I have four chhildren twin girls aged 6, ds1 aged 5 (15 month gap) and a 3 year old ds. For a while now I have been struggling with the behaviour of my 5 year old. He is the most affectionate, loving, calm, well mannered boy say 75% of the time. His school reports are excellent, he was described as 'not a boistrous boy' and his teacher who he has been with since reception commented that she had not had to address any behaviour issues with him ever.
However as quick as lightening he can change into an aggressive, difficult to reason with, rude and quite nasty little boy. Now i know all kids can do this sort of thing from time to time, but its the extremity i struggle to cope with and when he is like this i just can't get thropugh to him at all. The incidents which lead to this OTT behaviour can be very minor, and is mostly a response to me saying no to something or one of his siblings annoying him. A very small altercation can then blow up into a huge situation and it is very difficult to pacify him, when he does calm down he is mostly very sorry, sucks his thumb and goes back to being affectionate. He can interchange between these two personalities within the blink of an eye and can be very unpredictable, many of my friends do not believe that he is capable of such behaviour. I am struggling with him as i feel unsupported in my role of disciplinarian, my dp is very soft with the children particularly with ds1 but i am finding i am frequently turning to threats to control him and even told him he'll end up in a naughty boys home and noone will like him that sort of thing just to control him. If anyone has any idea of how I can work towarsd resolving this it would be much appreciated, my ds is a lovely boy and i find it sad that he lets himself down in this way.