2 under 2 or almost 2 under 1 - any experiences?

[PerryPears]

It's early days but when DC2 is born, DS1 is going to be almost 14 months. We wanted a small age gap but I'm thinking more about how this is going to work day to day.

Any experiences and tips appreciated about anything but I'm wondering in particular:

• how do you get anywhere? Those double buggies look too big for our front door for a start
• how do you entertain both each day after the newborn is out of the eat/sleep stage?

We know it'll be absolute chaos for a few years but hopefully will be easier as they get older

15 month gap here. We didn't bother with a double buggy. Just single and sling and board in combo depending on where/ when/ age. Locally we often just put eldest on reins and baby in sling so pram free

We always just went were eldest liked when youngest in baby stage and youngest just tagged along.

Both nap at home same time after lunch asap. You can nap also. All other naps baby had wherever

Get eldest to walk a lot in parks/ woods. Fresh air, baby falls asleep, you and eldest get fresh air, eldest in knackered and sleeps. We did x2 walks a day ( kinda like a Labrador!)

15 month gap (followed by a 19 month gap). I had two rules:

1. We went out for a walk every day - even if it was only to the newsagents.
2. DC1's bedtime was sacrosanct - I'd overfeed DC2, and when they fell asleep I'd place them in a warm, comfortable nest on the living room floor (time varied according to when DC2 was settled). I then took DC1 upstairs and bathed them, before reading a bedtime story. Nine days out of 10, DC2 would sleep through - but even if they cried I continued with DC1's bedtime. I'd just choose a shorter story or read faster....

It's going to be hard work - but you'll find DC1 won't really be jealous (after a couple of weeks they'll have forgotten what it's like not to have to share you). And by the time DC2 is six months old, DC1 and DC2 will already be a team. My two eldest are now 14 and 13.... and despite being different sexes, and going to different schools are very close indeed.

A friend had three under 1. She coped by altering her mindset. Yes this is going to be hard work and I can't change . Slings saved her sanity. Acknowledging house wouldnt be a showroom and lots of fresh air.

Oh and that's we got a cleaner!

I have two under 18 months (14 month gap)

I got out everyday. That means loading two in the car, sorting car seats etc. I keep the buggy in the boot and have a bag already packed in the passenger seat with spare clothes wipes and nappies.

This is how we work it. DH does the night feeds thur,fri and sat.. I do the rest. I batch cook so saves me an hour and now bath them instead of fussing over dinner, stopping toddler from climbing into a hot oven. I don't want to eat batch cook food everynight so If I am cooking a stir fry, bung toddler in the high chair and he feeds himself some steamed veg and snacks.

Phil and teds sport buggy. life saver

I have been struggling. I haven't got dressed some days in the past so new rule. Up teeth brushed, tiny splodge of make up and perfume and actually get dressed!! I feel so much better.

I also make time for myself and hit the gym three nights a week once dh comes in. after gym I get the luxury of a hot shower in peace. blowdry my hair properly. shave legs apply tan. I am not a diva but I was getting a bit depressed covered in sick and in dirty clothes and felt horrible in myself.

I make sure toddler naps everyday and in that time I get a coffee and mumset (this is my break) and do tummy time with baby. Then whizz around and clean and if I get time prep something for dinner for myself and sort dinner for dh.

It is honestly ok. you sometimes need to stick a broomstick up your arse and fly around the house but what the hell... its only for a couple of years and I cant wait to get back to work for a hot coffee !!

Snap.

I am pregnant with No2 and wondering the same thing!

I was also wondering how it would work with meal times! I think I may have to resort to feeding them both in the garden.

And how do you do bath routine? Do you bath them together? Separately?

What do you do if baby wants to clusterfeed around DC1's bed time!?!

V impressed with MrsSteddy's exercise routine! Good work!

I always fed/ bathed/ etc at the same time. By 15months eldest could eat by himself so would give him food, and feed baby at same time.
Bath together, taking baby out and getting changed on bathroom floor whilst eldest played.
Bed would take baby and feed whilst reading eldest bedtime story. Then kiss eldest goodnight, and take baby into living room and settle to sleep also. Taking baby to bed with us when we went

They still eat/ sleep/ bath together now at almost 4 and 5

You just get on with it because you have to.

I have a 15 month age gap, and you get a routine on the go you'll find out what works and what doesn't and do that. In this house dp puts dc1 one down because he's a wee rascal who won't sleep for me and I put down dc2 if dp is working I make sure I keep dc1 up, no naps and then bath them both and put them both to bed.

I do need to get dinner time down though but I'm working on getting my freezer fill of batch cooking.

My double buggy fits through the front door but not the back just load them in and go. Most of them are about the width of a wheel chair and although in some places it is difficult mostly due to over filled isles. I still manage.

full* and my buggy is an out n about side by side

Two under Two here -19 month gap. DD in nursery still which saves sanity. Otherwise you just cope. DD is trying to stop her nap but I push bedtime back instead as I need the break in the middle of the day to regroup. Planned activities - soft play/group, library, playdough, duplo etc. Food is basic - lots of jacket potatoes, hummus etc. We have builders in at the moment so house is a tip!

I'm due my baby girl in july and ds will be 18/19 months. I have been thinking about this a lot. I just can't imagine how it's all going to work. I spent literally hours on end bf/cluster feeding ds and am now thinking bf might be the first casualty. Sorry to hijack your thread op but I also want to know how you get stuff done! Can you ever leave your older one with the baby(ds used to love his baby gym but I can't see how it would work)?? Does the second just fit in??

Thanks for all the tips. I guess it'll work because it just has to. DS1 is in a good bedtime routine already but daytime naps are a bit of a challenge at the moment. I've got time to hopefully get him into a good routine in the day before #2 arrives though.

For those of you that work, how did your work take it that you were having another so soon? I'm currently on mat leave and not looking forward to telling them, although I know legally they'll just have to deal with it.

I am due in July too, when DS will be 20 months.

Also very nervous about the feeding - DS1 took 90 minutes per feed for months, and cluster fed most days 5pm to 8pm. No idea how I can do that unless someone else puts DS1 to bed every night and I would hate to miss that time with him. A little but nervous!

I just keep saying "It will be fine" over and over at the minute . It doesn't help with people constantly going "How on earth will you cope??? HOW???"

I found the dummy a lifesaver when DC2 was grizzly in the early evening and DH used to take over DC1 when he came in. I also sat in bed feeding DC2 whilst Dc1 and I read a book and he drank his milk. He loved that time and still does 5 months in.