at school and no amount of "down" time seems to help v much. She gets moody when she's tired -as do I- so we're not a great combination on bad days Ds just seems to be caught in the same pattern is views the whole thing as a game!
I probably just need some time out. They're due back from Grannys soon and will hopefully be tired enough to have a quick story and go straight to bed, giving me a restful evening.

i can fully understand & im sure time to yrself will help.
get ur dh to give u a nice massage ltr & chill out on sofa 2gether.
monday 2morrow

Thanks Cwnbranchildminder- dh not home tonight but kids in bed now so I plan to have bath and early night.
Sorry for the little wallow in my own pity- just a bad day I guess. I try not to let these sort of days get me down but there do seem to be a lot of them just now.

Nothing odd about self pity once in a while. you should hear me on a bad day...

Whenever mine were whingy I tended to assume they were tired and put them to bed an hour earlier!! It quite often worked, so there might have been something in it. They were too young to tell the time, so I could get away with starting the whole bedtime routine at 5pm. It really did work if we had had a busy/exciting day and they were always up between 5 and 6 am regardless of how late I put them to bed, so it was an opportunity for all of us to catch up on sleep.

Both children fell asleep the minute their heads hit the pillow so they were clearly exhausted. Thunder storms over the past couple of nights have probably contributed to both their and my tiredness, plus I'm hopeless at being on my own with them for more than a couple of days and climb the walls if I don't have some space!

My sympathies - I'm having trouble with my patience as well. DS is 2 and going through a naughty phase: deliberately throwing food, persistently disobeying, whining, you name it. I know he's just learning to assert himself and find out where boundaries are, but when I'm tired and have a cold and a touch of PMT it does get a bit tedious.

thanks madamez- it can all get a bit much sometimes can't it? And no amount of patience seems to really make any difference when they are determined to be awkward!
Today has been much better partly coz dd has been at school but also because they've been lovely to each other- it really has been great to see! I've told them how happy it's made me to see tham being so friendly and made them notice how much nicer I am when they are helpful and co-operative.
Fingers crossed for more of the same tomorrow

DS is really hard work at the moment. It doesn't matter what I say or do, he moans.
Tomorrow, when he has a tantrum I am going to have one too (like on the Asda advert) I bet that shocks him into stopping. I just hope I don't have to do it in the street or at the school!