Need some moral support

[timealone]

I went back to work this week and am finding it tougher than I had expected. DS is 11 months and I missed him so much. I used to enjoy work but this week I got nothing out of it except the money (although I admit it is a new job so I need time to settle in).

Today I feel extra guilty, first because DS is ill, presumably something he picked up from nursery. And second because MIL has stuck her nose in and said he seems very young to be at nursery. She was asking why we didn't work different shifts (totally impossible as we are both in 9-5-type jobs!), get a nanny etc etc I'm not sure why she is asking this now as she has known about me going back to work and DS going to nursery for ages.

DS seems happy in nursery, although he does cry for a couple of minutes when I drop him off. Other than that it seems fine, he has a good relationship with his keyworker etc. I wasn't really worried about it, but just feeling really down about everything now.

Please tell me it gets better!

It gets better. But it is hard.

Look my DCs are older and people went back to work at 6 months then, our children were fine.

Ignore your MIL - why isn't she expecting your DH to be at home? Don't give in to the sexist bollocks that you are the one who has to give up everything.

Equally if you decide to stay at home with your DCs that's a valid choice. The point is it's your choice not your MILs or anyone else. Do what works for your family.

Is your MIL hinting that she wants to have your ds instead of him going to nursery?

No I don't think so, she lives too far away. I know when she had kids, that her and DH juggled the childcare and working between them so that minimal paid childcare was required. It must have been very tiring and I doubt she and FIL saw much of each other. Also, for them, a big part of it was money as they weren't well off and likely couldn't afford childcare.