So I just broke down in Sainsbury's...

[Babytalkobsession]

I don't know what's the matter with me. In the workplace I'm in control, assertive and confident. I've never cried at work. I just get on with it and have a reasonably stressful job.

But today (4th day on my own with DS as DH is away) I just couldn't keep my shit together and hold back the tears. I bloody hope no one I know saw me.

Does anyone else find this parenting lark relentless? It's exhausting, repetitive and constant! DS (15 months) refused to stay in the trolley, arching back, screaming etc so I got him out, tried to carry him on my hip (fucking impossible when we're both wearing waterproofs - like carrying a thrashing slippery octopus), I let him walk a bit, had to fetch him out of the warehouse... Just utterly disastrous. I think it's was the final straw after a long whingey weekend. He's had diorreha too so it's been a pretty full on weekend to be on my own. Every nappy has been a full outfit change...

I don't get why I'm finding it so hard though. Everyone else seems to love being a parent. He's actually slept through this week, after a year of awful sleep so I can't even blame lack of sleep..

He is awesome, don't get me wrong, I just struggle with too long on my own with him!

Am I the only one?

Nope, I want to sail through todderhood like a serene swan but I spend most of my life getting flustered, running after 17 months old DS and apologising to people! My best tip is to do the shopping online and try to remember we've all been there (and some of us still are!). I'm afraid I do like this stage though, hated hated hated the baby stage, it's definitely horses for courses!

Aah some days are like that. I bet he is a bit trickier to deal with if he is feeling poorly. Perhaps an early night for him, followed by some or all of the following for you:
Chocolate/wine/nice dinner/hot bubble bath/good book/telly/chat on phone.

Internet shopping has been my saviour!

Ha! DEFINITELY not alone!!

I had a little old man shuffle up to me and press a £2 coin into my hand in Aldi & said to me "here, buy him something to shut him up"
He was climbing out, screaming, throwing his wellies at people passing by, total nightmare.

I could weep on an hourly basis.

Like you, I am a professional, very stoic, not a lot bothers me or gets to me.

Good grief this is the hardest job EVER.

Oh it is tough isn't it. I think we've all had days like that, sometimes it feels like it's rare not to have a day like that! In the nicest possible way though, don't make it so hard for yourself. 15mos is young enough to ignore their demands, if they want to get out the trolley that's tough because you just know they're too young to understand they need to walk nicely with you round tht shop. If they scream their head off the rest of the way round then they scream. It won't harm them, you can whizz round and grab the last few bits, someone will probably let you skip ahead in the queue and then you're out of there and it's over. Chances are they wouldn't scream all the way round anyway, they're pretty easy to distract at that age. I have fond memories of pushing the trolley round tescos one Xmas with DD screaming and me trying to distract her by loudly squawking along to the Xmas music that was playing. Aisles cleared for us like the Red Sea parting

It does get easier, and you learn to pick your battles. Hang on in there OP

Hi Babytalk, it is relentless isn't it?
I think we all have these moments, I could have written your post! On Friday I couldn't even look at my three after the walk home from school. We all sat in silence watching Fireman Sam as I tried to come to terms with the horror of the previous hour!
Saintsbury's ( anecdotally) does seem to be the spot if choice for lots of toddlers I know to lose it. You are not alone.

Oh, we've all been there. FWIW, I would have kept him in the trolley whilst plying with snacks and making apologetic faces at those closest. People generally understand.

It's hard, it really is. I find this time of year a real low (feeling pretty wiped out and low on reserves myself). Soon it will be lighter, and drier, and everyone can be outside more.

Parenting a toddler is incredibly hard. Everyone you know seems to love being a parent and they probably do, most of the time but not all of the time. I think maybe that you need to massively reduce your expectations - your DH is away and your DS is low level Ill with a tummy bug. For the next few days Internet shop, watch some CBeebies (won't do him any harm, may save your sanity) read some books together and take it very, very easy. Do you both need a PJ day?

I've had some of my worst patenting moments in supermarkets and have left in tears on numerous occasions.

I'm often on awe of children who sit nicely on the trolly who aren't trying to scream and wriggle free/jump out/grap things off shelves or scream at the top of their voice for a NAAAAANA once theyve been spotted.

Praise be for online shopping

Yep, I've abandoned a trolley in the past, almost in tears, apologised to a shop assistant and left, writing it off as a bad trip out. Thrashing slippery octopus sounds about right too.

Everyone has bad days, and illness makes life that much harder. This is why chocolate and gin were invented.

I hated parenting a toddler. Absolutely hated it.

I roared at my ds in the street today as I told him he couldn't climb a wall which he then proceeded to do. It wasn't my finest moment. Shit happens. What can you do.

Nope, you are not alone. My DH works hundreds of miles away most weeks, and some are harder than others. Our DS is 8 months, crawling, climbing and a total handful - he is fantastic, but it's so exhausting sometimes! We also live up 4 flights of stairs, so getting out of the house is always a major effort. Add in the d&v bug he's just recovered from, and I could have wept in Sainsburys too. You are most definitely not alone!

Also, if you're finally getting decent sleep after 12+ months of rubbish I firmly believe your body releases hidden reserves of tiredness, we definitely feel worse after a couple of unbroken nights!

That sounds really tough, give yourself a break! Anyone that can watch ds for an hour while you have a cup of tea or bath?

My ds is similar age and has had diarrhoea bugs twice this winter, I know what you mean about every nappy being a full outfit change. It's utterly relentless and actually quite physical work especially given your ds prob doesn't like being dressed and undressed multiple times a day.

Hope your dh is home soon so you get some time off.

jimijack I am both and at the old man telling you to buy something to shut your DS up!

OP everyone has days where it all feels like too much. Sleep deprivation is a massive factor and even one week where you DS has slept doesn't really balance out the months where he hasn't.

Sometimes I think it's harder if you're used to being in control at work because it's absolutely impossible to control your life with a DC. You can't control if you sleep; if they sleep; if they're going to be in a good mood; if they're going to be ill. It's an ongoing lesson in thwarted planning! I could risk-assess an event for hundreds to the umpteenth degree so everything went smoothly but tbh when DS was little, I couldn't even have imagined the ways in which my plan for the day would fuck up. Cut yourself some slack. Do online shopping seriously it is much easier and when your DS is ill reduce your expectations to the bare minimum

I didn't even manage to get the pushchair into our toddler group before bursting into tears. I'd held it together for the weekend and thought I was fine. mISTAKE!
Even when they are on top form Sainso can be a trial. My son reminded me to buy poopoo in every aisle last weekend. Every single f@cking aisle. Loudly.

I'm feeling your pains man except mines 8. . SN, big and strong and has the ability to make sure I can't walk for a day if I turn my back at a crucial moment in a meltdown. God help me in the teenage years

tomorrow is another day and a big glass of something when they are in bed can help

We've all been there. I remember trying to leave a tesco store with trolley full once and holding a screaming, wriggling, kicking toddler at same time (I could not manoeuvre him into trolley seat). I swear I could have cried. Thankfully a lovely trolley guy came over to me, offered to push the trolley to the car and then loaded my boot and took trolley away so I could wrestle toddler into car seat. I could have hugged him (trolley chap not said toddler). I emailed store later to say thank you to him

I think it only starts to get easier when: they can go to the toilet by themselves; can get in a car seat by themselves; can sit at the table by themselves; can feed themselves in a civilised manner and don't have tantrums at the slightest bloody thing.

So you're in the hardest phase. It'll get better....eventually. Sorry I can't be more positive but I also found it all incredibly difficult, and DH and I were stupid enough to have three under four.

You'll feel so much better when your DH gets back.

We all have days like that. You are not alone

Parenting babies / toddlers = most relentless job ever.

Thanks everyone, your comments have helped no end. Cbeebies is on & I've polished off the choc buttons I bought to get through the checkout! Roll on 7pm for

Usually a couple of crackers & he's fine but I guess being a bit poorly was too much. I just had to get out of the house! Swimming & soft play were out thanks to his runny bum (absolutely fine in himself, think it's teething actually) and it's been pissing down all day so Sainburys seemed a good idea

I agree about the sleep, if anything I feel worse now I've got used to sleeping again!

It's all worth it though, at least this age they can be charming, affectionate and hilarious as well as demanding

You're all brilliant

KatyN - that's hilarious, sorry.

I have been known to pick up a toy at the beginning of the shop not the slightest inclination of buying it and abandoning it at the checkout in the cat food

God sorry KatyN just the poopoo shopping list. Not the breakdown. That's never funny.

An elderly couple once kindly tried to help me get Ds into the trolley at sainsburys, he was flailing and writhing and kicked the poor man. I was absolutely mortified, cried,apologised and just packed Ds into the car and went home!