I can't take any more.

[DeathWouldBeAWelcomeBreak]

My dd is only 2. She woke at 5am this morning and will still not go to sleep tonight. Apart from a short nap this afternoon she has been awake for sixteen hours today. She has eaten well, drank, has a clean nappy, has had paracetamol and Ibupofen. I have nothing left to try. She is just being naughty. This has been going on for weeks now and I am broken. I have a stressful job and I can't cope with life like this. I want to leave her and never come home again. I have tried everything. I have nothing left.

Have you got someone who could see to her for a bit so that you can go out and clear your head?

If you are at work all day, is she getting enough fuss and cuddles? No saying this to make you feel bad, just sone minor tweaking of your routine may help.

One thing I do doubt is that she's doing it to be naughty. She is still so little. Perhaps the No cry sleep solution for toddlers and preschoolers might help?

You sound very low. Total exhaustion is such a horrid feeling. Having to do a stressful job on top of looking after a toddler going at 100 miles per hour is so hard - I've been there so I can empathise. It gets better I PROMISE you.
Do you sleep in the same bed as her - can you cuddle up in bed with her so that you can fall asleep together?
Why are you giving her calpol and ibuprofen? Is she ill?
She is not naughty and I am sure deep down you know that.

Is she unwell (the paracetamol/ibuprofen)? Temperature/crying etc?

I feel for you
If you're sure there's nothing the matter, then controlled crying sounds like a good idea. Google the Jo Frost method, it's very gentle and worked wonders with mine.

chill my love!
Start at the very beginning.

1. What is the immediate problem?

From the sounds of it this is your 2yo not sleeping which in turn has made you tired and grumpy.

1. what is the ideal immediate solution?

I'm guessing that it's you both sleep well tonight

1. is this realistic?

Probably not...and understanding that might help you to deal with it. We all get frustrated when we want something now that doesn't happen. Aiming for a longer term goal might be more helpful.

Immediately all you can do are short term fixes that'll help you cope a bit better. Give yourself a break. have a cup of tea. A glass of wine. A cake something for you. Could you get a babysitter in to get away for a night just to help you deal with this a bit more fresh faced? Are you working? Could you take some time off again to be a bit kind to yourself? Although this all sounds trivial if you are frustrated then it's going to rub off on your 2yo and they'll pick up on it and it'll make the situation 10 times worse. Your dc is not doing this on purpose. I've never not slept to wind someone up. If I'm tired I'll sleep. The things that stop me are if I'm too alert, worried, upset, hungry, things on my mind etc. I'm guessing this is the same for children! so you getting frustrated will just make your dc frustrated too leading to a vicious cycle. Do you have a dp who can do the bedtime routine at all so your frustrations aren't rubbing off?

So why...I guess this is why you've posted wanting to know why they aren't sleeping! well anyone could give numbers of reasons and strategies to try. truth is you'll get more frustrated if these don't work immediately....but we have to do things 20 times before they become habbit. has anything changed in your 2yo life recently? has anything changed with you? how are other aspects of health/weight etc?

you can always phone your hv and speak through concerns with them.

my only piece of advice would be to bring back some love and joy just to remind yourself that things aren't all bad. can you do an activity you both love doing together tomorrow just to have a bit of you two time. Try and build plenty of it in so there are good times too.

Your child loves you without any shadow of a doubt. to them you are perfect. you are everything they need. you've got plenty to live for :)

Daytime naps are really important for nighttime sleep - I know you prob know this :(

She is likely overtired BLAH BLAH!

But it can be dealt with, research the Jo Frost method for age appropriate

I've given her medicine as I think she's teething her molars. You're right she's not really naughty. I'm just losing my patience and I don't like her very much atm. She goes through the whole bedtime routine without much fuss but when I try and put her down she asks for more or this and some of that etc. She's just stalling. I've tried pandering to her but it just delays the inevitable tantrums when I eventually leave her. I only work part-time and my dh works shifts so we spend lots of time with her. When we are both at work she is looked after by doting grandparents.

sorry, changed my name to start this thread I'm tired and emotional!

For now stop trying to get her to sleep. If she will be quiet in front of the TV, leave it on, go in another room and do something for yourself

Lovely post MrsCK.

I would think about dropping the nap actually. All 3 of my children dropped the daytime nap just after 2. If they had even 10 mins they be still awake at 930. No nap = 12 hours sleep in our house.

Bedtimes are so hard. The only thing i can say is to give her more cuddles, more books, more kisses, more stories. Cuddle her until she sleeps. She's not like that on purpose and she absolutely loves you. Put her favorite movie on and cuddle up on the sofa. it will pass...

She goes through the whole bedtime routine without much fuss but when I try and put her down she asks for more or this and some of that etc. She's just stalling. I've tried pandering to her but it just delays the inevitable tantrums when I eventually leave her.

I have a nearly 3 year old like this too! Its very very frustrating, I know

What works for us (sometimes!) is explaining what will happen next before each step. So "after we read a story its time to get in bed" then when in bed its "daddy will sit on the chair for 2 minutes, then he is going downstairs." DS is allowed to take a couple of books to bed to look at quietly if he doesn't want to sleep yet, but is told if he can't lay quietly I'll have to take the books back out. Obviously some nights are still hell, but these steps make it a bit easier sometimes!

Would a gro clock help for the early mornings? Hope she falls asleep soon for you