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Original poster

That's it. End of breastfeeding

19 replies

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 19:16

DS has finally stopped breast feeding at 2y5m. Self weaned mostly with very gentle encouragement at the end. I never intended to bf so long but DS had other ideas.

Feels really strange and bizarre. I'm a confusing mix of relieved and sad. I wanted to stop but was waiting for him to be ready. He was always very reliant on breast feeding from day one. I just feel all weird about it. Can't talk to friends or family as they all thought I stopped ages ago and I didn't correct them.

How did other people feel at the end of breastfeeding?

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BentleyBelly · 07/12/2014 19:25

Devastated! My daughter self weaned at 13 months. I wasn't ready at all and still miss it 2 months on. You did so well going for so long, you should be really proud.

northernlurker · 07/12/2014 19:27

Relieved and sad is a totally sensible way to feel. I felt like that with dd3. Partly because I knew she was my last baby so that was reall, really it. It's a precious experience but at some point you ae going to come to the end of it because your child is growing and you get to do new stuff with them. So yes feeling sad is perfectly reasonable but don't let it dominate your feelings. There's lots to be glad and happy about too. And chuck out the nursing bras or you'll still be wearing them n 3 years time!

DefiniteMaybe · 07/12/2014 19:28

I felt elated at first. I cold turkey weaned dd at 2 years 4 months after a night of her waking to feed every 30mins. It was a lot easier than I thought. About a week later the devastation hit but then I got pregnant and am now bf again

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Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 19:30

Thanks, I feel a bit bereft even though I wanted to stop. 13 months is a good long time too. They do seem to decide for themselves, don't they. I realised DS was born with a certain set of ideas!

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Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 19:32

Ah just seen other replies. Yes DS is my one and only baby so this is it for me too. I think that is part of it. Part of me is really happy that we are through it and moving on to him being a little boy instead of a baby.

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pasbeaucoupdegendarme · 07/12/2014 19:43

My dd stopped (not really self weaning, it was very much encouraged owing to work commitments) at 18mo. I felt exactly as you feel, and still sometimes (10 months on) I miss that special moment just before bed. But mostly now I look at her and wonder how I did it!!

The worst bit for me, actually, was about 4 weeks after she stopped and she got a sick bug. I knew I still had plenty of milk around so I offered her a boob, but she looked at me as though I was crazy and just screamed "No like it!!! No like it!!" I couldn't believe how quickly she'd forgotten, and I felt a bit put out, tbh!

Azquilith · 07/12/2014 19:50

Absolutely delighted to get my boobs back. Sad that I might lose that closeness, but he's still a Mummy's boy, and now I know he wants cuddles for me, not boob. To be honest I probably fed him for more than he was interested anyway.

northernlurker · 07/12/2014 19:51

The thing is when you've fed them that long and given up partly with your impetus and partly with theirs (which was the case with me - she was getting less and less in to it and I was ready to think it was time) you really have put a lot in to it and it's possible to see it as a whole stage in itself. You gave it your best effort, well done. Now he's grown beyond it - that's something totally beyond your control or will.

Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 19:54

pasbeau at your DD making you feel like a crazy boob lady

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vichill · 07/12/2014 19:54

Dd is currently self weaning as I'm 16 weeks pregnant. I feel like I'm cheating on her and guilty my body and boobs are prioritising the new baby. I never knew a bfing relationship could be so intense and complex. Oh yes and once the milk dried up she has succumbed to all sorts of bugs...making me feel even worse.

JuanFernandezTitTyrant · 07/12/2014 19:54

I have stopped tonight. I had forcibly, but gradually, reduced DS (13 months) to bedtime only, but we're having an absolute nightmare at bedtime at the moment and its not helping. He's been biting hard and kneading my boobs as well so I think he's not getting anything and enough is enough. I feel like I have been held hostage for 13 months, complete with Stockholm syndrome when I thought about stopping.

Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 19:57

Yes I'm pleased to have my boobs back. Do they ever firm up again or are they ruined forever?

It's just such an end of an era. At times I was so ready for him to stop and yet I feel a bit shocked. Pleased yet shocked.

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hissingcat · 07/12/2014 19:59

I felt bereft when dd stopped at 18 months and for a week or two after I felt like I needed wanted another baby.
I can only assume these feelings were hormonal. I am very glad I didn't have another baby

Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 20:00

Don't feel guilty vic. You've done great and she would have succumbed to plenty of colds. It is runny nose season

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GingerSkin · 07/12/2014 20:04

Completely normal to mourn it.

I was encouraged to treat myself with a gift - and I did, a nice Bose Bluetooth speaker, which, when I use now, reminds me of the period in my life when I breastfed. I also figured I'd saved loads of money not being formula or extra cows milk.

I went to 2.6 years, and gently nudged her to stop towards the end, so I wanted it to stop but I still felt very strange.

Be kind it yourself.

Azquilith · 07/12/2014 20:08

They do firm up a bit. Tho I will forever now fail the pencil test.

Original poster

ThisFenceIsComfy · 07/12/2014 20:16

Mine fail the pencil case test at the moment

Good luck Juan with tonight.

As a PP said bfing is such a complex relationship.

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Stripylikeatiger · 07/12/2014 20:22

I was devastated when ds stopped breastfeeding at around 18 months, I was pregnant and my milk had disappeared and every feed was uncomfortable for me but I still felt so sad.

Ds asked to breastfeed again 3 weeks later and he started again, he's 2 now and feeds 3/4 times a day.

I'm dreading him really stopping!

JuanFernandezTitTyrant · 07/12/2014 20:32

Thanks Fence. I think he might finally be stopping screaming. For a bottle refusing baby he took to cow's milk from a beaker like a duck to water, even has it fridge cold. That's what we did tonight (I was going to warm it but DH forgot). Fingers crossed this is it for me now.

Good luck to you too.

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