Does your 2.5 year old amuse themselves or need constant attention?

[milkyman]

My 2.5 needs constant attention and will never sit and play by himself. he drags me around to play - is this normal? my mum said he should be able to play on his own for a bit at this age.

Mine is good at amusing himself but i think both is normal. It depends on personality.

Was just about to type a reply and then realised you were the OP, Milkyman! of course my DS is the same as your son as they were clearly separated at birth...!

DS is 2.4 and incapable of playing by himself for longer than about 4 minutes. It's absolutely draining!

I asked the HV about it recently out of desperation and she pointed out that because he is in nursery 4 days a week whilst I am at work, he might be trying to desperately get his 'fill' of mummy's attention on the 3 days per week we spend together.

This makes sense to me and helped me accept the situation a bit (although didn't help much with the mummy guilt I am feeling about working...!).

I am 20 weeks pregnant though and have realised that I need to try and encourage/train him to entertain himself a bit fairly sharpish.

So for the last week on the Hv advice I have broken down my 'playtime' with him into little 15 minute blocks.

So I play with him, full on give him my attention doing whatever he wants (usually playing interminable imaginary games with his dolls house and farm animals on the floor) for 15 mins. I time it on my watch.

Then I say, with 2 mins left, "DS I can play for 2 more mins/2 more games of hungry hippos/I will finish this drawing and then I need to go and do for a few mins ok? Then I will play again later".

Then when the 15 mins is up I say, all businesslike:

"Right im off to dry my hair/hang out the laundry/Hoover the stairs/whatever - I will be back soon".

And just walk out the room and leave him to it.

Maybe around 40% of the time he will follow me and moan /cry but I just keep ignoring him, get in with task and say: "I am drying my hair now DS. I will play again in a minute."

As the days have gone by he seems to be 'getting the hint' that sometimes mummy has things to do for a few minutes. And he generally tends to just wander off and do something on his own.

And I make a big fuss of him for 'playing nicely like a big boy' when my chore is finished.

And then I do go back and play with him again, so he knows I am not fibbing and will be back as promised.

Next week, I am hoping to expand the list of 'jobs' that I pop off to do, to include:

• mummy is having a sit down and a cuppa for 10 mins
• mummy is watching the news headlines
• mummy is reading a few pages of her magazine

Ha ha - well. I can dream, right.?!

Maybe something similar might work with your DS??

Also - at the moment I am doing 'tasks' that last 10 mins max...I am hoping to drag this out a bit over the coming months.

Fwiw I think some kids are just like this.

If you've not had a kid like this my post probably sounds like bonkers overkill.

But those of us with a very needy child are totally on the same page!

Mine will but is a neglected second child-my first didn't. He will eventually.

Mine does but had only just started last couple weeks. He's 2.7yo

I think it mostly has to do with personality.

My 5 year old daughter has never been good at amusing herself, while my 2 and a half year old son can keep himself busy for ages.

Mine will sometimes play alone but then she wants me to join in. She's an only child and I can only see it getting worse as she gets older....

Just wondering g how much you play with you kids? I have a 6 and 3 year old and feel like that I play with them too much and they look to me for ideas on what to do or spend time. It's day 2 of half term and they are driving me crazy. I just want to get a few jobs done and they want my constant input or the telly! Maybe I'm just venting but wondering how/what your kids do and play