Pocket money and chores round the house

[kalex]

Listened to a programme on the radio today about this, and wondered what people's opinions are?

My children 6 and 2 are expected to tidy up, put dirty clothes in the basket, and take their plates to the kitchen after meals.

They don't get pocket money, but am thinking that I should give 6 year old soon. But am reluctant to link the 2. IE if you do xyz then you will get pocket money. What do other mners think?

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DH hates me doing it - he thinks I'm 'bribing' them. But I have to say, when I can't get them to do the simplest thing (eg pick up all the paper from the floor) for £2 each, things have come to a pretty pass .....

kalex

dh and i had theis conversation at the weekend and decded that they ought to do jobs because they live here and are part of the family not because they want money. our 2 are 5 and 8, we've just started to give them pocket money this weekend but it won't be linked to jobs.

We have the best of both worlds too ... they get 'grace' pocket money - ie. they get it every week irrespective of any misdemeanors, bad behaviour, or failure to do chores.

But we also do give money as bribes and rewards - for behaviour as well as for doing 'extra special' chores.

The money involved is fairly small - pocket money 40p for ds2 (4), and 60p for ds1 (6) ... bonuses usually 10p or 20p. But it all gets written in a book, and they save up to buy stuff. (Usually Lego Bionicles at the moment!)

My two are 3 & 5 and also do 'tidy up time' and take their plates into the kitchen etc but I don't pay them to do this nor make any reference to the fact that they don't get 'X' because they didn't tidy up. I was however recently given 2 piggy boxes during a visit to the bank and this has got them quite interested in money. This has led naturally to us giving the 5 yr old £1 a week to go into box. Also the tidy up time is never referred to as chores but as part of a routine i.e you play with your lego you have to tidy it up!

I remember doing chores for my mum, to get pocket money, i think i was sort of 8 or something. My kids tidy up when (after alot of shouting and moaning) and they do get some kind of treat. They are not baby babies, and just to pick up there plate when they finished is a help. I don't see anything wrong in it. If it makes you happier then it would make the kid happier.

Oh I don't know Kalex. We've only just been asked about pocket money by ds (6.5yo) and I think I'm reluctant to link the two too. So we'll probably carry on with he has to do minor chores when we are (so he helps with any big tidy up going on) but pocket money is really just that - money for him to spend as he wants.

I also agree that pocket money shouldn't be linked to chores, but then again I'm not totally against bribery when necessary.

My 2 (age 4 and 2) don't get pocket money yet, but the oldest has started showing an interest in money, so we'll probably start it soon. I've been trying to explain the concept of banking to her, because she talks about me getting money out of the machine, and I want her to understand it's not that simple!

i like secur's approach. while i feel that everyone in the family should pitch in to do chores as a matter of course, i rather like the idea of instilling a "work ethic" and the notion that outside the home you have to work for what you want quite early on. as ds is only 2 - i've got quite a while to make up my mind on this!

oh and following on the from the cost of raising children thread, i think after 16 i'd expect them to have some kind of p/t job...

Oh well I am in the minority then My eldest dd aged 5 gets pocket money. But to get the money £1 a week she has to clean her bedroom and playroom and help me with the living when asked. My view was that I didn't want to link pocket money with behaviour, but money is something you 'work' for. Usually she is OK, however I often forget All I want is that at the w/e the whole family helps with the cleaning. As they are not at home until the evening they make less mess during the week and I don't clean up everyday, but on sat or sun they have to help when I ask

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our 10 yr old son gets
£1.75 per week, mostly as he saves more than he spends.
But for this he is expected to make his bad, put clothes away, help clear the table, put the rubbish out, empty the dishwasher in the morning and get showered without answering back... feed the cat, he gets deducted 5p for every misdemeanour but can earn it back by doing extra tasks, this system works really well, he does lots to help now!

i think children should do what they are asked around the house without pocket money. DS1 does toilet and bathroom floor and empies the bins and goes to the shop - and he has a paperround. DD cleans the surfaces in the front room and dining room and sweeps the floor DS2 cleans the kitchen surfaces. as the norm

we do a chart a couple of months before we go on holiday. anything extra than their regular chores we do a tally chart each marker indicates one euro spending money.

we have been downt he route of giving money for chores. it didnt work in our house becuase anything we asked them to do then equated to a monetary value. so we scrapped it a long time ago.

i think children should do certain things anyway, like keep their rooms clean and change their uniforms. both of us as parents work and the kids are old enough to really make a difference.