DD is 2.6 and is lovely but very lively and demanding! We have pretty much decided that she will be an only. Since having her I had to give up my job as I can't afford childcare and family can't help on a regular basis so money is a constant stress. I felt very lonely and bored in the first year but now the baby stage is behind me I am enjoying being a mum and have no desire to go back to the sleepless nights and arguments with dh. I hated pregnancy (had one miscarriage previously) and although I had a fast and straightforward birth apart from a third degree tear, I found childbirth horrendously painful and feel so anxious about doing it all again. So rightly or wrongly we just don't want another.
However I feel tremendously guilty about dd being an only and missing out on a sibling. Today I had a serious wobble as we took dd out to an event with a bouncy castle and I saw a brother and sister having great fun together on it. For dd I'm her playmate and she just wanted me to come on with her. We had great fun together but deep down I felt maybe it was a bit sad.
Am I making too much of my wobble or is it a sign that I've made the wrong decision and she's missing out on something important. Should I put myself through it all again for her sake? Would she be happy to sacrifice the activities she enjoys in order to have a sibling (we couldn't afford both).
Please be kind!!