What is life like with a happy 10 month old?

[Chickz]

I've posted endless times trying to understand the behaviour of my 10 month old. She's either crying or whinging all day long. I think some of it is teething and some frustration at not being able to walk. I've tried everything- allergy elimination diets, cranial osteopathy, baby massage, baby groups, reflux meds you name it.
I've come to accept her now- every day is so so hard and it's not got any easier.
She cries first thing in the morning, cries when I get her dreased, cries when she has her nappy changed, cries when she can't get to where she wants, cries if she falls, cries if I leave her on the floor. Yep you got it, she cries all day.
Despite all this, I really want another child - if only to prove that it isn't supposed to be like this.
So could you tell me what it's really like to have a non high needs 10 month old?

chicz, sorry to hear this distress that your DD is causing you. My DS went through a phase like this, especially after waking up from naps, and I've found that cuddling him and rocking while explaining what will be done next (e.g. nappy change or lunch or shoes on etc) helped to eliminate the anxiety or fustration. It took quite a while to reduce the crying, and sometimes he starts then stops when I have put him down and remind him of what I have just said, like "I'm getting lunch ready for you remember? your favourite!" and he almost stops and mulls over it then preoccupies himself until I return.

Oh I really feel for you.

Dd1 was like that and it was soul destroying to not be able to keep her happy. She's still very high needs and hard work now at age 3.

Dd2 is 9 months and such a happy smiley thing. Ok she cries at being layed down for nappy changing, any bumps, face wiping, and getting out of the bath - but that's about it, it's wonderful :)

The only thing is ikeep comparing them which isn't great.

Can't help you, other than to say, it isn't you.

Oh and I used to use a sling to stick dd1 on my back and mentally block her out a bit - she was with me, I couldn't stop her crying, whinging, so I just got on and went out fir lots of walks with her like that.

Sympathy op. My DS was like this from birth until he could walk at around 12.5mo. Then he gradually started to get happier.

I started tentatively enjoying being his mum at around 15mo. Now at 20mo he is a bloody delight! He is stringing words together into little sentences, can run climb jump kick a ball, throw himself down a slide etx etc. the change in the last few months has been nothing short of miraculous.

I think he just hated being a helpless baby.
Hang in there. The good times are probably just round the corner.

It's always darkest before the dawn etc etc.

Have you tried baby nurofen?? If your also is teething it might help? Sometimes at that age I have him some after a whole morning of misering and he miraculously cheered up.

A blessed relief! Dd was like yours as a baby, ds (8 months), is a really happy little thing, breaks into spontaneous laughter for no reason several times a day, he will play on the floor while I cook dinner etc etc. I had no idea just how tough life was with dd until I had him - I'd assumed she was normal and I was just rubbish at coping with babies. What I will say is that ultimately it's made me a better mum - we have a fantastic bond and understand each other well, and to try to keep her happy I ended up sort of attachment parenting, which I think ds enjoys too but which I probably wouldn't have done without dd needing it. The downside of having a happy baby now is that it could be easy just to let him get on with it, I have to remind myself to engage with him lots. At 3.5 dd is a sensitive soul and can still throw spectacular tantrums, but she is affectionate, kind, a deep thinker, quirky and I love being with her most of the time now.
I can remember the relentless crying - and can remember crying myself too many a day - but we came through it and so will you. She got better once walking, and then speech helped even more. If you haven't already, I recommend reading anything by dr sears on high needs babies (the fussy baby book is good).

Aw thank you. There is hope then! Yes I give all the teething meds. I can't wait for this dark dark time to be over.

DS was a grumpy soul to begin with too. Only settled when he could talk and run. He's 4 now and a cuddly, sensitive, fun happy boy.

DD has been much easier but still went through a grumpy phase.

I know you're probably fed up of trying things but this learn to talk DVD for babies really saved my sanity. It's only 20 mins long, but after the first 3 watches both dc from 8m ish, would watch it through. I know it's not ideal to plonk baby in front of the tv, but they wouldn't watch anything else for many months and both have at least been very early talkers. It's not much, but 20 mins peace for me was so, so lovely.

Hang on in there, it'll get easier.

I have that DVD! I'm going to put it on later!

Any luck? It took a few times for my 2 to pay attention to it but it was gold dust for us after that. Hope it brings you a brief pause to the crying.

Sympathies, my first was like this. It does get easier.

I got so fed up of her sitting still whingeing at me because she couldn't move that I did that thing where you support them with a rolled-up towel to hold them in crawl position til she got the hang of crawling. She was much better once she could get around.

Though she's still a bit of a whinger at 6

Theyaremysunshine I put the DVD on. She didn't watch the whole DVD but did tune in and out. I'll try it again tomorrow.
Great tip re crawling - I'll give that a go
Diyandeatcake- thank you re dr sears. I've come across his stuff before and it does explain quite a lot.
She can walk with one hand held - I hope it isn't long until she can walk. I think things will get better then! Well I'm hoping!