DS bad behaviour at nursery following day with friend's DD

[Peanutbutternutter419]

Hi all,

Looking for a bit of advice and going to be as objective as possible as I realise my DS is a toddler so is going to be stroppy/monkey at times!

So generally when I pick up DS from nursery the staff will say how funny he's been or how he has been talking a lot but today I picked him up to be told that he had been really quite unfriendly and shouting and snatching at the other children.

The only other time that I have had this feedback was the last few times he spent time with our friend's DD who is 3.7yr
She can be very demanding and shouty which is not helped by my friend giving in to her demands if she continues to push.

For example, me and DS went round a couple of weeks ago and friends dd wanted some crisps. My friend said no but her dd just got louder and louder and eventually hit my friend. My friend sent her to her room telling her she can't have any sweets tomorrow which escalated things and my frind then said she could have crisps if she apologised
Unfortunately my DS watched all the commotion and acted exactly the same with me when we got home. First time he had ever acted that way. The next day at nursery I got bad feedback about his behaviour.

So my advice is what to do about this? I don't want to stop seeing my friend but it does concern me that he is copying her behaviour and it is affecting other children at his nursery.

We meet with other friends with children of the same age every week and although they have the odd to-do they are generally fine and I don't see a change in his behaviour at all following these meet ups.

Anyone had experience of this and can share??

Try and see this child in the holidays only! I think lots of us have had this problem and I think all we can do is try and explain that this type of behaviour is making Mummy and the Nursery staff unhappy but if he is a lovely boy and his reports are good, he will get a reward. It is always difficult to know what to do when it is a friend's child that is the badly behaved one. How about she comes to your house where she cannot be indulged in the same way? Try and meet up somewhere like the park so she is actively engaged. Try and find other children to play with. Sorry, no real answers.

Thanks for the feedback. My DS is only 21mo so i dont think he would really understand the reward for good behaviour. He is usually very good with the odd meltdown when hungry or tired...
I just hate the thought that he has upset other kids at nursery. Would hate it if it was the other way around.
It didn't really help that the NP told me that she couldn't be bothered to stick to discipline by the afternoon as it had been a long day?!

With regards to meeting outdoors, We had been out all morning and they only had about 3 hours together at our house.