Should I not offer anything else?

[ZebraZeebra]

DS is 22 months. Standard story - ate a very varied diet from weaning but it's narrowing and narrowing. He eats generally ok but I any to widen his intake. I made a perfectly nice roast lamb dinner today - parsnips, carrot, some green veg, lamb. But he's barely touched it. I know if there was a potato on there he'd wolf it down. I also know if he was super hungry, he'd eat it, having accidentally missed lunch one day and he wolfed down a similar dinner a few days ago.

I saw a thread recently with lots of people saying that a) sometimes they're just not hungry and b) food refusal is met with keeping it available for say - half an hour, then taken away and nothing else offered because they learn they get what they really want if they wait it out.

But It it's hard to shake this idea of them going to bed hungry. He's eaten quite well today - sausages and mash for lunch, three different kinds of fruit, a good breakfast. He eats vast quantities of the few things he'll eat. I want to teach him what is offered is perfectly nice and acceptable. So should I just not offer anything else tonight?

I dint have personal experience with this so this is second hand information via other mums.

One of my friends was told that 12 decent balanced meals a week was enough for a normal 2-3 year old to grow and thrive on. This was to help her combat that feeling of neglect and hungry child. He said 12 balanced, varied meals in a week was better than the same or similar meals or perpetual snacking on similar (generally carb based) foods every mealtime. This slowly worked for her. Her DD just wasn't hungry enough to try things she was unsure of. She is now a reasonably adventurous eating 4 year old.

Another friend has a child who is extremely underweight and not growing. He is on high calorie milk supplements and must eat at every meal time. He only eats a few things and gets them every mealtime.

I think what I'm saying is so long as growing and thriving feel free to experiment a little.

This is just my opinion though.

Thanks picklesausage there's a lot of wisdom in your post! He's so thriving...so much...he's a little chunk. He's strong and vivacious and boisterous and has boundless energy. He's high on the chart for height and weight...he's not starving.

But you know, when he was born, we struggled so much with weight gain and dreadful midwives putting the fear of god into me about his very slow weight gain and it just stayed with me.

But intellectually I know, like you've relayed to me, eating the same food over and over is not the way forward. It's so tempting just to fill them up on what they will eat but it won't do him any favours.

Thank you so much for your post.

No problem. It's easy to offer suggestions when you have no emotional investment. I have never had this problem, quite the opposite in fact, she eats everything and would steal from others if she could. I have to feed her like an elephant and watch her like a hawk!

Have you decided what to do? My only other advice is when you hear him cry and scream (which he will) try to see it as rage and disbelief that he isn't getting his own way. It helps sometimes to try and distance myself from the emotional side if crying and see it as angry shouting. Also make rules that you and DH will stick to. And make yourselves stay consistent at every meal. No changing it just because you fear he won't sleep through the night. (The chief worry of my own DH.)

Good luck!