How do people cope with more than one child?

[docpeppa]

I have a nearly 2 year old DD and I'm pregnant with DC 2. I am due 28th April so DD will be 2 years 8 months by then.

I'll be honest I'm kind of shishing myself. My partner will be in work full time and I don't have family close by, so I'm worried about coping with a very active toddler who won't be napping by then and a newborn.

Is there anyone else who had a similar situation to me? Some advice would be great, is it doable without going nuts?

It is doable.... I went a bit nuts, but that was perhaps more my own background of anxiety and depression than anything to do with the kids.

Dc1 was 2.5 years when Dc2 was born, DH worked long hours and little family support.

My advice is to have your DD toilet trained by the time DC2 arrives. Will make things slightly easier, and also cheaper in terms of nappies!

You'll be having the baby in nice weather (I assume you're in UK) so think of how you'll get to take your DD to park and sit with baby on a bench.

Also, will your DD start pre-school in Sept 2015? That'll give you a few hours for free.

I loved how my DC1 was so fascinated with and proud of Dc2, honestly the love was there between them from the first day, and even now +2 years later they are best friends.

I also found I was more confident 2nd time round: with labour, with breastfeeding, with getting out of the house etc etc.

Yes, there are hard times, and it is just like bit more relentless with 2, but totally totally doable!

Thanks ROARmeow, think I'm a bit similar to you with the depression thing. Hand some counselling earlier this year that helped, so I'm more aware if I go like that again.

The good thing is DD has been going on the potty for nearly two months now, just wee, no doo doo though.

Because she turns 3 end of Sept she'll be going Jan 2016, but yeah that is going to be a massive help!

Thanks for the reassurance!

Currently pregnant with DC2, due in March, and DS will be a little over 2.5. I'm not even remotely close to potty training yet! He shows no inclination at all and I'd read that it was hormonal, not developmental, so unless he either was indicating he was aware or I want to put us through months of fruitless training and mess...I didn't think it was worth bothering yet.

OP I plan to have DC2 in a sling pretty much permanently. DS is also very active and dropped his nap some months ago. The upside to that is and early bedtime but still, the day is a slog.

But other than that...try not to freak out too much? That's my basic plan. DH is self employed so barely any paternity leave and not much family help. It's basically a case of getting on with it. Roll on the January after DS is 3 in 2016 for EYE hours!

I've got dd, five months, and ds three years yesterday :) so there's 2.7 years between them. And I'm only going a teeny bit nuts

It's relentless, my me time disappeared overnight, my relationship with ds changed overnight and I'm permanently knackered...but it's also lovely seeing the bond develop between them, I'm much more confident re baby stuff second time round (though breastfeeding was similarly awful for first few weeks) and our family feels complete. Oh, and ds is nowhere near potty training which isn't as bad as everyone says having two in nappies is I only forget to change the toddler's nappy occasionally

Accept all the help you can get, instil the capacity for independent play in your toddler now if not already there, lower your cleanliness standards and you'll be fine until the effing four month sleep regression hits

Congratulations!

Oh, and contrary to ds this one will only sleep in the sling during the day, which is actually pretty restricting when it comes to interacting with a toddler. So try and ensure your newborn will nap in the buggy/pram/moses basket is my tip.