Newborn baby bf question!

[Pastmyduedate0208]

Hello.
I have a nocturnal newborn. He sleeps heavily in 2-3 hour cycle during the day, wsking for feed/change, hardly cries, meaning i get to do stuff.
I'll put him to cotbed around 9 after a feed/change, and he'll be fine, but he'll wake up for his 12:00ish feed and he'll feed, but he won't come off my breast! He'll fall fast asleep, and he goes mental if i try to move him or dare put him back to bed.
He will only settle if he is attached to me. I have tried rocking/singing/shshing but i have a mad red faced angry baby thrashing around unless my boob is in his mouth!
Then during the day he is contented baby again...
He is very little just 1 week old but i don't want to start a habit. Should i deny him the boob or just let him sleep there?

This is completely normal newborn behaviour OP. Please don't worry about creating habits. He has a tiny stomach that needs filling regularly, and he doesn't know the difference between night and day. He's just had a huge shock to the system and needs warmth, comfort and food, all of which he can get on your chest!

Is feeding going well, lots of wet and dirty nappies, pain free for you?

Please don't deny him the breast at this age, just feed on demand. It's tough being up all night, but it doesn't last forever I promise. In a matter of weeks you'll probably notice that he sleeps a bit less in the day, and you can start to get a bit more into him during the day.

Oh and forgot to say, he's like this because prolactin (the milk producing hormone) is highest at night and by feeding at night he's building up your supply. So while there are things you can do to shift feeds to the day, I wouldn't start trying any of them for a couple of weeks.

This is natural, please don't try to stop him feeding at night. Yes, the first few years weeks are exhausting but that's just how it is. Can you set your bed up safely to co-sleep then you can doze while he's happy suckling away? Firm mattress, no duvets or pillows near him, baby on your side rather than between you and DP, no adults in there if they've been smoking or drinking?

All completely normal. At this tiny age he needs what he needs. Don't worry about him forming habits, and don't deny him the boob. When he's a bit older and stronger and has a big enough tummy to drink enough milk to keep him going for longer, then you can gently guide him into a routine that works for you better, but now isn't the time. This is just a phase. In a few weeks it will be different, and that will be just a phase too.

When he is awake during the day try to expose him to as much natural daylight as possible and keep nighttime dark and quiet. This should help him to figure out the difference between day and night. It should help his body know when to produce melatonin which helps develop his circadian rhythms so that his longest sleep happens at night.

As pp have said though, this may not be that long and he will certainly still need to feed at night.

Amazing, thanks so much for your replies. You hear so much "Don't make a rod for your own back" etc... I took him outside in the pram today, I don't think he noticed though he was so heavily asleep !!

Bless... Will see how tonight goes.

Recommending a great Facebook group for support if you are on there- breastfeeding yummy mummies xx

Hi,

Don't worry. It's still FAR too early for making a rod for your own back - find ways of making it through the long nights and just let LO feed as often as needed. It's really hard going but it will settle itself in time. My ds was exactly the same, in the first weeks he was wake every hour or more often to feed/cuddle. After a while he fell into a proper pattern of sleeping, waking, feeding, sleeping instead of perma-feed-snooze-on-the-boob.

And don't worry - DS fed to sleep for months but we just stopped (10 months) and it wasn't a massive trauma at all. Routines and needs change but now isn't the time to worry about that - let your LO snuggle up - you are meeting his needs perfectly. Congratulations and keep posting for advice and support. MN was great for lonely exhausting night feeds!

If anyone ever says 'making a rid for your own back' - punch them in the face. It's a horrible, horrible phrase designed only to make you feel like you're not doing the right thing.

You are! He needs to feed, and he's doing you a favour by getting your supply going. It IS exhausting, but copious cake and resting during the day can help. It's not going to be for long, honest.

DH and I did shifts for 2 weeks with dd sleeping on one of us as she wouldn't sleep in Moses basket except for flukey couple of hours here and there.

Certainly didn't last, so do what you need to.