To dummy or not to dummy- that is the question!??!!!!

[mumchez]

Hello all, having a bit of a dilemma! I am in two minds wether to give my dd2, aged 4.5 weeks, a dummy or not??
DD1 did not have one, but the reasons for why i was thiking for dd2 is that she seems to enjoy 'suckling' from me and like today, she has been very sensitive and the only thing that keeps her content is having her 'suckling'!! This is not very practical for me with a busy two yr old wanting to play, get my attention etc. and of course the 101 things running a house demands!!
Now my reservations are that i dont want my daughter to become reliant on it, and for example spit it out during sleep causing herself to wake! Has this worked for anyone else as im feeling a little stuck as what to do????

try a newborn dummy and see how it goes they do grow out of them eventually and if it gives them comfort so be it.

I'm with mummy if they want to suck and they get comfort out of it then why not. Ds1 finished with his dummy at about 7 months and ds2 likes it when teething. It gives them great pleasure to suck, and a dummy gives you a well deserved break!

I was anti- dh got ds on at 2 wks when he was bored of having ds suck his finger for an hour at a time. Boy is now 7 m/o and has gone thro phases of useing a dummy at beddtime/nap time and not. For us it's something that lives in teh cot and isn't used any other time. Once ds found his thumb he had the perfect portable soother for himself, but at night he finds his thumb a bit exciting!
In the early days we did have to go and "find " it for him a few times each evening as he was settleing to sleep, now its rare to have to do that.
Now hes got teeth I far prefer him having a dummy to suck and chew on nights when hes cutting a tooth than his chewing my finger or boob.

If it comforts her and gives you some space then why not? As for spitting out when asleep get half a dozen for during the night and then look for the spit out ones in the morning

I used one reluctantly for my DD at about 5 weeks and it transformed our lives! We always took it out after she'd fallen asleep at night and she grew out of it after a couple of months. It gave us some much-needed rest when we were all exhausted and never became a problem.

We used one for that very reason with ours. Once he got a bit older we just restricted it to sleep times and by 18mths we dropped it. I'd go with it and see how it goes.

I'm with everyone here - I use a dummy with my ds who is 8 weeks old. He doesn't have it all the time but it is a life saver when he is just grumpy and needs a bit of comfort. He tends to spit it out as he is falling asleep anyway so doesn't miss it.

I can understand the feeling against them if a)it causes you more bother when they are dependant on it or b)they use them when they have teeth as it isn't good for them but on many of these threads people seem to regard dummies as the spawn of satan. I don't understand why - if they work for your child and help calm them and send them to sleep, what exactly is the problem. Can anyone enlighten me?

When I was a baby I slept with a dummy, and in a funny way I still do.

I think people forget that for a newborn, they have the natural urge/need to suckle and there's only so much of that they can do on you which is why a dummy is so beneficial!!!! Having said that, I don't agree with allowing a child to have a dummy when they're 5 and I htink that's where prejuidices come in. One person did get a bit funny with me as they viewed it as laziness i.e you're using it as you can't be bothered to comfort your child yourself which used to really pee me off!!! We always said that we would allow ds to have it up to 2 and then try and remove it. he has a blankie and fave bear now to rely on so he doesn't need it anymore!!!

def go with the dummy.brilliant invention! my eldest now 12 had his till he was 4, youngest now 2 has one. mainly for comfort and sleeping,i tell him to take it out when hes talking or playing. hes just learnt to say "dubby"

I hated the idea, thought they were horrible, but a lady in a shop gave me a packet, which I grudgingly accepted with no intention of using. Then when DD was about 2 weeks old, we tried it, and it has been our salvation! She only has it at sleep times, and she did go through a stage of waking in the night and not being able to get back to sleep without it. A friend of mine decided to go cold turkey with her LOs dummy and had three rough nights sleep, but he's completely over it now!

woa- thanks for all the responses!!
where can u get a 'newborn dummy' from?? are these different to regular dummies????
i am thinking of getting one tomorrow, my dd2 seems to have hit a colic mood the last couple of days & i just find it impossible to settle her without my chest or putting her in the pram!!!!
i too was anit dummy, spawn of the devil etc., but actually if it means an hour of peace, sounding good to me

The newborn ones have a smaller teat to enable it to fit better to their mouths I guess. We used the dummies by Tomme Tipee - they laid flat on the mouth to almost resemble your breast. Not sure if that's really tru but ds seemed ot prefer them to normal dummies.

thanks count- looks like a trip out 2moro 4 a dummy!! im hopinh it will bring some much needed relief! although much to my mothers disapproval!!!!

Ah don't worry, you've got to do whats best for all of you remember!!

Hi, I was feeling the same about giving dd2 and ds3 dummies as I didn't want them to be reliant on them.I read a book which said that from 3-4 months onwards is the time they start becoming attatched to things. I happily gave them a dummy, but only when necessary to settle them. By about 12 weeks I found they needed them less. By 14 they were settling themselves. I did introduce another means of comfort eg ,blanket,comfort toy etc .