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Need help, think baby number 3 is a no now.

2 replies

sugarplumfairy28 · 13/04/2015 12:28

I need to scream into a figurative pillow. Just a bit of background, we (husband, both my parents and our 2 children) emigrated last July to Germany. My husband suffers with Rapid cycling bipolar disorder.

Due to our circumstances, he had to take the first job that came up here, just to get an income coming in. We knew, planned and prepared for it not being a dream job or anything. Ironically despite being the half German one, my level of German makes me unemployable, and my skill set isn't that of my husbands which allowed him to get in with a company providing English services. I've never not had a job, and to be honest I feel like I'm stir crazy on a daily basis.

Anyway hubby has said his not happy in this job, but has done nothing about looking for another one. We had discussed having baby number 3 and even ttc last month, however all of a sudden I've become very very aware of how little he does around the house, by little I mean nothing. This weekend, I've been suffering with a broken, rotten and now infected wisdom tooth, which needless to say is beyond painful. He sent me to bed but has left the house an absolute mess, nothing has been done whatsoever. The children hadn't been given lunch and dinner was as late as 8pm. We currently have an ant problem, but the floor is covered in crumbs, sweet wrappers, to be honest it's disgusting. What gets me though, is it's nothing new, if I have to go shopping or something I come back to this. What's really got me is, is this is the rare occasion where I feel dreadful and could really do with some help. I got angry with him this morning, and his blaming it on the Bipolar, which puts me in a position where I can't judge him, blame him or be angry. Nothing about his actions are inline with any episode his had before. I have no idea what to do, I think baby number 3 is off the cards as he sees it as me doing everything, I'm worried about my marriage if this is his way of getting out of looking after the kids properly.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
moomoob · 13/04/2015 12:39

He sounds like a lazy b@*$%@# to me using his bipolar as an excuse. By the sounds of it your looking after 3 children already

sugarplumfairy28 · 13/04/2015 12:45

He is a naturally messy person anyway, but this sees like a whole new level of it. Just feel like he has left it all to me today because I can't go back to bed.

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