how can i give my 8 year old some privacy when she shares her room?

[sanchpanch]

i am a lone parent with 2 girls age 8 and 3 they share a room as we only have 2 bedrooms, (which we are grateful for!!!)

8 year old loves being in her room and doing her own thing until 3 year old gatecrashes and causes havoc,

i have thought about giving them a room each and i sleep downstairs, but i think 3 year old would still want to gatecrash her sister's room, but at least then i could saw no cause at the moment i cant because it is both of there's room..

the room is to small to split in 2,

the house is housing association and i am sure they wouldnt rehouse us as i am sure there are people worse off than us!!

the constant arguements are getting to me,

any advice appreciated

I would move some toys downstairs for the younger one to let the older one have some time alone if she wanted it. And if she wants some physcal privacy when they are together, how about a screen to go round her bed?

Can you arrange for the 3yo to be downstairs doing something else while the 8yo is upstairs playing?
And you can say no at the moment. You can say no, your sister is playing and you can go up when she is done. Also, encourage your 8yo to play games that the 3yo can join in with occasionally. It won't be long before the 3yo grows up a bit and doesn't always wreck 8yo games. I have a 10, 8 and 6yo sharing a room and they have done for 3 years. Their 15yo and 11yo sisters share a room,too.

thanks i have got them bunkbeds so the 8 year old tends to put her special things up there,

We have bunkbeds,too. Something you might want to think about (you might already have done anyway) is to get your 8yo a cupboard that she can lock in some way so that anything special she has can be put away safely. Ours have had special stuff on their beds where they thought it would be safe(even the top bunk) and come to get it later only to find that our 3yo has pulled it to pieces/written all over it/lost it/etc. It causes no end of problems. So a cupboard that closes with a tight catch or lock could save some heartache.

yes good idea thanks,

there wardrobe has crashed to the ground today, so in planning a new one i will use this idea

I shared a room with my PITA little bro till I was 12. we had a cupboard and book case each facing opposite ways that worked as a room divider.I had the "inner section", I had a desk light so could have my light on later than him. sounds like your rooms are too small for that to work but...random ideas
-how about a rope ladder to the top bunk so she can pull it up after herself and little sis can't get up there.
-curtains round the top bunk and a wall mounted light( you can get battery opped ones), so she can read or draw in peace when younger sis is in bed.
-some locakable cupbard space, but you keep the spare key in case she loses hers.

• a roll top desk, so she can shut (and lock) away homework or things shes working on with out having to clear up totally.

My kids share rooms, I gave them each a shelf mounted high so the little ones can't get it and also a special drawer. THey can place their things they don't want touched there. Also, I let one go in my room and shut the door and keep the others other for an hour of private time. Letting your daughter know you understand and will help her find some private time really helps.

I've only scanned the thread, so don't know if someone else has mentioned this, but what about a screen? You know, those folding ones? You get get really pretty ones (could try ebay?) Would give a little bit of division in the room, without being too bulky.

For us the trouble with a screen is that it would take up valuable room without any real purpose. We don't really have a lot of room left in the bedroom once the beds are in and with bunk beds, again, the screen doesn't really have a purpose. I can see how it would be worthwhile if 2 different sex older children shared a room in which case it would provide privacy.