DS (13) upset and embarrassed about 'being too fat'

[Nicole1976]

Hi all, Today I took my 13 yr old DS and some of his friends to a funfair, when they were there I let them all go in a big multi-storey funhouse and this is where the problem occurred, they were all making their way through the various obstacles until they reached one that was a bit of an issue, it was two horizontal cylinder shaped barriers which had a gap in the middle for children to go through. My son and his friends got to it and after his friends had got through just fine, my son couldn't, he is overweight and no matter how hard he tried he simply couldn't fit through the gap, his friends then tried to help him by pushing him from behind and trying to pull him from the front but it was still no use, there was loads of other kids now queuing behind waiting to get through and they were laughing at him. Eventually one of his friends got a member of staff who came and told everyone to move so my DS could come back out the way he came, he was stifling his tears until we got home and has been really upset all day.
Does anybody have any ways that I could make him feel better and stop him from feeling so embarrassed ?

I just thought I'd mention that although my children are overweight, me and DH are not.

From where are they picking up this behaviour though? If you let them eat whatever they want whenever they feel like it, where are they modelling this from? You/your dh? You are the adult here, you've got to put a stop to this. If you are making chicken/fish for dinner is it grilled/steamed or is it frozen and breaded, out of a packet? Stop with the chips and beans, except occasionally, and give them plenty of salads, or some pasta and rice instead. Stop buying so much chocolate and crisps and buy fruit instead- it's human nature to want to eat that stuff when it's in the house!

Here's some NHS advice on helping your overweight child.

From your posts I do think you need to have a real think about your behaviour though. It reads that you see your children being overweight as their issue and it truly is shocking what you are doing to them.

Get whatever help you need, but get rid of the junk, provide healthy meals, encourage exercise or no screen time. This will lead to early disease and a lower life expectancy for your children. None of us are perfect, my DS eats more chocolate than he should but is extremely active and slim/skinny.

It's not easy to break habits but you must try.