Anyone else work despite childcare costing more than earnings?

[Kickedinthetits]

I feel like I get a lot of questions this and I always have to explain myself.
The background is I started a new job when dd was 9 months. It's 3 days a week, highly skilled, creative and really fulfilling. The salary is good for public sector (university / academia).Boss is happy for me to be flexible when I need to for childcare. child illness etc. All fine, life great.
Decided to have another child. DD is about to turn 3 and so will get a few free hours. Found ourselves unexpectedly expecting twins.
Everyone assumes I'm going to give up my job.
Yes, we will have to take a financial hit because all 3 in nursery is going to be about £300/month more than I earn.
On the other hand, I am happier when I am working. Part time is amazing and fits in perfectly. Part time jobs are hard to find in my field and if I didn't work for a few years, I would find it very difficult to find another job. My boss is lovely and supportive. I would be mad to give it up unless it became truly financially inviable.

Why do people think me working is pointless?

Look at it from the point of view that childcare is coming out of your partner's salary. Or that you split the cost. Why look at it as though it's your responsibility?

I don't. Of course it is a joint cost.
But it is a valid calculation when working out how much better off we are as a family by me working.

As in - if my partner chose not to work, we wouldn't be able to manage. We couldn't afford our rent or bills, despite the reduction in childcare costs.
If I chose not to work, we would be slightly better off. But I choose to work anyway.

The only questions I would ask is can you afford it, and do you enjoy it? There are other benefits to working than financial, and it will only be two years before you start making money.

Plenty of families choose to take a financial hit for 1, 2, 3 years for one partner to go to university or retrain in the expectation of it working out better for them in the long run.

I'm surprised you feel that you have to explain it to people. Job satisfaction makes for a happy life, an all-round winner for you and your family. Providing you are not on the breadline, it's perfect.

Exactly what dochollywood said. When children have two parents working, there are two splitting the cost of childcare. It maddens me slightly that there's often a presumption that all childcare expenses should be weighed against a mother's earnings only.

Also. You love your job, it's fulfilling and works well for you and your family.

"It's lucky it's none of your business, then, isn't it?" is the only response to people giving you their tupp'orth about your choices. Just cut them off mid-sentence, boring arses!

If I had left my job to have DS, I wouldn't have a job for many, many years. I live in a county with very, very high unemployment and I wanted to keep my foot in the door. But I never explained that

Take it one day at a time. Twins are more than twice as exhausting as a singleton. Pregnancy can be awful and prematurity is common needing long stays in hospital. There is more than the cost of childcare going on here.

All the more reason to go back to work after maternity leave. I like my sanity. I'd like to preserve it.

Would a nanny/housekeeper not be cheaper than nursery for three? No stressful mornings getting out of the house with three tinies...

It would but then again dd has been really happy in nursery and its a great environment (forest school so lots of outdoor time, she's got friends there plus it feeds into the local school that she'll go to in 18 months).
I guess my point is that as long as we can afford it, I want to work and for some reason people think that this is strange. I agree with the pp who said that there are lots of reasons to go to work. I agree also with the pp who said I should tell people to mind their own business! I just find it strange that it is assumed that there is no point in working when you are a mum unless you have to our unless you are bringing in a significant wage.

If you are working to contribute to nursery fees that you wish your FC to attend, that is more understandable. For lots of people nursery is a necessary evil.

Why do people think me working is pointless?

Probably because not everyone has a highly skilled, creative, fulfilling, flexible job with a good salary and a lovely and supportive boss?!! Some people do just work for the money and others really couldn't afford to be £300 down at the end of the month. In your position, yes you would be mad to give that up but not everyone's in your position. They should probably just mind their own business though.

I worked for zero net pay for two years. However I did keep my job and career, I paid into my pension, it meant DH wasn't the sole earner so reduced the pressure on him, I gave employment to others and I had a fulfilling (although very busy) time. Do what works for you and your family OP.

Yes I did for about 6 years. The my salary increased. Then at age 12 out out goings like school fees and child care stopped.

I am glad I did it, I would not have been able to take a career break and return to my role.

I went back to work, for exactly the reasons you've identified. 3 years later dc1 is at school and dc2 had her 15 hrs funding. I am well established and well recognised in my job (same as I was doing before dc1), which I love. I enjoy the mental stimulation and social side of things. My pension and NI contributions are unbroken.