Please can anyone help with discipline tricks?!

[GoodSouls]

So after another day when I have ended up shouting at my 2 DS I feel so sad that I can't seem to find an effective way to discipline them-nothing strict-I just want them to listen when I ask something of them, they are 7 and 3, any ideas?

I highly recommend the book by Gina Ford about taking your toddler to become a confident child. I raised by two on this book and swear by it.

The other thing I swear by is the naughty step- for how thjis works just see this: www.supernanny.co.uk/Advice/-/Parenting-Skills/-/Discipline-and-Reward/Make-the-Naughty-Step-Work-for-You.aspx

Its easy to feel guilty about disciplining your children but its so true that you have to be cruel to be kind.

Smiley face on a chart every time they listen to you the first time. Sad face if you have to say it twice. Work out what a reward would be and how many smiles they need. Talk this through with them. Use lots of praise for good things and a glitter time out shaker for negative behaviour.

Whenever I end up shouting (more than I would like) I do find I have probably let myself get into the habit of not really following through on consequences. Unfortunately the way we are wired if we get away with something occasionally we are far, far more likely to keep trying it on. My kids develop selective hearing but I do find that a couple of days of "well you weren't listening so now you can't do X or can't have Y" and following through on it works wonders! Sometimes it's a pain to follow through on stuff though.

Basic principles are to be consistent, clear and fair.

Try to use natural consequences wherever possible so that the consequence of their behaviour teaches them something about what they did.

Praise and thank them whenever they do things you want to see more of. This can be tiny things like stepping over a toy on the floor rather than walking on it. Children find it really helpful to hear what they are doing right more than what they are doing wrong.

If you give them a consequence, stick with it. Don't ever look for excuses to let them off.

Communication is really important. Acknowledge their feelings and your own to help them understand their own emotions and the effect of their behaviour on yours.

Thanks, I think I need to be firmer with consequences. Must try harder!!