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Tips from the more experienced amongst you to get 2.11 yr old to put his bloody clothes on

67 replies

Pruni · 03/11/2006 10:34

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spinningkittywheel · 05/11/2006 08:51

I think pruni, the difference between us is that is would resort to being physically forceful in certain circumstances.
I think also that you have to keep you feelings about the whole business well hidden. Your ds enjoys the emotions and frustraitons he causes(kids are so good at that). Any attention you pay to it, whether being angry, making it at game, shouting etc is too much attention. If you don't want to use any force then simply ignore, take him out barely dressed but don't refer to it if he mentions it. Soon he will get bored with the lack of reaction and then find something else to plague you with ( that's what kids do). he will also get too cold . Good luck.

Pruni · 05/11/2006 08:56

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WanderingTroll · 05/11/2006 09:04

First of all, much sympathy. How many of these have you tried?!

1.Set aside 3 days when you don't have to go out (you will need vast quantities of patience, dvds, wine and chocolate.)
When he's asleep, hide ALL his clothes.
Next morning open drawers etc and "Oh! Where have all your lovely clothes gone? They've gone away because you won't wear them. Oh what a shame."

2.Have you tried shopping for new and exciting clothes with him? Though hard to muster near orgasmic thrill at socks, I know.

3.What about ignoring him to the point that he's invisible when he's naked? Really, no food, drink, tv etc. Very mean but may be effective.

4.Try saying - "Mummy is very sad because you won't get dressed and she wants to go outside and go to the shops and the park/the bank and feed the ducks etc" Let him know you are sad and disappointed - children are people pleasers, this won't make him happy. If it comes to it, cry.

5.He's too young for some bribery, hence not giving a stuff - he needs to see it before it makes sense to him. ie - showing him the biscuit he can have when he's clothed may have more effect than telling him he can have a biscuit if he gets dressed. If he won't get dressed, you eat his biscuit.

These all make me sound very mean, but I feel like you are in 'Last resort' territory. Agree about not wanting him to be scared of you/anger thing. Asserting your physical strength over a child rarely a good thing imo, and I think constantly forcing him into clothes will make him angry with you. Not forcing him into clothes right thing to do, though blinking frustrating!

Good luck, Pruni.

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UCM · 05/11/2006 09:14

I sit on the floor and put one leg over DS 3.2, that way there are no bruises, you can get the bottom bits on. Then if you trap them with both legs in a sitting down position, you can get the top bits on. OK, so he goes mad at me for about 2 mins, but is fine as soon as I have finished. I think they hate getting dressed as it's boring.

Tickle · 05/11/2006 09:30

pmsl Troll at no.1 and no.3

They could work!

Pruni does he get himself undressed??

Cos you could put him in fresh comfy clothes at night after bath, let him sleep in them, then start from there in the morning. Of course this won't work if he is compulsive clothes shedder.

ds1 did this - nearly pulled all my hair out, but he did grow out of it Now just dd2 and ds2 to go through....

spinningkittywheel · 05/11/2006 09:45

So don't do it pruni. Just ignore him, that will work.
My children are mostly aquiescent, yes. But after having had a few I don't think it's simply luck, boundaries are set early and they are kept to, there is nothing brutal in my house.
I have also had some very difficult children who push those boundaries all the time and it is very tiring.
My kids aren't angels, but they know when they have stepped over the line.
As I said, good luck with it.

dueat44 · 05/11/2006 20:06

If you let him choose what to wear, would that work??

Elibean · 05/11/2006 22:43

Maybe I'm the only one who actually enjoys the games...but if I have time, its fun (for me). And easy.

But I can see they woudln't work for or with everyone: rather like the suggestions about just taking them out undressed (with clothes in bag). dd is often a nightmare about putting on sweater/coat etc until actually out of the house - then she suddenly becomes obedient

Also like the sound of 'you CANNOT get dressed this morning', might still work with dd (too young to suss it out). But risky...

Good luck in morning, Pruni...

ghosty · 05/11/2006 23:11

Haven't read all replies but we get DD dressed the minute she wakes up - out of bed, change nappy, clothes on .... If she fights I hold her down.
Can't be doing with 'she won't let me' stuff ... she hasn't got a choice ... I have to get out of the house to take DS to school by 8.15 and 2 days a week she goes to creche, the rest of the week we go straight on somewhere after the school drop off.
I am in charge after all.

Pruni · 06/11/2006 08:56

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prettymum · 06/11/2006 09:17

when dd ( 25 months) refuses to dress i just say ok fine and walk away to which she'll reply by insisting on having her clothes put on.

now i have ds (3 months), i'll tell her i'll dress him instead and she'll make no fuss in getting dressed!

blueshoes · 06/11/2006 09:23

well done, Pruni.

I find that dd needs to push me to my limit as well before going along happily the next day. She has always been strong-willed, that monkey

Elibean · 06/11/2006 10:16

Wahey, well done Pruni. I wonder if it worked better today because you were prepared and calm, rather than under pressure? Anyway, good!

Your turn now...or are you sitting in your room till you're ready...

Sobernow · 06/11/2006 11:19

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Pruni · 06/11/2006 17:44

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TheHighwayCod · 06/11/2006 17:48

[runi thats my kind of parenting
the game thing woudl only haev worked once or twice
this is the age to start putting oyur foot down abotu a lOT of htings ime

Pruni · 06/11/2006 18:40

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