divorce and access

[newmummy470]

I've recently split from my husband due to his infidelity. Our daughter is 6 months old and he is wanting access. At the moment he sees her 2 days a week. He picks her up at 9-30 then drops her off at 6.00
Is this too much and too long to be away from me. I obviously miss her so much and hate not being with her but I worry so much by not being with her she will lose her bond with me, worry where mummy is or just cause her emotional problems. Dad always says she is ok and she seems happy when he drops her off but I still worry.
Now he also wants overnight access. I'm still breastfeeding at night so he can't at the moment. But surely she's too young to be away from me on a regular ocassion at night. I feel like it will break her love for me slightly or make her not need me so much.
Has a gone got any eperiencd, should I defer overnights til she's older or say just do one a month.
I love her so much, I can't believe I have to spend so much time apart from her now. I never imagined this when i was pregnant.
I know her dad loves her, but there's is a definite difference between a mum and a Dad.

if you had gone back to work she would be away from you in childcare surely?

I do understand the feeling though, it took me a very long time to feel comfy leaving my dd (pfb). if she is happy and doesn't seem to be phased then let it carry on. mum is different to dad but both are important and need to be part of the baby's life.

From two weeks my ds was without me overnight as my dh did the nightshirt in a different room. I wouldn't see him for 15 hours. We are fine together.

Sounds like a shitty situation for you, sorry. Kx

Another thing that worried me is that my ex already has a new girlfriend and although I didn't want him to, he's taken Eva to see her. It's so difficult knowing me daughters with people I don't know. people keep telling me it will get easier but I'm not so sure. ????

your anxiety is normal nut unfortunately you can't control who she sees when he has access. to do so would look really bad if it ever goes to court.

your best course of action is to smile sweetly and bite your tongue unless you have a good enough relationship with your ex to be able to sit down and discuss your anxiety and see if you cam slow things down.

do you think he would consent to seeing dd for a few hours at your home while you are there albeit in a different room and work back up to him taking her all day? eventually he will ask for overnight access and without a better reason you cannot decline it I am afraid