Please help, thinking of retaking third year at uni

[Wowser20]

Hi everyone

I'm new to Mumsnet.

My head is all over the place at the moment.

I am in my final year at university and I feel like giving up. My daughter, 5, was recently diagnosed with severe learning difficulties, she cannot talk, still has delays In her walking and she's currently going through lots of genetic assessments and having to attend her therapy classes.

My doctor has recently diagnosed me with depression, which I'm currently taking anti- depressants with, but not helping to my effect.

I only have a couple of months left to finish, but I'm so behind in my work, it's ridiculous, and I don't want to get a bad grade, even though I know I can do better. Plus I sadly will need a masters for the job I want to do and for my course you need at least a 2.1.

I would love to take a gap and return the next academic year. But since having DD at age 16, I've been in education throughout her life and I don't want to miss out on her life as much as I've already have, since if I choose to graduate the following year, she'll be near 7.

But then again, I could use my gap to focus solely on her needs. Plus I am sorting out her statement of special needs as well as her special school placement.

What should I do?

Or maybe I should give up on university.

Don't give up. You have done so well so far. Sorry for the difficult time you are going through. If taking a gap year is an option I'd do it. I remember being at uni and wanting to finish as soon as possible, almost feeling life only begins after you finish but there is no rush, there really isn't. Take one challenge at a time. X

Take the gap year and focus on your Dd now. Sounds like she needs you now.

I'm a student and I have a DS with SN. You really need to take a year off (at least) to focus on your DD's needs. I ended up taking two years out of uni but it was worth it. It's exhausting dealing with all the appointments, statements and funding, but it's worth taking the time to do it properly. There's no rush to graduate quickly, especially as you are so young yourself.

I hope you've sorted out getting DLA for her, it sounds like she has high enough needs for it. Then you can qualify for carers allowance and income support and you won't be under pressure to search for work. I went back to finish my degree on a part time basis and that meant I could continue to get benefits. It has taken longer this way but my DS is thriving and is in the right placement for him, and accessing therapies and respite that other parents have not managed to get because they're trying to juggle too much.