Stress with a 17 month old during DM chemo

[Sunshine1991]

Hi a little back story first my mum has breast cancer she's had surgery chemo but they found cancer on the good breast after taken it off so she's getting more chemo . My sister 13 years stays with me for about a week after but she plays up I o give her leave way but its unbearable . Often my mum calls me crying because she's upset sore tried etc . Last week got told my cats dyeing . My dd feels my stress and even saw me crying last week . Feel like a shit mummy cos of it. Why can't I be wonder women like I see other mums being?

I'm sorry I don't have any experience of chemo but wanted to send you hugs and prayers. Be strong xxxx

All I can offer you is hug! It sounds like an awful time and you are doing your best for everyone which means you are an amazing mum/ daughter/ sister.

I hope the chemo works and you can all be happy again.

Crying in front of your little one on occasion for a genuine reason is totally ok, it teaches her normal emotional reactions and that it's Ok to be upset. Let her cuddle up to you as you would do for her if she was upset xx

It is FINE to cry in front of your children sometimes.

It will not scar them for life.

Your little sister will be acting out because she is probably scared and confused so that is not your fault either.

It might help to sit her down and say 'I know you are worried about mum, I know you are scared but its hard for me too so can we try really hard to get along?'

It won't solve everything but at least she will know you understand how she is feeling.

I think you are going to have to accept that this is going to be a difficult and stressful time for you all and there is not much you can do but get though it the best you can.

If that means crying sometimes, being stressed and getting grumpy with your sister, that is ok.

You can only do your best.

I hope your mum is feeling better soon and your lives can settle down again.

Thank you next time she's here it's school holidays am going plan lots of fun things . I didn't want her friends in the house but that's unfair so I am going to allow it. My dh is looking for a job which is like a job in it self but tommorow he's going take a day of and we are all going to my mums which always cheers me up

One day at a time.
Don't expect adversity and stress to turn you into superwoman.
Its hardly fair on yourself is it?

Nobody is a supermother. They just pretend. My dds have seen me crying loads and loads of times. It's fine. You are a human, doing your best in very difficult circumstances. You don't have to be perfect at it.