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Original poster

Babies and cats

38 replies

kbaby · 06/05/2004 19:19

Hello,
I'm hoping someone may be able to offer some advice. Im pregnant and have a cat. My mother has told me that I need to be carful that the cat doesnt get in to sleep with the baby and suffocate it. This has now lead me into panic mode. I dont want to rehome the cat as hes lovely. But he is quite a cuddly cat and likes sleeping on peoples laps. Ive bought cat nets for the cot and the moses basket and know that I have to be careful that the cat is not allowed in the room on its own with the baby. Has anyone had any experience of this or can offer some advice on what I can do. Also for how long will this be a problem e.g once the babies 6 months old will it be ok then.
Hope someone can help

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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AussieSim · 06/05/2004 19:26

Dear kbaby, my cat showed no interest in my DS until he started to move about. I took no special precautions regarding cot/basket, although from when DS went into his own room he always slept with his door closed (GF baby), and when he was in with us it wasn't a problem as the cat has been trained by my DH that our bedroom is off limits - door open or closed. I wouldn't lose too much sleep over it. My cat is v old and has always been v aloof with anyone but me, but as DS has gotten older she has adjusted really well and is quite tolerant of his clumsy patting technique not to mention his chasing. I guess forewarned is forearmed but I certainly think that you don't need to be thinking about finding a new home for your cat. Goodluck.

Kittypickle · 06/05/2004 19:26

I've had 2 cats with both my babies. Keep the cat out of the baby's room and never leave them alone together and I'm sure it will be fine. It does go on for quite a time I'm afraid, as once babies move chasing the cat is a great game and it takes a long time for a toddler to get the co-ordination to stroke gently. Be prepared that once your baby arrives you will feel differently about your cat, it will shrink in importance in the scheme of things. I'm sure it will all be fine.

Freckle · 06/05/2004 19:27

We have 3 cats and have never had a problem with cats and babies. I think that as long as you are aware of the potential problem you should be fine. Keep the cat out of the room in which the baby is sleeping and you should be fine. Most cats avoid babies because of unpredictable movements, so it is really only when the baby is asleep that you need to be cautious. In reality, I don't think it is really a problem. There have been very few incidences of cats getting in with babies. It's one of these things where, having happened once, all parents become paranoid

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merka · 06/05/2004 19:37

Hi
Don't get your cat rehomed, we have raised 4 kids with 3 cats, I think the most iffy time for parental paranoia, if not actual risk is up to about 6 months, by then the cat knows not to go anywhere near the crawling, sticky fingered munchkin.

Slinky · 06/05/2004 20:04

I agree with the other postings - we've had 3 cats alongside our 3 children without any problems at all. The cats were always banned from bedrooms anyway, so that wasn't a concern.

The cats have always appeared uninterested in the kids and they had little "hiding places" where they could have a sleep without tantruming toddlers

Now the kids are older and know how to handle and respect the cats properly (one cat has since died - he had cancer ) the cats are always on the scene now - curl up on the kids laps/follow them everywhere and chase the ball when the kids are out in the garden playing footie.

There really is no need to rehome - otherwise you'll miss out on the wonderful relationship between your child and his pet

Posey · 06/05/2004 21:27

Just want to agree with all thats been written so far. No bother from our cat, in fact I think he was a bit scared of dd when she was small and kept well out of the way during waking hours. When they've been asleep in the day, but upstairs with the door shut, our cat would lie down in front of the bedroom door. We called him our little guard cat. He always came running as soon as he heard any cries!!

If you're still concerned you can get cat nets which fit over cots or prams. We had them but never used them.

suedonim · 06/05/2004 21:38

We've always had cats, usually two at a time, and never had a problem. They weren't allowed in the bedrooms, which made it easier to keep a check on them. Hth.

Spod · 06/05/2004 21:48

no probs with our cat either... other than it is now suffering neglect and gets no attention since baby arrived (joke)

eddm · 06/05/2004 22:09

Same here Spod except poor cat so upset she ended up on kittie prozac! Seriously, vet prescribed anti-ds as cat so upset at sudden lack of attention. I did try but with a tiny baby in the house was very rare I got to devote much time to the cat. She's very affectionate and hated being shut out of our room when ds was with us. Now he's in his own room she's much happier curled up on our bed.
PS latest research suggests allowing a cat into the baby's room lessens the chance of baby developing allergies. Presumably something to do with desensitisation. Obviously not when baby's asleep or you aren't around to keep an eye on them, though.

KatieMac · 06/05/2004 22:19

I'm a childminder so lots of children, however the only time he has every been disgruntled (and all he did was get up and leave) was when child (21 months) put thumb in his eye and two fingers in his ears - and wiggled!!
But the cat would rather sleep on a adult - they move less!!

Tommy · 06/05/2004 22:24

I was told that the cat would smell the milk on the baby and want to lick it (ugh!)and, kbaby, like you I was really worried but...I think alot of these are a bit wives tail-y. We put a net on DS1's cot but the cat never tried to get in. I found her in his pram a couple of times but never when he was in it.
I would just keep the cat out of baby's room and keep an eye on the cat. Ours was a bit ignored after DS1 was born and now she lives in fear of being poked and having her tail pulled!

nightowl · 06/05/2004 23:43

ive always had cats (now have 8, dont ask, i take in rejects) and theyve never really been a problem. I have cat nets on the moses basket and car seat/pram but the cats never go near baby anyway. They're actually quite scared of her and always were of ds aswell. one word of advice, if your cat isnt neutered yet get him done, they LOVE to spray on buggies! gross i know but i had to mention it, sorry!

fee77 · 07/05/2004 14:30

I have 2 cats and a 6 month DD, and had pressure from in laws to get rid of cats all through my pregnancy (licking milk off face, suffocating, choking to death on hair etc) but i stuck to my guns, after all they had been my babies for 5 years. Now we all live in peace and harmony! The cats don't go near DD at all.
One bit of advice - get your babys kit out in advance, especially big things like cots, car seats etc and let the cats rub them and sniff them, then when babs is here they will not really be interested. Cats Protection have huge problems with people giving up their cats when they are pregnant, when there really is no need.
Oh and in laws have more important things to moan about now, like is she too cold, why haven't you had her christened etc. You learn to ignore!!!

iota · 07/05/2004 14:45

We had 2 cats before ds1 was born, but sadly lost them both not long after he was born. So when he was 6 months old, we got 2 kittens - that was fun as they were a bit crazy in the way kittens are and pounced on the baby a few times when he was in his bouncing cradle.

However it all settled down and there were no problems when ds2 arrived a couple of years later.

Sadly we are down to one cat again and both the kids (now 5 and 2) love him.

My cat loved to sleeep in the cot any chance he got, so do keep the bedroom door shut. Apart from that have fun - pets are good.

hatter · 07/05/2004 22:45

We have two cats and two kids and no problems - one thing I was quite upset about though - is that as soon as DD1 was old enough she started being a bit nasty to the more sociable of the two cats and pushing her away and when she could talk saying "no" and "go away". I soon realised this was a clear case of her following my example! I realised that whenever I had DD1 with me I would push the cat away - (I know that sounds terrible but she is an overly sociable cat who ALWAYS wants to sit on you.) I was quite upset that I'd set such a bad example! So my only advice would be to be conscious that even from a tiny age you're being watched!

Original poster

kbaby · 08/05/2004 09:47

Thanks everyone for the advice. Im not too worried about when the baby is toddling as I know from my friends children visiting that as soon as the cat sees them it runs and hides somewhere quiet and that the cat and baby both need to get used to each other. It was everyone saying that the cat would suffocate the sleeping baby etc. I supose I just have to be extra careful that the door is closed when the baby is sleeping. The cat normally sleeps on our bed at night so for the past few days I have been closing our bedroom door and have set up somewhere nice for him to sleep in a spare room. Im hoping that way he gets used to not being in our room before the baby arrives.
Thanks Again

OP posts:

gothicmama · 08/05/2004 09:48

My cat and dd love each other although the cat has learnt to leap out of the way etc. when dd was crawling and learning to walk so follow all the advice here it can definitely be done but when baby is mobile make sure the cat has an escape route - we never had a problem about moses basket or cot but the cat knew they were there and was not interested It will all be fine -just be careful if you change dirt tray - gloves and wash hands in anti bac soap straight away

Penguin2 · 08/05/2004 10:12

My only experience of this was when I was expecting ds1 we used to play host to a neighbouring cat (he practically lived with us). About two visits after ds1 was born, the cat went home and never returned again! Sure that wouldn't happen with your own cat though.
I am interested in this question as I now have 4 kids aged 7 to 14 months and would dearly like a kitten (preferably two) and would like to know when you think it is the best time to introduce kittens to the baby. I really don't want to be worrying about the baby pulling the cats' tails. Many of you suggest some problems with little children ( fingers in eyes and ears?! all I was worrying about was a pulled tail!) Do you think there is an optimum age when a toddler can be reasonably trusted to behave well with animals?

papillon · 08/05/2004 10:17

My sister used a mosquito net around the babies cot. Hung from the ceiling and draped around the cot - so the cat could not get in. Worked very well

Her dd is now 6 months old.. the other day she was sleeping with her mother (my sister) and my sister woke up and the cat was on the babies chest... the baby was loving it.. kneeding the cat etc..!!

NomDePlume · 08/05/2004 10:39

Hi kbaby

I've got 2 cats, one of whom is very cuddly/affectionate. I'm pleased to say that they showed very little interest in DD when she was tiny, the odd sniff of the car seat/bouncer and that was enough for them. I always kept the nursery door closed as the affectionate moggy loves to sleep in DD's cot (still takes every opportunity to do so now, at 21mo), so I'd keep the door shut to stop him getting in.

I would exercise sensible caution, ie not leaving the 2 of them in a room unsupervised etc, but certainly wouldn't lose sleep over what might happen.

(WSM, with name change)

ZolaPola · 08/05/2004 12:16

HI Kbaby
Personally think it's ridiculous how lots of baby lit scares mums into getting rid of a much loved cat. My ds is now 3 and we've had 2 cats from before he was born - no problems from them at all, just felt a bit ignored I think especially in first few months, but we all adapted fine. DS likes having pets and says "aah" & "can I stroke them?" all the time, think it's good for kids'education - to teach them to care for something smaller, also some research says LESS likely to get asthma etc as exposed to animal hair etc early on. Good luck

Lilismum · 08/05/2004 12:35

I seen this thread today and wondered if anyone has any advice for me, I have two cats and a dd of nearly a year. One of my cats is very well trained and gentle and is affectionate with my baby but the other has always been a bit 'mad'. That cat doesn't like to go out and isn't just too friendly and on two occassions has scratched my dd's face (I always try to make sure I am in the room with my dd and that cat but both times I was on the phone and had turned my back for honestly no more than 2 minutes). I am now very cautious with that cat but I do love the cat a lot and wouldn't like to re-home unless really necessary but I don't know whether the cat will change and become more tolerant of the baby or whether I should just accept that the cat will never be friendly towards my dd. Has anyone ever been in this situation? Will the cat/baby learn to leave each other alone or should I just accept that it is too dangerous to have the cat in the same house?

Sorry for the long post.

summermum · 08/05/2004 15:52

Have to agree with fee77, our cats used to treat the 3rd bedroom as theres (it was a guest room) I think they thought the bed etc was theres. naturally when Ds 2 came along we were worried how old babies would react to having their room turned into nursery. So we got cot and everything set up well inadvance. For a while they would sleep in cot but by the time ds was born they had satisfied their curiosity. DS is now 9 months and even though older cat does go in his cot when he is not there as soon as ds is put in it she knows to clear out because either I will move her or DFS will give her a kick. Both our cats were really affectionate, the older one would actua;;y sllep on my neck a and chest at times. So don,t get rid of the cats it is not really neccessary.

tigermoth · 08/05/2004 17:49

Hope all these messages have reasssured you, kbaby. I still shudder when I remember a good friend of mine casually saying she had had all three of her cats put down because she was pregnant. I am no cat lover, but that felt so wrong to me.

Our babies never had problems from the cats. It's was visa versa. I put up cot nets but they weren't needed. It was for my peace of mind. The cats never tried to snuggle in with my baby sons. They had their own, far more peaceful hidey holes. It might be a good idea to jazz up your cat's sleeping options around the time your baby is due. Find a cushion or blanket for them, or get a new cat bed.

One cat did mistake the empty moses basket for a new cat bed - understandable really. She soon saw it wasn't for her and kept away.

After just a few months the cats kept well away fromn the noisy, grabbing small thing that had come into their home.

The female cat got quite mother in law-ish. After all she had had two litters of kittens - what's one mere baby against that? She and used to look at me quite critically when I was inexpertly jiggling my new baby around. But her heart was in the right place. She used to lie at the foot of the cot and guard it. And when I breast fed she took great delight in lieing on her back in front of us and displaying her many nipples!

tomkitty · 08/05/2004 18:16

I am 7 mo pg with one cat that hates being picked up and doesn't want to be bothered in general. I am buying a net for the crib from NCT and will try to keep him away from the baby, but I suspect that the cat will be delighted to receive less attention so long as we feed him on time. Maybe they do occasionally get into the crib like pap described but a lot of the worry is surely paranoia or anti-cat propaganda. My name gives me away...

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