TV before school

[Feffy]

Hi, I have three boys, six, four, and two. I'm not keen on them watching TV (the extreme is an entire movie) before school but I feel a bit stuck as to how to keep them occupied (especially the eldest, who has mild ASD; the younger two are still quite good at happily pottering). I'd love some suggestions for how the eldest could pass the time when he has woken up first, he is completely ready and his Dad and I are either still asleep or really busy getting ourselves and the kids ready for the day. He can't read yet. Thank you.

Colouring books, sticker books, mosaic crafts where you stick little foam squares on a picture, scissors with different cutting blades that make different patterns. These are what my son enjoyed when he was about that age.

We also got him his own sellotape dispenser for Christmas

Books wise, any books he would like to look at the pictures of, he doesn't have to be able to read them.

Have the same dilemma here. How to stop them rampaging around the house. Watching with interest.

Can he help out, by laying the table for instance?

I'd encourage him to play quietly in his room.

TV before 4pm is verboten in this house for adults and children alike. Always has been, always will be.

Lego?
Reading
Drawing?
If they are into imaginative play with figures/cars/castles etc - then play with that?
Can they play in their room before breakfast time is ready and then they get the bowls cereal etc out?

Thanks for your suggestions. Please keep them coming! TV was briefly verboten here until the end of the day but somehow it's crept in again in the morning. The younger two will happily start playing, and imaginative play and Lego are big favourites. The eldest is VERY into craft and often gets into it without us suggesting it. I guess it's a case of needing tighten up the rules, probably with incentives. Or putting a few things out, maybe that he hasn't seen for a while, the night before to get him "hooked" when he comes out (but I already feel a bit overloaded with things to do before I can go to bed). He shares his bedroom so he has to come out to avoid waking his little brother. If it's very early I've asked him to stay in bed and listen to audio CDs on our iPod but right now it's too easy and tempting for him to sneak out and start watching (and maybe why he gets up early!). I'll see if books could work. (He currently relies heavily on being read to.) I love the idea of him setting the table but their personalities play such a big part. Eldest, who is really into his own gratification, would need very strong incentives / bribes, whereas no. 2 would really enjoy learning a new skill and being helpful. But eldest might be excited about getting breakfast for himself. He would do it and eat very quickly though.

Thanks for your suggestions. Please keep them coming! TV was briefly verboten here until the end of the day but somehow it's crept in again in the morning. The younger two will happily start playing, and imaginative play and Lego are big favourites. The eldest is VERY into craft and often gets into it without us suggesting it. I guess it's a case of needing tighten up the rules, probably with incentives. Or putting a few things out, maybe that he hasn't seen for a while, the night before to get him "hooked" when he comes out (but I already feel a bit overloaded with things to do before I can go to bed). He shares his bedroom so he has to come out to avoid waking his little brother. If it's very early I've asked him to stay in bed and listen to audio CDs on our iPod but right now it's too easy and tempting for him to sneak out and start watching (and maybe why he gets up early!). I'll see if books could work. (He currently relies heavily on being read to.) I love the idea of him setting the table but their personalities play such a big part. Eldest, who is really into his own gratification, would need very strong incentives / bribes, whereas no. 2 would really enjoy learning a new skill and being helpful. But eldest might be excited about getting breakfast for himself. He would do it and eat very quickly though.

Could you take the remote control into your bedroom at night so it wouldn't be available first thing?

That could work. Although he can be absolutely ruthless about waking us / badgering us, e.g. if he can't find the remote control. But if he accepts the new edict, hopefully he won't be looking for it.

I don't see the problem with him watching some tv before school it's not like your putting him in front of the TV all day. He's quiet and happy and you've not got more toys to tidy up before setting off to school

I don't understand either. What's the problem with him watching an hour or so of TV if he's up before everyone else and you don't want him to disturb you or his brothers? Seems to be a sensible idea that keeps him busy but safe and is not going to harm him for life!

I've personally found that In not restricting tv or computer games at that age they naturally wean themselves and mine will now get up and do a variety of things including, imaginative play, getting breakfast, Lego, building blocks, TV or Xbox.

We're usually too busy running round like blue arsed flies for the TV to go on in the mornings! But tbh I use it as an incentive. If dd is dressed, washed, teeth done, breakfast eaten and sitting in her hat and coat 20 mins before we have to leave then she can have the TV on. It happens about twice a term...

I prefer mine to watch a bit of tv quietly than get all the colouring or arts and crafts stuff out as invariably they get covered in glue or pen before school.

In fact I wish mine would watch it more.

Yes to that! DD quite often draws before school instead of getting dressed and she ends up with green hands

Thanks again. It’s good to hear that some of you think TV is fine. I agree it has its place. Why I started this thread is that lately eldest DS (6) is waking very early and padding to the living room to watch something from the kids’ collection long before the rest of the household is up. My concern is that it amounts to a lot of cumulative screen time if he also watches after school (which I think is okay as he’s dog tired by then), he might otherwise have tried harder to go back to sleep, I’m not sure he’s in a great head space for school (although perhaps he actually is if he finds it calming and restful – depends in part on what he watches, so another thing I’ve tried is excluding all shows with fighting in them) and he can be very grumpy when it’s time to stop watching and get ready. And I know that if the TV was off, provided he’s not in a difficult mood, he can become absorbed in really constructive and creative pursuits, even with limited time.
The incentive idea is great and it naturally limits how much they can watch if they have to get ready first (sometimes they even chivvy each other along). If eldest DS gets up very early, though, he would still have loads of spare time afterwards. Usually DH and I have a lot more to do in the morning than the kids.
If the rest of us were ready early too (highly unlikely) we could copy our neighbours, who take their kids for early morning walks and bike rides. Eldest DS isn’t very outdoorsy so that prospect might encourage him to stay in bed! As might the suggestion of setting the table and putting out everyone’s breakfast. I’ve told him I’ve asked all the mums in the world for advice on other things for him to do before school, and he thinks he can live with playing but looked highly alarmed at the prospect of table setting!