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Am I making a rod for my own back with babywearing?

26 replies

emzii206 · 15/06/2015 14:44

DD is 7 weeks old and I've been babywearing (using a Liberty Slings stretchy wrap) since she was about 2 days old! I've never had a problem with putting her down until now! I used to be able to take her out of the sling, put her down in her crib or the moses basket and she would either stay asleep, or fall asleep very quickly. The last 2 weeks, she has turned into a proper velcro baby! She loves being in the sling as long as I am walking or doing the mum jiggle. She will fall asleep and stay asleep for ages....but the moment I stop moving, or dare to put her down, she wakes up and screams blue murder until I put her back in the wrap!! Or if I don't put her in the wrap, I have to hold in in the "tummy to mummy" position and swing from side to side for at least half an hour to settle her again! I'm worried that by babywearing, I have made it impossible for her to sleep by herself, and that this problem will only increase as she gets older...

HELP!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ChampagneShowers · 15/06/2015 14:47

I think you are doing the right thing - they need to feel safe, secure, cosy. Read up on the fourth trimester.

cabbageleaf · 15/06/2015 15:10

I shouldn't worry. In my very limited experience (DS is 6 months): As soon as she gets a bit more mobile (around 4 months, lying on tummy, reaching out for toys) she'll enjoy doing these things and won't want to be in the sling the whole time.

ltk · 15/06/2015 15:15

Mine was worse. Hated the sling but insisted on being carried. I didn't even have my hands free. Like everything else, it is a phase. It will pass.

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DeladionInch · 15/06/2015 15:18

Mines was in a sling practically full time till he was about 5 months. Trotted into preschool at 2 with nary a backward glance.

Baby needs cuddles. Mummy needs to eat. Sling means you both get what you want!

Stubbed · 15/06/2015 15:21

I don't think you have caused this by using the sling. Some babies are like this, and all babies are like this some extent.

They grow out of it. I used the sling constantly for my dd and she's much more independent than my ds (he is older so I didn't use a sling so much, as I only had him to manage - wish o had used it more). She was walking by 8 months so it doesn't stop them being independent.

emzii206 · 15/06/2015 15:35

Thank god! I had an awful premonition that I would be taking her to her first day at school still attached to my chest!!

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ohthegoats · 15/06/2015 19:48

I wore my baby pretty much the whole time for the first three months - we were living in a building site, it was cold and filthy, there was nowhere to put her down apart from in our bedroom, and I wasn't going to live up there the whole time (although I did on some days!) She's 8 months now and while she still doesn't mind a sling or a rucksack carrier, she's a right little mover.. cruising around furniture, crawling away from me in public quite happily. In my mind a baby wants to be close to its mum, and the most practical way of doing that is wearing it. Also, it's just nice.

Latium123 · 15/06/2015 19:55

I'm sure you will be fine. Mine got to 4 months and suddenly decided she didn't want to be in the sling at all! We persevered for a while, bought a few new slings (good excuse!) and she loves it again now but certainly is not reliant on it. Yours is still so little and I think it is lovely to hold them so close at this time. Soon she will be crawling about and biffing you in the face (like mine does now 8 mo!) and you will miss these days of snuggles before mobility.

PotteringAlong · 15/06/2015 19:56

It will be fine!

StressheadMcGee · 15/06/2015 19:59

My 20 month old independent little monkey was constantly in the sling at that age. He still loves it now, and happily watched (as I ruined my back) on a long dog walk yesterday, but he's definitely not clingy anymore. He didn't want to leave the childminders tonight.

AntiHop · 15/06/2015 21:44

I don't think you're making a rod for your own back. My dd is 9 months. I wore her in a sling a lot in the early months. She's happy to be in it now when we're out and about but certainly not reliant on it. She's very independent and loves crawling.

Roseybee10 · 16/06/2015 09:11

6-7 weeks is a classic clingy time. She'll come through it again. I constantly baby wore at that age as dd would not be put down. Then she happily went in her bouncy chair or play mat for ages. Now she's having a clingy phase again argh!
Currently sleeping on me just now as she won't be put down (18 weeks).
X

RevoltingPeasant · 16/06/2015 18:12

Op DD became mega clingy at exactly that age.

Now she is 20w and hates her Close Caboo that we spent eighty quid on and is currently on my lap, thrashing to be put down.

I found it passed by about 8-9 w.

ChickenLaVidaLoca · 16/06/2015 18:31

It is possible, but you can't presume. There are velcro babies who've never even been in a sling.

emzii206 · 16/06/2015 20:09

It's strange, because during the day she will only nap in the sling or on me...but I bathed her at 7pm, and she's been happily asleep, upstairs in her bed since then without me there!! Maybe she is starting to realise that the co-sleeper crib is for night time, and night time is for sleeping?!

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Springtimemama · 16/06/2015 20:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

caitlinohara · 16/06/2015 20:35

I had one like this. He is now by far the most secure of all my children, and I believe it's because he had the comfort and reassurance when he needed it. He still does love a cuddle though Smile. It was hard at times but I don't regret it at all and I now look back with far more fondness at his baby days than my other children's because I can always immediately conjure up that feeling of having him all snuggled up against me Smile.

wearejustlikeKevinBacon · 17/06/2015 10:05

DC3 was carried in the sling until he was 2 1/2, he is my most confident and un-clingy child so far.

squigglehead · 17/06/2015 16:05

Babywearing makes them feel secure and confident, so generally more independent in the long run :) DS was an unputdownable Velcro baby from day 1, I would've died without my wraps! He only likes to go up occasionally now at 8.5 months as he's too busy crawling around it climbing and cruising on the furniture :) enjoy the cuddles while they last!

squizita · 17/06/2015 20:06

Nope! My dd now sleeps in her cot, pushchair and car seat. She was always in her caboo as a tiny.

Go for it they're a godsend!

knittingbee · 17/06/2015 21:35

The phrase 'rod for your own back' really riles me. Babies need closeness. Body warmth. To hear your heart beat. It's totally fine to keep them snuggled close. Enjoy having that little person against you and their lovely baby smell under your nose :)

Roseybee10 · 17/06/2015 22:19

It goes by so quickly. Cuddles are the best memory x

emzii206 · 18/06/2015 09:17

knittingbee can't beat the baby smell Smile especially when she's fresh out of the bath, her hair is all fluffy and smells all babylicious!!

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cowbiscuits · 18/06/2015 09:31

Please don't let anyone tell you you're making a rod for your back, or spoiling her, or making her clingy. A 7 week old is not capable of learning bad habits.

My DS is the same age and he's become unputdownable, we are using sling a lot too.

She is totally normal they just need to be close to you.

I am a big fan of babywearing, partly for the closeness, partly practicality. Get the right carriers and you can keep carrying them into toddlerhood. Its gorgeous when they're a bit older and can "chat" to you when you're carrying them.

Ibu1986 · 18/06/2015 13:33

So pleased to see all these reassuring comments. I have a 6 week old who's being extra clingy and fussy at the moment. Today he took all five of his naps in his carrier. I don't think either of us could survive without it!

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