Trying to stop BF :'-(

[Barbamamama]

Hi everyone. My DS is 14 months and has been a little boob monster from day 1. I've absolutely loved breastfeeding and have never used a dummy (something I think I will use next time round!) I've always fed on demand and was feeding him every 1 to 2 hours up until he was around 11 months old (not at night). but we've reached a point where he is not interested in milk in the slightest if I'm not around and tbh I'm absolutely exhausted. When he wakes he ends up in our bed and will literally stay on the boob until morning and I feel like he's sucked the life out of me!!
We're also keen to try for baby no 2 so have decided it's time to stop. I really wanted to stop gradually at a natural stage when he decided to move on but I really can't do it anymore :-(

The last 3 days We've cut it down so I'm only feeding him in the mornings, about two times between 5 and 9. My husband has been putting him to bed which has been amazing and he is going down with no feed and no fuss.
But today I have felt SO emotional, it's so hard distracting him from it all day, once distracted he's totally fine and I am sure it is the right time to do it but I keep crying and am all over the place!!!
Anyone else going through this or felt like this when they stopped?!
Waaaaaaa.

Hi Barba Watching with interest because I want to wean DS from the boob (he is 12 months) although I still don't think I'm emotionally ready

I heard that it can be quite common to get PND like symptoms when you stop BFing (understandable because you are losing a nice bonding activity). I think once your BFing hormones calm down again it should get better. It's actually one of the reasons I'm putting off stopping to be honest.

Hope you feel better soon

I would night wean first only.

Then have day feeds reduced to certain times.

Then gradually drop them with the bedtime one going last.

Easier on you and on the child.

Hi widdle, I've been trying to cut down since he was 10 months but have found it incredibly hard. The first day I stopped I felt amazing and really relieved, though I was really sad at bed time as it was the first time my husband had put him down.
In all honesty I feel terrible today but he hasn't been that bad. There's been about 5 times today when he's pulled at my top and started pulling a tantrum face but I have successfully distracted him each time and we've had tons of cuddles and play time. In fact I think I've put more effort in than before to play games, read books etc as I'd normally just shove him on the boob!
I'm starting to think maybe our one feed a day should be at bed time, not 5am but I don't have the energy to distract him (fight him off!) that early in the morning!!

I know what you mean re morning feeds Barba I have an early riser too and it's so much easier to snooze while he is feeding in the morning.

Would it help if you stuck with morning and bedtime feeds only for another week or so until you feel ready to drop another one?

Yes I am starting to think maybe I should do the bedtime feed for a bit longer... But part of me feels like if he is going down with no fuss and we've done 3 nights in a row we should stick with it... It kinda feels silly going back to it just for my benefit if that makes sense :-/
But then I'm literally on the sofa with a duvet crying at ten past six in the evening! Sorry state of affairs!

No don't go back! If he's going down without any fuss you'd be doing it just for yourself, not for him, and that's not fair IMO.

There is a difficult patch of wee pines when you stop feeding, even if you know it's logically right for you. I've bf twice, til 8m and 9m. Both times stopped for work (essential) and both times v weepy and felt dreadful about it for about a month after completely stopping.

You're doing really well. Keep going with the distraction. Try to extend the morning bf til 6am so he gets used to a later time, or it'll be impossible to settle him without and 5am will be your new getting up time.

It helped me when tearful to think of all the things I could do when not bf. Drink, go out, share childcare more. Was easier the second time because I knew that after the horrid month of tears your energy levels will pick up unbelievably, the last of the weight comes off and hormones settle down. You'll feel amazing!

Good luck.

Thanks sunshine! That's made me feel better, last night was so hard but I've also had a really sleep deprived week so think that May have something to do with it too.
I'm using the thought of not having to wear nursing bras as inspiration!