Hi everyone,
My daughter turns 8 in 3 weeks.
I posted here about 18 months ago as my daughters behaviour towards me was terrible, she would have total toddler meltdowns and hit/kick me along with a bad attitude. After advice I took from some very lovely members I got us a referral to CAMHS, who told me that she had anxiety issues and it could be helped by me toughening up on her and setting discipline (something this house was lacking!) which I did and things settled down within a matter of days after starting this. She has always been a handful but the behaviour has escalated again during the last 6 months or so. I get telephone calls from her school on a very regular basis now regarding her behaviour (usually refusal to do work, becoming aggressive towards other children, she has never got on well with others) She has been on a behaviour plan at school since the age of 4. Over this last weekend she tried to leave my mothers house while staying on a very rare sleepover because she wasn't allowed to watch another movie at 9pm saying she was running back home and that she hated my mum and that she wished my dads new gf was her 'real granny'. She is very rude towards her aunties and any time we spend there is revolves around me having to tell her off for this (we use the naughty step there as she has no room). I bathed her on Sunday and she asked if I was going in the bath so I told her I was jumping in her water, she stood up, spat in the bath turned to me and said "Enjoy your bath!" (No idea where that level of spitefulness comes from) After a difficult weekend I sat at work yesterday phone watching because I knew these things tend to come in patterns with my daughter. Phone rang and I was told by her class teacher that she refused to do work, she was left to get on with it as the teacher was busy so then she started telling other children to shut up, when this was also ignored she began telling children to f***g shut up which obviously she was then told to leave the room. at which point she stood up and threw a chair over. After the CAMHS meeting I did step up on my tough love approach, as this was lacking in our house, she doesn't use violence as a way of getting what she wants now as she knows it will not work, she does lose privileges at home for bad behaviour at school (her tv privilege is the one that works best) She has always gone through 'phases' of behaviour, she will level back out but every time things deteriorate again they're worse than before, she has pushed me on everything her entire life. I am at my wits end with this bright, oh so funny, caring little girl. She is such a fantastic person but she doesn't let the rest of the world see it a lot of time. I'm sick of waiting for phone calls when she's not with me and dealing with the behaviour that's happened when I get home, it is exhausting. I am a single parent and love her dearly and desperately want to help her.
This really helped last time so thanks in advance!
Emma 