Hairy Legs!!!!!

[littlemisssensible]

Hi everyone,

I've a real dilemma and I don't know what to do for the best so I'm hoping you can let me know what you think and help me decide!

My 8 year old (she'd say 8 and 3/4's!) has been asking about the Veet adverts lately and I've discovered that whilst attending one of her holiday play schemes some of the older lads (approx 10) were teasing her about her hairy legs. I must admit they are rather hairy for a little girl but not that bad. However she seems to have a real complex about them and says the hairs make her legs look puffy.

I've tried to give her strategies to deal with the teasing as I feel she's a bit too young to start down the leg shaving/waxing/hair removal path just yet but, on the other hand, she'll be doing it anyway in a few years so perhaps I'd be better helping her sort out the problem now and thus solve the teasing problem. (I have pointed out to her that the said boys may then tease her for removing the hair but she thinks she can manage that more easily!)

So what do you all think?

Should I be trying to keep my little girl for a bit longer and just teach her ways to ignore the 'idiot' boys;

Or should I help her remove the problem by removing the hair?

I have a feeling that what ever I do at this point it'll be the wrong thing and I'll be blamed for scarring her life forever when she hits the teenage years! :-(

Dh is as stumped as me, and as he has no sisters can't quite see what the problem is!!!!

HELP! :-(

Don't let her start just yet! What happens if she gets up one day, remembers she has p.e, but has forgot to shave her legs, that would be even more embarassing for her! (p.s I ike the idea that 'it makes her legs look puffy', maybe I could use that excuse for a while hee hee)

i wouldn;t -- it's the start of a slippery slope- It's coming up for winter, she'll be in tights and stuff soon enough...she needs to feel confident in her own body - need to emphasise those boys are the problem , not her legs - which i'm sure are perfectly normal.

i do see where you are coming from - so much pressure on girls no from such an early age...

Sooo young to be thinking of that!! God is that what I have to look forward to next year? I do think you need to reassure her that it is the boys who need to get a grip and encourage her to be comfortable in her own skin - praise her good qualities etc;

hi, my dd is six and has had the same problem, some of the lads at her holiday club were teasing her as she has quite hairy legs, and she asked me the other day if she could start shaving them ! OMG

Thanx. I think you've confirmed my feeling that she really is too young....I was just getting paranoid that perhaps I should be more understanding of her wanting to remove the hair. It should be easier to deal with over the winter as she can wear tights or long trousers and by next summer she'll be 9 1/2 and we can re-think!

Moomoo, I'm sorry your 6 year old has had a similar problem but a little relieved that its not just me!!!!

I've an adult dd too (22 years) and I didn't have this problem with her!

Thanx again guys!

Hi just a thought but are her haairs dark as I went through same thing when I was young as I had dark hairy legs, my mum bleached hairs on my legs so i didnt get teased but it didnt start me on that slippery shaving/hair removing slope too young.

I shaved my legs from the age of 8 and waxed from the age of 13.

I was in ballet and hair was just not on.

i had hairy arms and legs at school
didnt have a mum only my dad
got so teased that i wore pants and jumpers in boiling weather
at school i wore long socks to cover my legs

i am now 30 and even now (and i do shave) wear long sleeve tops and pants and neaver show my legs and arms
i think its just been buried in me

Can she not wear trousers for school? Or tights? It is getting colder now so you can cover her legs up.

expat - you were one brave kid it kills me now to get legs waxed and I'm 27!!

Hi there. I so understand how your daughter feels. I was a hairy (increasingly dark and coarse as I got older) kid, and can really relate to how your daughter might be feeling/being made to feel: odd/ugly/masculine. I hated it.

I remember experimenting with my mum's razor at primary school, and was regularly bleaching my facial hair at secondary school.

Hormone disorders have since been ruled out, but I'm now having laser treatment as my facial hair has become so coarse that I'm shaving it every other day, which I hate; feel like such a bloke

I agree with other posters that the ideal solution is to build your daughter's self-esteem and help her ignore cultural pressures to be hair-free. However, in the real world, the pressure to be hair-free is very much there, and since you can't change the society we live in, if you can only bolster your daughter's self-esteem so much, I would urge you to support her in bleaching/removing the "excess" hair.

Like another poster, I had a friend at school who bleached the hairs on her legs with hydrogen peroxide. This might be a gentler route into defuzzing than starting shaving just yet.

I really was (still am) pretty hairy for a girl, and feelings about this in my teens have shaped how I feel about my appearance even now: not good! So while I agree with holding out on the shaving front if at all possible, do just keep a close eye on how much it's bothering your daughter. If it really does become a big issue for her, help her get rid.

EBAB

Wow! Thanx guys, thats given me loads to think about!

For the moment I'm going to put her in tights for school and tracksuit bottoms at the gym (which is where the boys with the problem are encountered!) Her big sister has been teaching her to say 'And your point is?' in a typical stroppy teenage way which is helping her feel more able to deal with any comments.....though I think I might regret that later!!!

Once the warmer weather arrives next year I might give the bleaching a go although her hairs don't look particularly dark they just seem to be particularly long and prone to stick or 'fluff' out from her legs, hence her description of puffy legs! And if all else fails I might give in on the shaving front (although I suspect that once she knows what a faff it is she may go off the idea herself!)

Thanx again for all your advice, it has helped me sort out my thoughts and given me some ideas to try!

Please dont let her shave, use immac or something instead, doesnt make hairs grow back coarse and wiry.

I second the none shaving. I shaved my legs since junior school (10?) but then my little sister tried to experiment and cut her leg open really badly. She still has a scar there. Have NO idea how she did it - esp since she was using a wired razor! Would have killed to wear tights, trousers or tracky bottoms at school. (am now 25) am still haunted by the remembereance that aI had PE and had forgotten to shave my legs! I hope you can sort things out for her. Best of luck.

I agree with EggyBreadAndBeans if her hair is dark and course (as mine was) do let her wax or something in time for next summer, I used to shave at school and always had stubble by the afternoon, at least waxing should diminish the hair growth.

My 11 year old has also just asked me if she can shave as she's just got in the netball team. I've said I'll think about it as, like you littlemiss, i hate the idea of her starting on this road whilst still at primary school. But I think that horse has already bolted, no point in shutting stable door, she's already body conscious. i think I'll help her use immac, as it won't grow back stubbly like with shaving.

Hi, when you do decide to let her get rid of hair, waxing or using an epilator (little handheld machine that pulls hair out about £30) is a good option as if you start young the hairs grow back sparser and thinner. It hurts a little bit but if you take her to a salon the first few times it gets less painful. It only has to be done about every 4 weeks. My mum's been doing it for years and has almost no hair left at all. Good luck