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Original poster

DS's sleep always sabotages the holidays

16 replies

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 08:35

Now I KNOW it's really the other way around and that it's the change in routine at holidays that causes my son's sleep to go to pot but I have had enough. DS does term time only nursery (due to my job and financial reasons) and whenever there's a holiday his sleep goes hideous and the holidays end up ruined because we're all tired and stressed out. We've had to completely abandon two holidays and thought staying at he for this one would help.
This time he keeps getting out of bed (we moved him with no problems a month ago) and screams at his door. We've tried putting him back to bed etc but nothing works.
We can't co sleep because he just wakes up more. We can't leave him to scream because of DD (5mo).
Last night he wouldn't settle til after 9 and then was up from 2-4. DD was up for most of the night with a fever. To top it off I was poorly too.
I'm not really after answers, I just want sympathy and reassurance that this will get better.
(I have PND and it always gets worse when DS's sleep goes off).

OP posts:

snice · 05/04/2015 08:43

How old is he? Is he screaming to get out of his room? Does he have a nightlight?

snice · 05/04/2015 08:43

Sorry-my sympathies btw it sounds awful

Original poster

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 09:06

He's 2.4 yo. He screams for us, often to come out of his room and go downstairs (we don't let him), he occasionally gets back into bed but then screams for his blankets to be put on. I'm sure he'll come through it eventually (well I'm not sure, but the rational part of my brain says that he always does), it's just the relentlessness of it. He can go for weeks going to bed without a murmur and sleeping without more than the odd very brief bit of reassurance to being a total nightmare. And it always happens in the holidays.
I'm actually seriously questioning why we had children. I love them but they make me so unhappy.

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Original poster

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 09:07

To be fair, they don't make me unhappy, just the fact that I don't seem to be able to cope with being a parent does.

OP posts:

MaybeDoctor · 05/04/2015 09:11

Sympathies. I found that the random, 'middle of the night completely alert and ready to get up for the day' waking was a feature of the toddler years, often after weeks of uninterrupted sleep.

Just a question, you mention blankets - is he warm enough? The temp dips quite a bit in the small hours and you might find that he needs to be a bit more cosy. Otherwise, it might just be developmental.

BakewellSlice · 05/04/2015 09:13

My sympathies, sounds awful.

I wasn't clear why you think this is happening at home (I can see why things might go wrong in a new location.)

wheresthelight · 05/04/2015 09:15

Op my dd does this when not at the childminder or when the dsc's are here and I totally understand the feeling like a rubbish parent bit (and trust me we aren't!!)

I have decided that going with the flow and the path of least resistance works, so when dd refuses to go to bed I just sit on the sofa with her, she's not allowed to play, we sit and cuddle and eventually she calms down and falls asleep and is out back in her bed. she has also suffered night terrors since she was about 8 months old but this only happens when her routine is altered. she is only 19 months so I have no idea how long it takes to grow out of it but it will happen (I hope) but you are a fab mummy and the fact he only does it when his normal routine is altered shows that

bonzo77 · 05/04/2015 09:19

Any chance of him going back in a cot? My ds2 is the same age and I cannot imagine him in a bed.

Original poster

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 09:24

Thank you all. I think its just one of those days (weeks).
I don't think he's cold - he has a sleeping bag. I think it's more of an attachment thing (like the bloody cars he insists on taking to bed). Also we've had the heating off all winter because the 'noises' frighten him.
Bakewell - I think it's because he's been out of nursery for the last week. I'm gutted because I was looking forward to doing so many lovely things. Off topic - your nn has made me hungry.

OP posts:

BakewellSlice · 05/04/2015 09:38

Clutching at straws: Do you think he's less tired so there's a possibility that getting him running about in the fresh air might help?

Also the one counter intuitive truth about sleep to me was that if there was a nap (or at least resting time at 2-3 age range) in the middle of the day, sleep is often better at night.

Sorry for you right now.

Original poster

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 09:58

I think it is partly the tiredness thing. We try to get him to do something active every day. He's refusing to nap aswell for the last few days. Who knows?!?

OP posts:

BakewellSlice · 05/04/2015 10:00

Exactly! Be kind to yourself.

peggyundercrackers · 05/04/2015 10:43

Sounds hard...

Although he's in a bag I would still try putting a blanket on, we do that with our dd, she asks for her blanket on when she goes to bed and once she's sleeping she pulls it right over her head, they are just light blankets so absolutely no danger to her.

Could he be getting back teeth in?

Is the room dark enough?

I would agree with the running about, now it's lighter at night we will start taking our de to the park just after 5.30 so she can run about and tire herself out.

wheresthelight · 05/04/2015 16:41

actually bakewell makes a very good point about perhaps he just isn't as tired. we have had the dsc's all week and as such some of the activities haven't been suitable for dd so she has had to have her pushchair and use it more than normal. as a result she hasn't been as tired. although that said she has spent today and yesterday racing round the garden and still hasn't slept so am guessing part of it is just pure bloodymindedness don't know where she gets that from about not wanting to miss out.

hang in there! you are doing a fab job

violator · 05/04/2015 16:46

My sympathies, if you're dealing with PND as well that's doubly hard.

All I can offer is my own experience, at 2.5 my DS was in a cot, in a sleeping bag and had a light duvet over him. We always used a blackout blind too.

And he got at least an hour runaround outside every day, whenever remotely possible.

I hope things improve for you soon.

Original poster

LosingNemo · 05/04/2015 21:08

Thank you all so much. DS's sleep has always been a trigger for my depression. I obsess about it. I'm much more relaxed about DD (who is a much better sleeper, so it's easier to be calm).

I had him doing laps in the garden, got him out in his trike and all sorts - it's paid off a bit I think.
I did actually get a nap out of DS today and bedtime only took an hour and a half. Which is an improvement. I'm off to bed shortly.
Thank you all again, I appreciate that you took the time to reply.

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