How do you conquer broodiness?

[katykuns]

I have wanted a third child since before I even had my second, and always had planned on having another... but due to being very overweight, and money being terrible, we had basically decided it wasn't on the cards. I wasn't happy about it, but I wasn't devastated either... that was until very many people in my life got pregnant. This includes my two sister-in-law', and my brother announced this weekend the baby was here. I was incredibly happy for them, but out of sight, I was utterly distraught... I spent some time crying, and pulled myself together, but I have been incredibly depressed since, feeling unable to get myself together, do normal tasks etc... it has really really got to me. Do I just wait for it to pass?
I visited yesterday, and met my beautiful niece, and I was blissfully happy, and the broodiness didn't get to me... I happily cleaned their place and kept baby busy while they got some much needed rest. Got home and felt a bit sad again, and then got up today and I keep looking at the pictures of her and feeling that tremendous sadness again...

I just can't seem to conquer it... and I feel so unreasonable and ungrateful. I have a lovely partner, and two beautiful girls... and it just doesn't feel enough :(

I don't think it ever goes away if you have this. I think its a woman's inherent instinct to have children. I thought I'd only have 2 but then did have 3 - I have 3 children and would not be devastated if I had a 4th - though I am too 'old' now (44) realistically and having had 3 C sections, a fourth at my age.... But you do get to a point where you realise you'd like to enjoy life within their different stages of life. For example, mine are now 2 (nearly 3), 5 and 6 - and we're getting to a point where they're more independent, so its not quite so 'demanding', we all still enjoy doing 'young' stuff and that makes it easier re family holidays - but I could imagine if I had another, you'd get to the point where you have children who are poles apart in what you want to do and therefore won't be able to enjoy all activities together.

If you really think you'd regret not having another, I suggest you have a conversation with your partner as its a decision you both need to make together on the decision whether to have another. There is nothing wrong with acknowledging maternal feelings.

I'm not trying to refute the previous poster's comment, but in my case, the broody feeling disappeared in a few months and I'm so glad I waited it out!
I was in my mid twenties and believe it was just hormonal. Having kids would have been a supreme disaster....shaky relationship, crappy job, very little money, a smoker and renting a tiny apartment. And I didn't even actually LIKE kids. We watched our friends starting families and within a few years, many were stressed, struggling financially, unhappy and many eventually split up. Not all, of course and not to say they didn't deeply love their children, but when I asked if they would do it over again, the majority said no. My own mother said if she had had a choice she probably wouldn't have had kids. Contraception back then was very poor, so couples sprogged with very little foresight. It just happened. Are you able to discern WHY you want another?
Just because others around you are having kids is not a good enough reason to have another one yourself when your circumstances aren't the best. Hang in there.