Is anyone else longing for the day when their child/ children are old enough to have playdates without the mums along? My son is almost 4 and the mum of one of his best friends is hard work! She is a terrifically negative person with loads of personal hang-ups and insecurities. Although she describes herself as fiercely competitive in life her personal achievements make it clear her ambitions don?t stretch very far. What she does (and I?m sure we all know someone like this) is steer conversations around to topics in which she manages to oh so subtly, almost imperceptibly so, make comments which are designed to put I, my job, my house or my son down. When visits are over I am a tight ball of tension which takes days to ease off?the worst worst part of this is the feelings of defensiveness I land up having as if I am unwittingly in a competition in which I never entered!
Some examples of her put-downs: my child has been invited to x and y?s birthday parties and I wonder why yours hasn?t; we were looking in your area and realised we could buy much more house than in our own area ? it?s so much cheaper. The cherry on the cake this week was about my new business which I have just started, which incidentally is already doing well. After I had answered a question explaining what it is I do for my customers, her only response was an derisive and incredulous ?do they really need you to tell them that?!? etc etc.
I say nothing, don?t let on at all how I am feeling??but am longing for the day when our children can play together without having to spend time in her company. Obviously it?s easy enough to make sure the children can never play together but they are genuinely fond of one another. Please tell me when is the day going to come when my child?s social life isn?t a torturous ordeal for me at the same time??