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Parenting

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Original poster

newborn crying when I lay her down

21 replies

nk1605 · 19/03/2015 19:31

my dd is 2 days old and every time I try to lay her down to sleep or lay her down for 2 seconds to do something she screams and cries until I pick her up again. She also wouldn't sleep last night unless she lay on my chest. The nurse told me to leave her in her crib and let her cry but she's just so young yet I didn't know if that was good for her? is it normal for newborns to need constant contact and am I right in giving her the constant contact?

she also screams whenever I try to change her nappy or wash her, I figure that is cos she's cold?

any advice would be brilliant as I'm a clueless first time mummy!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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FirstTimeMum23 · 19/03/2015 19:38

My daughter is only 6 weeks and the first couple of weeks all she wanted was to be on mine or my husbands chest and slept a lot - it's comforting for them to be so close when they're so little (I've learnt quickly) just keep her close and don't do anything else and demand people bring you food and drinks so you don't have to move and rest yourself as much as possible!

Sleepyhead from John Lewis was a lifesaver approx 10 days in for her to finally sleep!

HootyMcTooty · 19/03/2015 19:46

Congratulations on your baby girl!

Did you have any intervention during birth? With DD1 I had a ventouse delivery and they told me her head might hurt for a few weeks and she was just like that and I'm sure it was her head hurting.

She slept on us for the first couple of weeks, then would go in her Moses basket, but only on her tummy. She's nearly 3 now and has never slept on her back, but I wouldn't recommend it because of the SIDS risk. Most babies settle down eventually, I know lots of babies who were like this initially and settled down very quickly and she's still so very new. Keep trying and I'm sure she'll get there. Try putting a reassuring hand on her or rocking her in the crib. If that fails, maybe pick up for a cuddle and put her back once she's calmed down and keep repeating.

fluffybee · 19/03/2015 19:49

It's perfectly normal for them to comforted by contact - they have been cuddled up in the womb for nine months so it must feel odd being out in the world! We have a seven day old and he loves his sleepyhead as well, not cheap but money well spent.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

0-3 months old Babies & sleep Families General parenting

Springtimemama · 19/03/2015 19:49

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Elllimam · 19/03/2015 19:52

Maybe try a sling? It made all the difference when my wee klingon was a newborn.

Springtimemama · 19/03/2015 19:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

momtothree · 19/03/2015 20:04

Sorry but i have a different answer - your baby probably has the mussel at the top of the stomach open - dont panic this is common and closes at around 6 months - every time u lie them down stomach acid seeps out and gives them heartburn. DO NOT lie flat prop up on a cushion when changing put a rolled up towel under the mattress to keep head higher than stomach etc .... u will find they sleep ok in a car seat or lifted up pram. This us recognised in USA bit not UK ....Why? U will c a changed child in a few days when they catch up on some sleep.

BloomingOrBallooning · 19/03/2015 20:10

Keep her as close to you as you can. It's good for both of you. She probably won't relax for nappy changes for a couple of months, but all too soon she'll be wanting to take an interest in the wider world.

I agree with getting a good quality sling/carrier.

GuybrushThreepwoodMightyPirate · 19/03/2015 20:12

Totally normal, cuddle your baby as much as you want. If you start hallucinating through exhaustion then the sleepyheads and tilted cots recommended above are worth a shot. Also try swaddling and grobags.
Never ever ever feel guilty for cuddling your baby. Never ever ever feel guilty for needing to NOT cuddle them for a bit when you need to do something else!

BiscuitsofYum · 19/03/2015 20:12

Congratulations on your little one!

Don't worry its all normal. For the last 9 months she's been cuddled up tight in your womb being warm, fed and in constant contact. Now she's born, she's got tight clothing and nappies on and expected to sleep horizontal. If someone picked you up and made you sleep upside down in a tree im sure you'll be sad too! But it passes!
My ds wouldn't sleep in his basket for the first week, then with help from the swaddle he now sleeps.

Don't worry, its all new for both of you! Enjoy it as you can!

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 19/03/2015 20:13

That was shit advice from the nurse.

Good advice in this thread though so I won't repeat it :)

And congratulations!

(Ps, al first time mummies are clueless )

fieldfare · 19/03/2015 20:17

Have you tried swaddling her too?
Dd was like that until I learnt to swaddle her tightly.
Congratulations!

proceeding · 19/03/2015 20:22

Totally normal. DD1 wasn't like it, DD2 (now 18 months) is still a cuddle monster .

It's exhausting, but relax, breathe into it, and go with what she needs for the next few weeks. Hopefully you have someone to help bring you tea and food!

NickyEds · 19/03/2015 20:26

Awful advice from the nurse.

Ds slept on either me or dp for the first 10 days or so before he would be put into his moses basket for short periods. We took it in turns to sleep in 2 hour "shifts". I think that they really just need contact when they're so tiny. You're doing exactly the right thing

Pico2 · 19/03/2015 20:39

There is a massive disconnect between the advice given in books and by professionals and the reality of having a baby. Yes, the safest place for a baby to sleep is in a cot/ basket, on its back. Neither of my DDs did this reliably as newborns with DD2 being slightly better at it than DD1. The reality is that a lot of people end up cosleeping. If the alternative to carefully planned cosleeping is ending up exhausted and accidentally falling asleep with your baby on the sofa, then you are better off planning to cosleep.

OhisHOME · 19/03/2015 20:43

Highly recommend this article & buying a copy of the BabyCalm book by the same person [http://sarahockwell-smith.com/2012/11/04/the-fourth-trimester-aka-why-your-newborn-baby-is-only-happy-in-your-arms/]

also a Moby wrap would be perfect

Original poster

nk1605 · 19/03/2015 23:36

Thanks for the advice everyone!

OP posts:

soontobemumofthree · 19/03/2015 23:51

Congratulations! It was surprising to me when DS1 was born, how much time you have a baby physically on you when they are first born, but you get used to it, after a while!

Springtimemama · 20/03/2015 07:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EmmaOt · 20/03/2015 22:14

What crap advice from the nurse, your tiny baby needs your love, warmth, smell, voice. She has been 'cuddled' in you the last 9 months and can't understand why that has changed.
Google 'the fourth trimester' it really helped me understand my newborn a bit better.

Qwebec · 21/03/2015 20:24

A friend of mine had the same problem and it was bc the child was cold. They solved it by using a hot water bottle on the surfaces the baby was about to be layed down. I know a mother who would iron the sheets just before getting her children to bed...

Maybe worth a try?

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