If you kept your DC1 in nursery whilst on mat leave with DC2...

[BotBotticelli]

How many days per week did your DC1 do at nursery? What was the right balance and what worked for your family?

Am pregnant with dc2 and currently work 4 days per week and dc1 goes to a lovely nursery 4 full days.

Not sure what to do when I am on mat leave though - planning to reduce his hours (obvs - there's no need for him to be there 4 days per week if I am at home!) but not sure what to reduce down to....

.

Other info: DH leaves house at 7am and gets home at 6.30pm and no other family help locally.

DS will be 2.8 when dc2 arrives.

DS was full time with childminder. Dropped down to three days for a month, then 2days for a few months and then he just went for one day. At 8 months he started nursery so started doing just two mornings. I had 13 months mat leave so by having fewer days I was able to stretch it out.

My DD was 2.3 when DS arrived. She was going to nursery 4 days a week while I was working. We kept her in nursery for 4 days a week for the first 6 or 8 weeks (can't remember exactly) after DS was born, then she dropped to 2 mornings per week. I was so pleased that she continued in nursery to start with - it allowed me time to sort myself out a bit before she was at home with me!
Nursery advised that if we left her in nursery she should go at least twice a week, otherwise it wouldn't be enough to be settled there. Two mornings per week is nearly covered by my childcare vouchers (which my employer continues to pay while I'm on mat leave). We couldn't afford more really. At the start I wished she was in nursery more often, but now I sometimes wish that she didn't have to go! Probably means we have the balance about right for us.
DD and DS will go to nursery 4 days a week when I go back to work in January.

BotBotticelli- hello! How lovely of you to respond. my dd is now 14 months. Things are a tiny bit easier as I'm back to work and she's in nursery part time. But since nursery her sleep has gone to pot and she's up for around 1.5 hrs at night then wakes at 530. So whilst things have got a bit easier during the day, they have worsened at night!

I have had PND too. DD is a high needs crying whinging baby who like your DS doesn't like being a baby and gets frustrated and upset over many things. She doesn't cry and whinge all day anymore but she used to. Now its more most of the day than all day!

I went on citalopram too for around 6 months. I didn't find that it made any difference as I was just down with all the crying and no matter what the drugs couldn't help overcome that feeling of baby crying so much with nothing you can do to stop it.

I'm glad citalopram worked for you. You seem in such a better place and I'm even more pleased to hear that you are enjoying your DS now! Maybe the turning point for me will come at 15 months as it did for you.

My dd isn't walking yet. I hope she does soon as I think she will be happier.

My post isn't about your original pot anymore! But you are doing the right thing by keeping DS in nursery after your new one is born. I hope you have a more positive experience this time round! I hope you are having an enjoyable pregnancy!

Thanks Chickz - walking and talking were deffo when it got immeasurably better for us too, so fingers crossed you find the same and you'll be messaging me in feb/mar to say you've seen a similar dramatic change!

2 days. He's 20 months. I had a couple of postnatal problems so had a few hospital appointments here and there so it has been useful as I just take the baby. I'm 3 months in, might reduce hours at some point, for financial reasons though

I must admit also, that I've found baby groups more tricky and stressful with two so it puts my mind at rest that he is getting some social time

Also, and then I'll shut up, I found ds 1 as a baby the hardest thing in the world. It is easier with two, than it was the first few months with 1

I'm figuring out what to do with DD at the moment. She's almost 4 and DS is due at the start of April. I'm having an ELCS so she will remain full time until at least the end of that month.

To be honest, I'll probably keep her place open full time until the end of July for several reasons:

1. She's off to school I'm September and suddenly stopping just a few months before she leaves seems harsh on her
2. I won't be able to drive/get around all that easily for around 6 weeks
3. A full time place costs £6 less a week than 4 days.
4. the cost is more or less covered by our childcare vouchers which we'll keep up while on leave.

So most likely, I'll keep her place open and shorten her days/weeks to suit what we're up to as a family.

£6 more, not less.

2 days, but upping it to 3 now as finding it tough with sleep deprivation (4m sleep regression + teething and toddler dropping nap) and need to nip pnd in the bud... 2 seems quite common with people I know but maybe people with 1 or 2 days have less time to reply ...! My nursery does as hoc days which has been a godsend. we have no family nearby to help.

wld you be doing both drop off and pick up tho? as that can also be hard work - esp drop off I find as leaving the house is hard!! if you drive its prob easier ....